KennedyGotWings

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Kennedygotwings's favorite FMLs

By RachelDC - 03/07/2009 19:06 - United States

Today, I noticed a string was following behind our family cat. After close inspection I realized it was a plastic kite string he partially digested. I had to pull the other three feet of plastic kite tail from his rectum. He purred the entire time. FML

agreeclassic 75 190

vote type 1 5 665

By failureparent - 21/03/2011 01:25 - United States

Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML

agreeclassic 39 856

vote type 1 54 649

By Goatbeard - 15/02/2011 17:13 - United States

Today, I just pulled out of the fast food drive through, only to pull right behind a septic truck. Just as I was about to dig into my food, I noticed it had a handy window about a foot round. I had a stare-down with a turd until I could pass. FML

agreeclassic 24 165

vote type 1 4 020

By reckless - 17/07/2010 19:34 - Canada

Today, my dad found my "list". 32 guys, 4 girls. Colour coded as to who I would sleep with again and who I wouldn't, who were virgins, etc. He complimented me on my "organizational skills." FML

agreeclassic 17 555

vote type 1 61 243

By AnRom - 17/12/2009 09:58 - United States

Today, I spent five minutes trying to kill a spider with my mind. FML

agreeclassic 10 610

vote type 1 44 005