Today, my daughter told me she wants to be a stripper when she grows up, just like "Daddy's girlfriend." We're still married. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML
Today, my daughter asked me to braid her hair. When I was done, she said Daddy's girlfriend does it better. I wasn't aware we had an open marriage. FML
Today, my five year old daughter asked me what a divorce was. When I asked why she wanted to know, she replied with "Daddy wants one. He says you can have me." FML
Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML
Today, I dropped off my 19 year old daughter at her first job. It's at a strip club. FML
Today, my girlfriend hated the idea of sex so much she was willing to give me money for a stripper. FML
Today, I walked in on my dad giving my mom a striptease. FML
Today, I found out that my parents bought a stripper pole, my mom even hired a stripper to teach her some "moves." I'm scared to go in their room now. FML
Today, I walked in on my 15-year-old daughter stripping on Skype for strangers. FML
Today, I found out why my 5 year-old son's teacher acts so awkward around me. My son told everyone in his class that I work as a stripper. I'm not a stripper, I work at the strip mall. FML
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Top comments
bobert258 0
ouch
MermaidSongXOXO 6
Take her to the local fire station and ask if she could use their pole. Practice makes perfect :)
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Comments (316)
NSPrincess 0
That's hot.
DogmaT_fml 4
huzzah! ppl against the G nazis perdix, how far are you up the corporate ladder? lol im gonna become a male stripper. (not)
Helghast95 4
look on the upside you get free lap dances:)
MadaZer0 8
I'd say he's almost in snicks pants... ALMOST!!!
deathartisan 0
poor op. you shouldve become a stripper earlier. then your husband wouldnt have to see one on the side, atleast learn how so you can strip for him instead
PsudoAnon 20
Don't pretend this is OPs fault! Cheating is the cheater's fault.
RealChinese 7
i think the bigger problem is your daughter wants to be a stripper
nyc718 0
You my friend are wrong. The bigger problem is the mother is not supporting her daughter's dream of gracing multiple men with her pole dancing abilities when she is of age of course
deadsrs 0
Little does he know those pants are RADIOACTIVE!!! ahem....
Gulo_fml 0
That marriage isn't going to hold up much longer...
DogmaT_fml 4
that just reminds me of britney spears toxic
chynab 0
wow thts mean