Today, my five year old daughter asked me what a divorce was. When I asked why she wanted to know, she replied with "Daddy wants one. He says you can have me." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML
Today, my 5-year-old daughter said "Mommy, why doesn't anyone wanna marry you?" I've been asking myself the same question for all too many years. FML
Today, I explained to my 5 year old daughter that her older sister from my husband's first marriage lives with her mommy, and my daughter lives with us. She exclaimed, "It's not fair! I want two mommies like she has! Can we swap, I like her mommy better than you anyway!" FML
Today, my four-year-old asked me when I was going to die. I replied "Not for a long time, why?" He looked at me and stated "Because I only want to live with Daddy." FML
Today, my eldest daughter announced she was getting divorced. She never even told me she was married. FML
Thanks for the help
Today, while in line for my prescription, my daughter was interrogating the man behind us. I'm a single mother. She asked the man, "Do you think my mom is pretty? Want to go on a date with her?" When he told her he was married, she replied, "So? You can get a divorce." FML
Thanks, kids
Today, I told my son and daughter that their father and I were getting a divorce. They each responded with something like, "Yay! I want to live with Daddy! He buys better presents!" Their father has literally never bought anything for them, one of the many reasons I'm divorcing him. FML
Wise words
Today, my five year-old daughter came up to me and told me she wanted to be a nun. When I asked why, she replied, "So I won't get my heart broken by a boy." FML
Romance is dead
Today, my daughter came over, furiously ranting that her husband had asked for a divorce. During the conversation, I asked what she did to make him happy. She glared at me and yelled, "It's not my job to make my husband happy!" I'm on her husband's side after that. FML
Mystery man
Today, as I was taking my three year-old daughter home from daycare, she asked where her daddy was. I tried to tell her that I was her father, but she answered, "No, not you! My other daddy!" I've got some talking to do tonight. FML
Top comments
BrittanyPernell6 0
what a screwed up loser he doesn't deserve you or your little girl
Carpy 8
Blurting that out was uncalled for especially in front of his own daughter. OP, best of luck ripping him dry with child support. You & your daughter deserve better. FYL
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Comments (244)
BrittanyPernell6 0
what a screwed up loser he doesn't deserve you or your little girl
opendoorclosed 8
Take her away from that asshole, he's only going to do wrong if he is discussing divorce with a 5 year old. There should be a license to be a parent these days.
ShyAnn29 15
they deserve to live, they do not deserve to have children!! he should be sterilized if he doesn't want kids
bbucaro98 0
the wife probably deserved it
EvilPotato 15
so what happened OP did you guys get a divorce or what.
baseball6917 8
well said number 1
Eggers 2
3- no, that is an extremely communist ideal. I don't know where you live, but the constitution of the united states simply would not allow it.
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
I almost agree with 42 what of OP was a total bitch and te husband got so fed up with her he decided to divorce. But with a 5 year old involved... thats pretty cold
wintamint101 7
what does comment moderated mean
DjeePee 25
Even if OP is a total bitch and her husband is fed up with her, he still should act mature. That means that 1) he talks to her face-to-face 2) he does not say to his own daughter that he doesn't want her. No matter how justified the divorce is, you don't handle it this way. You just don't.
1221jamw 11
Wowowowowowowow it seems pretty obvious
Alwayspullout 7
However ****** up it may be that he told the kid, you don't know the rest of the situation. OP could be a complete bitch or a lying cheating ***** for all we know...
marcranger 29
there are a couple "op might have cheated" posts, and there are enough bitter men out there who assume everything has to be the woman's fault (and yes, women do this too. I'm sure there would be more than a few YDIs if a man posted this fml about his wife). or it could be trolls
swdsc 2
I totally agree with you he doesn't deserve her and her girl at all.
Skatejock21 0
lol
chino627 0
child support!!!!!!
opendoorclosed 8
@62 A communist idea to take the child away from someone as crazy as that? People like that father are one of the reasons why some kids these days are growing up to be insane, low self-esteemed, selfish and arrogant pricks. The constitution has nothing to do with this, and I am not supporting any communist ideas because I love my democracy. Leave the stupid remarks like that where they belong, inside your dumb head.
cek31076 1
I concur
emsiti 6
the fact you said its gay is stupid why is it gay i hate how people say gay as a bad thing there is nothing wrong with it. ps for all we know she could have cheated and gave away all the monthly food and rent to her new boy friend dont just assume hes horrible
lakeybalboa 0
133 is gay
PurpIe 3
AWWW that really made me sad ): just at the age of 5 and she has to deal with this bs. I'm sorry.
beccajanemgg 0
this hardly even makes sense? it's called custody and it's in the constitution. I would know.
Xo_CuPcAkLuVa_oX 6
133- being gay is wrong read a bible and u might just find it in there. I feel bad for this little girl my parents got a divorce when i was 3 and i am still deaking with all of it. Hopefully she can handle it when she gets older.
NagatoPain 4
133 your gay
Flutist 3
They do take away people's right to have children, they took the baby away from a woman who was pregnant in prison. I don't see the problem with parental testing if it would prevent perves and assholes to have kids.
BrittanyPernell6 0
thanks
chrisauh 4
And usually women are the ones that want a divorce (70%) and do it for money, this is pretty ****** up too.
YwTwss 0
i dont understand why its screwed up. he wants a divorce because he doesnt want her anymore...maybe b/c of something she does. Sure telling a kid that is wrong, but how does one even know she is telling the truth. Shes only 5...
sweetbitchx 0
he told his 5 year old daughter he didn't want her just because he didn't have the guts or the decency to talk to his wife face to face , and you don't see what's wrong with that ? seriously, FYL #63, good luck finding anyone who loves someone as heartless as you.
hansbaby 0
awe u shuld take her, he oviously doesn't deserve her and FYL divorce sucks
thefmlinator 10
Didn't You Read It Properly. He WANTS Her To Take The Kid
urdirtyolduncle 15
Don't hate the messenger!
xXSillyLoveXx 0
YOU* SHOULD* go back to first grade, you OBVIOUSLY* can't spell a damn word.
Flutist 3
Its don't shoot the messenger.
hansbaby 0
yes I know that he wants her to take the kid, and @xXSillyLoveXx shut up, nobody likes a picky person, and I OVIOUSLY (haha) don't care what u think, or else I would fix it.
teresa96706 29
woah.. wow.. I feel very sorry for you. but at least you found out ahead of time, instead of him saying it to your face. he dosnt deserve you or your daughter.
geeksaresexy 18
How is it better that he told his 5 year old daughter that he doesn't want either of them?
TheDrifter 24
He was likely discussing it with a friend and didn't notice that the child was in earshot. At that age they're like a tape recorder, they repeat everything they hear.
geeksaresexy 18
Even if it was an accident my question remains.. How is it better to hear it from your 5 year old daughter than to hear it from him face to face?
xo_kat_xo 0
I think it would've been better to find out face to face. Finding out from your 5 year old daughter is just a bit messed up.
TheDrifter 24
Well he knows the op better, I'm sure he would elaborate on exactly how and why she is making his life a living hell. At least this way she has a chance to ponder the idea instead of it taking her by surprise.
geeksaresexy 18
I like how you assume she's making his life a living hell. What if he's trading her in for a younger model? Or just decided they did it all too young and now he wants his freedom back? I love how men always blame the woman and women always blame the man! Did you ever stop to think how this will impact on the little girl when she grows up and realises her dad didn't want her? I'm not questioning why he might want a divorce, there are plenty of reasons it could be! What I want to know is how it could ever be a good thing to tell your child you don't want her?!
88joey5 4
there is no possible way to be nice and tell your daughter u don't want her
TheDrifter 24
Even if you tell her you do want her the other partner will tell them differently. With almost all custodies going to the mothers, the mother will have all the time in the world to convince her that her father is scum, mine did.
Xo_CuPcAkLuVa_oX 6
112- my parents got divorced when i was 3. when i turned 9 my dad got remarried and said he didn't want to see me again. Its possible but its life and it will move on with or without a dad. i am 16 now and have only seen him 2 times since i was 9.
geeksaresexy 18
drifter, just because it happened to you doesn't mean everyone is the same.
nicoleholeh 0
hey Idk if u gonna read this but I noticed your from Hawaii too :D
Monii_Harlz 11
You should tots smack him out then dump his ass - the way we do it in Rockingham - I hate people who walk out on there kids - it doesn't feel good when you get older, and I know that!
Carpy 8
Blurting that out was uncalled for especially in front of his own daughter. OP, best of luck ripping him dry with child support. You & your daughter deserve better. FYL
KARMAREBEL 0
dun forget the alimony
tr0llz0r 0
Cheap trick, divorcing via a child.
ImaginaryFoe 1
And this comimg from a troll, no less. I agree. OP for some reason your husband is an arse and now you get to be rid of him. Whenever you start to feel bad or miss him, remind yoirself that he not only was he not man enough to tell you himself, he put his child's feelings on the line and left you in an awkward position.
BountyBass 13
that's pretty sad
pan1cked 0
why would any father want to make their 5 year old daughter the ******* middle man? what an ass. get full custody of her and drain his bank account for child support.
volley4eva1698 0
he's a pussypussypussypussypussy chicken
Keyman1212 14
Honestly, a woman can't take all of their husband's things if the get a divorce, especially in these circumstances. Most likely she will only get child support.
TheDrifter 24
No, she will get the house, the cars, the child and half of anything he is likely to make in the future. He will get all the debt and little chance of seeing his daughter again.
scrapmetal58 9
The chance of getting alimony varies depending on the age of the couple. The younger you are the less likely you are to get it because you're more likely to be able to reestablish yourself and make a living.
profligatesoul 18
...says the person with The Bieber as his photo.
Awahso 25
it may have been a prank. My dad told me to say things like that when i was young.
agentxyv 0
that's what I thought.
geeksaresexy 18
My dad used to get us to tell our mum we'd wet the bed or broken something as a prank but never anything that harsh..
MRukkus 5
that's what I thought!
oarisimo 4
your dad is a ****** up douchebag.
sarahxD1234 5
well it's not a very funny prank .
ToyotaObsession 1
heh. kids are funny.
lalalaughter 0
yellow car.
atomicbaboon 0
yes. yes it is. and now it's time to play. scary emo guy with a mop on his head.
MRukkus 5
I LOSE THE GAME
cindayy77 0
what a loser... your way too good for him, and so is your kid, and btw, that really sucks :/