Life goals
Today, my daughter told me she wants to be a stripper when she grows up, just like "Daddy's girlfriend." We're still married. FML
Today, my daughter told me she wants to be a stripper when she grows up, just like "Daddy's girlfriend." We're still married. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML
Today, my daughter asked me to braid her hair. When I was done, she said Daddy's girlfriend does it better. I wasn't aware we had an open marriage. FML
Today, my five year old daughter asked me what a divorce was. When I asked why she wanted to know, she replied with "Daddy wants one. He says you can have me." FML
Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML
Today, I dropped off my 19 year old daughter at her first job. It's at a strip club. FML
Today, my girlfriend hated the idea of sex so much she was willing to give me money for a stripper. FML
Today, I walked in on my dad giving my mom a striptease. FML
Today, I found out that my parents bought a stripper pole, my mom even hired a stripper to teach her some "moves." I'm scared to go in their room now. FML
Today, I walked in on my 15-year-old daughter stripping on Skype for strangers. FML
Today, I found out why my 5 year-old son's teacher acts so awkward around me. My son told everyone in his class that I work as a stripper. I'm not a stripper, I work at the strip mall. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
bobert258 0
ouch
MermaidSongXOXO 6
Take her to the local fire station and ask if she could use their pole. Practice makes perfect :)
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (316)
JayyAmazingg 0
Thats So Harsh! Hes Not Worth It!
Johnnieeeeee 0
poorly written. this garbage makes no sense.
EricJ 3
Maybe your daughter misunderstood or maybe not. Talk to your husband about it. Maybe your daughter just saw your husband at a bachelor's party.
purpledp12 0
wow it's amazing how some of these people who comment are soo weird! does anyone else agree?
glasgowsmile 0
omg lol i wonder what happened after that
Mariah_Mayhem 0
291st ! (;
mytouch3g 0
fail
Jessi_Rose96 0
If he's still alive and/or has both his balls....ydi.
RuralNinja 0
You might as well get her a pole to practice on then, since if the bar is that low already, it'll never get above getting a GED anyway.
cass454 0
that's just ******* retarded you should get a new gf she's a real bad influence u mite like it but she shouldn't grow up to that get a life shit head