Today, my daughter told me she wants to be a stripper when she grows up, just like "Daddy's girlfriend." We're still married. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML
Today, my daughter asked me to braid her hair. When I was done, she said Daddy's girlfriend does it better. I wasn't aware we had an open marriage. FML
Today, my five year old daughter asked me what a divorce was. When I asked why she wanted to know, she replied with "Daddy wants one. He says you can have me." FML
Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML
Today, I dropped off my 19 year old daughter at her first job. It's at a strip club. FML
Today, my girlfriend hated the idea of sex so much she was willing to give me money for a stripper. FML
Today, I walked in on my dad giving my mom a striptease. FML
Today, I found out that my parents bought a stripper pole, my mom even hired a stripper to teach her some "moves." I'm scared to go in their room now. FML
Today, I walked in on my 15-year-old daughter stripping on Skype for strangers. FML
Today, I found out why my 5 year-old son's teacher acts so awkward around me. My son told everyone in his class that I work as a stripper. I'm not a stripper, I work at the strip mall. FML
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Top comments
bobert258 0
ouch
MermaidSongXOXO 6
Take her to the local fire station and ask if she could use their pole. Practice makes perfect :)
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Comments (316)
808heaukulani 0
I'll give daddys little girl a dollar.
GoldenWarrior69 0
haha
Sekococo 0
Teach her a TRICK and give her a cookie :) she not to far from growing up to be like mommy.
stinkytruck 0
so? you're prob not putting out for him
Villanova23 0
someone has. sexy wife ;)
VayneValentine 3
That reminds me of a song! "Daddy when I grow up I want to be a topless dancer so I can make lots of cash, So I can make lots of cash." I am in love with this one :P Just be glad your daughter is saying this at a young age, since she will most likely change it when she gets older. It'd be different if she's saying this at about 18 or so.
thebigslim 13
All joking aside, they do tend to make a good 6 figure salary..... just sayin.
mzhonesty 0
I love how a lot of people that posted can't read.
edwardg 0
haha dam thts crazy
blastvortex 4
Awwwww.... They grow up so fast.... (Time for counseling, huh... and I mean for the kid, not the the hubby.)