Today, my daughter told me she wants to be a stripper when she grows up, just like "Daddy's girlfriend." We're still married. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML
Today, my daughter asked me to braid her hair. When I was done, she said Daddy's girlfriend does it better. I wasn't aware we had an open marriage. FML
Today, my five year old daughter asked me what a divorce was. When I asked why she wanted to know, she replied with "Daddy wants one. He says you can have me." FML
Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML
Today, I dropped off my 19 year old daughter at her first job. It's at a strip club. FML
Today, my girlfriend hated the idea of sex so much she was willing to give me money for a stripper. FML
Today, I walked in on my dad giving my mom a striptease. FML
Today, I found out that my parents bought a stripper pole, my mom even hired a stripper to teach her some "moves." I'm scared to go in their room now. FML
Today, I walked in on my 15-year-old daughter stripping on Skype for strangers. FML
Today, I found out why my 5 year-old son's teacher acts so awkward around me. My son told everyone in his class that I work as a stripper. I'm not a stripper, I work at the strip mall. FML
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Top comments
bobert258 0
ouch
MermaidSongXOXO 6
Take her to the local fire station and ask if she could use their pole. Practice makes perfect :)
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Comments (316)
candy1 0
ouch....
jersyshorelove 0
well at least she doesn't want to become a hooker.
angrynegro7 16
Damn! That's a ****** up way to find out your husband is cheating on you! Here's my question: In what alternate reality did your hopefully soon to be ex-husband think that introducing your daughter to his stripper gf was a great idea?!
monsterchic72 5
omg, that sucks! :(
snuck1 0
holy crap
wiird0 0
your wife must be hot
coreysod 0
how old is ur daghter?
astro2 0
AH, the hypocrite dillema. The "if i was 80 and still could charm a hot 18yr old, guys everywhere would be like YOU'RE the man, but if MY daughter was the one banging the 80yr old id be like im gonna cut his flabby balls and shove it down his senior citizen throat situation" seriously theres two options. Get with your gf and talk with your daughter, and say [gf's name] is only doing stripping because she didnt have what she had when she was younger, a loving home and support to go to college and get a high paying job THAT, or you can let your daughter go strip, and maybe have her strip for you. Have abit of incesteous sex with her too. Either pick a ethical or unethical option.
lmaweener 0
Lol
J4cks0n 0
What can I say? ...nice family