To-Do List Blues By FML Approved - 08/10/2017 21:00 So much to do, so little desire... I agree, your life sucks 443 You deserved it 110 Share Tweet Share
Today, my boss interviewed a prospective employee, my ex-girlfriend. My psycho ex, a kleptomaniac, thinks she's qualified to be a Security Guard. Her background check agrees. FML I agree, your life sucks 23 657 You deserved it 1 524
Today, my future husband presented me with an engagement ring he had had engraved with the pet name he calls his cat. FML I agree, your life sucks 12 437 You deserved it 1 075
Today, I walked in on my sister plucking her nipples. A shame I didn't get a big fuck-off bottle of brain bleach for Christmas. FML I agree, your life sucks 33 798 You deserved it 8 246
Today, my doctor told me that I suffer from orgasm migraines. Basically, I get an intense migraine that lasts for hours after I have an orgasm. FML I agree, your life sucks 74 994 You deserved it 4 593
Today, while using the restroom at work, I dropped my keys into the toilet. I left to find something to get them out and figured nobody would use a toilet with keys in it. I came back to a bowl of dung and "Shit happens" written on the wall in lipstick. FML I agree, your life sucks 36 969 You deserved it 8 464
Today, I was running to my car, slipped, and slammed my head on the car door. I started driving to the hospital because it was bleeding profusely and I was dizzy, I called my mom to tell her what had happened. She said I was grounded for "goofing off" and that she was "sick of my shit". FML I agree, your life sucks 98 396 You deserved it 7 912