Pseudoscience By Carl - 09/07/2021 14:01 Today, I was chatting with a coworker when he said he was a "Sigma male." I laughed, thinking he was joking. He then got mad when I explained how the whole alpha/beta thing was actually debunked by its own creator. Sigma balls, dude. FML I agree, your life sucks 972 You deserved it 143 Share Tweet Share
Missed opportunities By Gail - 05/04/2021 00:30 Today, I told my wife I walked away from a £5000 bet I had a good chance at winning, because I refused to embarrass myself in public. She responded with a Star Trek reference, "Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack, rule of acquisition 109." My god, I married a heartless nerd. FML I agree, your life sucks 366 You deserved it 1 191 Share Tweet Share
Fandoms are weird By Anonymous - 08/12/2020 09:02 - Romania Today, even three months after seeing 'Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan', I can’t think about anything or anyone except Saavik anymore. FML I agree, your life sucks 297 You deserved it 509 Share Tweet Share
Today, my mother told me that for a period when I was a baby, every night she stood over my crib with a bottle of bourbon and a gun, convincing herself not to shoot me for ruining her life by being born when she was only 18. I wish I could be more like my siblings, who don't visit her anymore. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 083 You deserved it 137
Today, it was the concert of my life. I had bought tickets the minute they went on sale, and I'd anxiously waited until the concert date. Thirty minutes before the show, my friend got so drunk that we weren't allowed in, and I was stuck babysitting her all night in the hotel, completely missing the show. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 520 You deserved it 4 606
Today, I had a seizure while at the airport, ready to go on vacation with my family. We ended up missing our flight. My mom spent most of the ride home making cracks about how I'm always ruining things with my "dramatics". Sorry that I have epilepsy, mom. FML I agree, your life sucks 53 728 You deserved it 3 550
Today, my fiancé “thought he should let me know” that he has a 3 year-old son. We’ve been together for 7 years and our wedding is this weekend. He says it’s no big deal, because, “It was just a one-night stand and she has a new man now.” He doesn’t get why I’m angry and calling off our wedding. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 441 You deserved it 132
Today, I was bored so I got my little brother's toy spaceship and a teddy bear, went to my room and started flying them around, having dog fights, making explosion noises and humming epic orchestral music. My mom opened my bedroom door, showing our new hot female neighbour around the house. I'm 19. FML I agree, your life sucks 16 070 You deserved it 38 337
Today, I was at a café with my friends when an elderly man noticed my dimples. He came up to me, stroked them while whispering, "One in a million" then walked out. Now my friends do this to me constantly, even while driving home. I almost hit a tree. FML I agree, your life sucks 38 474 You deserved it 3 434