Today, I realised that when I asked my girlfriend four months ago if was she on the pill, she thought I meant hay fever tablets. I'm going to be a father. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend told me that she is pregnant. I asked how it could be possible, since she's on birth control. She said she didn't know her antibiotics would interfere with it. She's a pharmacist. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she's pregnant. She'd told me she was on birth control, so I asked her to show me. She had been sticking the pills up her vagina like a suppository. FML
Today, I found out the hard way that my girlfriend lied about being on the pill four months ago. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of five months is pregnant. Apparently, she stopped taking her pill two months ago because "we" wanted a baby. I don't recall ever having that discussion with her. FML
Today, a girl I’ve been fucking told me she’s pregnant after she told me she took the pill. What she really meant was, “Oh, that pill? That was Advil ‘cause I get headaches.” The bitch knows I have a wife and kids. She callously said, “Should've been more specific.” She can’t understand why I’m freaking out. FML
Today, after nearly 5 months of trying for a baby, I found out my wife has continued to take the pill as it gave her a better idea of her cycle and thus when she'd be "most fertile". FML
Today, my hay-fever started. I'm five months pregnant, and every time I cough, sneeze or blow my nose I either fart or wet myself. FML
Today, I found out I'm pregnant. Yesterday, I finally came to my senses and started using birth control. FML
Today, I found out that morning after pills don't work if you're already ovulating. I also found out that I might become a father wayyyy sooner than expected. FML
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Rainhawk94 27
Congratulations
damnit1989 16
Maybe you should've been more specific. And you could use condoms. It never hurts to use both types of contraception. I have to say you deserved it.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (144)
vikky538 29
you should take your own precautions that's why they invented condoms...
mako1023 1
I knew this was going to be bad when you misspelled realized
rocker_chick23 27
The OP isn't from the US. Realized is spelled realised in other countries.
hunteryager 18
Im pretty sure that spelling is used in the UK...
peterpan3112 7
z is commonly swapped out for s in words like realise, organise, and apologise, paralyse, and analyse it's not INCORRECT as such to spell the first three with a z in the UK, it's just wholly uncommon. it doesn't work for the last two though.
mollyxrose 22
Find it hard to believe she misunderstood what you meant by "the pill", but like others have said you shouldn't just be relying on the pill for contraception since it isn't 100%. Good luck with whatever you decide to do OP.
limabeans101029 21
I agree with you, but no form of contraception is 100% effective so you could say that no matter what kind they were using.
MisterGasMoney 16
Congratulations! Even if you weren't prepared, HAVE A GREAT PARENTHOOD OP!
LatvianPride 16
Wow your GF is kinda dumb..
nagasuckymyballs 1
why is it that an abortion never seems to be an option in these cases?
fierystage 8
Abortion is illegal in Ireland. Yep.
rocker_chick23 27
Abortion is illegal in Ireland.
Fmlsea 28
she probably knew that and used it to her advantage . its actually quite sad that someone would even think of doing like that.
rosso700 14
i'm sorry but YDI . If you didnt want to have a kid, you need to take control and wear a condom.
tnf0920 9
I don't understand why he had to be specific? If a guy asks if you're on the pill..uh hello, what the freak do you think he means? She sounds like a complete moron who shouldn't be having kids
worldclassrager 41
Protection next tim
jstrick11223399 10
Be a man raise the kid. If u can have sex u can be man enough to raise a kid and do right by it. Don't get rid of it. Life I precious
BeepBeepSwerve 9
shut up, you'd react the same way as the OP