Today, I realised that when I asked my girlfriend four months ago if was she on the pill, she thought I meant hay fever tablets. I'm going to be a father. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend told me that she is pregnant. I asked how it could be possible, since she's on birth control. She said she didn't know her antibiotics would interfere with it. She's a pharmacist. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she's pregnant. She'd told me she was on birth control, so I asked her to show me. She had been sticking the pills up her vagina like a suppository. FML
Today, I found out the hard way that my girlfriend lied about being on the pill four months ago. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of five months is pregnant. Apparently, she stopped taking her pill two months ago because "we" wanted a baby. I don't recall ever having that discussion with her. FML
Today, a girl I’ve been fucking told me she’s pregnant after she told me she took the pill. What she really meant was, “Oh, that pill? That was Advil ‘cause I get headaches.” The bitch knows I have a wife and kids. She callously said, “Should've been more specific.” She can’t understand why I’m freaking out. FML
Today, after nearly 5 months of trying for a baby, I found out my wife has continued to take the pill as it gave her a better idea of her cycle and thus when she'd be "most fertile". FML
Today, my hay-fever started. I'm five months pregnant, and every time I cough, sneeze or blow my nose I either fart or wet myself. FML
Today, I found out I'm pregnant. Yesterday, I finally came to my senses and started using birth control. FML
Today, I found out that morning after pills don't work if you're already ovulating. I also found out that I might become a father wayyyy sooner than expected. FML
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML
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Top comments
Rainhawk94 27
Congratulations
damnit1989 16
Maybe you should've been more specific. And you could use condoms. It never hurts to use both types of contraception. I have to say you deserved it.
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Comments (144)
Enslaved 38
You only had that "birth control" discussion once out of those whole four months? Never, talked about what to do if it failed? Hard lesson learnt. Don't put your future in someone else's hands.
conman531 23
No point in us getting you up over it now. It's too late. Good luck. And congratulations I suppose
blondeambition1 4
I said ydi because you should always be responsible for birth control yourself. Even then it is never 100%. I know of someone who was on the pill and used a condom and still got pregnant
toxic_walrus 15
If she doesn't know what that means she's clearly not ready for sex or children.
CandyPewPewPew 29
If you are not ready to be a father, please do not bring innocent life to this world. I know this is cruel to say, but I would rather u abort the unborn than you abandoning the born child as you're not responsible.
TogeBara 12
Nice to know people still force their opinions down the throats of others. There are other ways to avoid the responsibility of being a father and those ways should also be explored. (adoption, foster care) I know both have their troubles, but all options should be explored so you can make an INFORMED decision, not the currently popular one based off society's opinions. Side note: your wishes don't matter in this case, keep them to yourself.
mybubbles2000 13
I agree. Why does everyone feel that abortion is the right thing to do? It's not a form of birth control.
TheDrifter 24
Less than one percent of abortions are medically necessary. At this point it's very much a form of birth control. That said, it's her choice what she does and good luck to op. Hopefully she picks an option that doesn't cost him half his pay for the next 2 decades.
Baucis 10
#38. Eat your own words. Did you not just get done talking about forcing opinions?
cook4money 9
Why does it matter what you think? You would rather they abort, who are you to tell them what you want them to do.
amayasoma 19
She has a right to state her opinion just like everyone else. Being a parent is a HUGE responsibility. Therefore OP needs to have a serious talk with his girlfriend. If she wants to abort that's her choice as a woman. Pregnancy is stressful on the body especially when one is not ready. Adoption isn't always best. You could end up screwing the kids life. "Why did mommy/daddy give me up? Am I not good enough? Is something wrong with me?" Or the child go to a home were they are not loved and are beaten or worse.
CharlieM78 9
Sorry the mother of your child is an idiot. "The Pill" is a universal phrase for birth control not hay fever or aspirin or menopause etc. in her defense the pill is not 100% effective so relying on that puts part of the fault with you.
mybubbles2000 13
It's not just her responsibility but yours as well to prevent pregnancy. The pill isn't a 100% guarantee even if she were taking it.
cjwayy 22
Congratulations! :)
wiseKat99 13
I can't help but feel like you deserve it. You need to be more specific.
Stephanie_Jane 10
Harsh. Obviously not the way you wanted things to work out, but good luck with this unexpected path. And here I thought there was only one meaning when you say "The Pill".