Today, I decided to use fake tan, seeing as I am so pale. Everywhere I have been today, I have had children behind me. Singing the Oompa Loompa song. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I used a self-tanning towelette to help even out my tan lines and disguise my vitiligo a bit. Now my stomach is orange and my spots are even more noticeable. FML
Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML
Today, I'm so pale that I managed to get a sunburn while sitting in a bus. FML
Today, I was told to rub in my sunscreen because I looked like a ghost. I wasn't wearing any. I'm just that white. FML
Today, I'm so pale, my boss asked me whether I light up in the dark. FML
Today, I decided to get a spray tan. I'm now more orange than the current president of the United States. FML
Today, I was really badly sunburnt, so I put on some after-sun. The only type we have has glitter in it, and now I look like a sparkling tomato. FML
Today, my 15 year-old brother, visiting me for the weekend, thought it would be a great idea to switch my expensive moisturiser for fake tan cream. I'm going to work in 12 hours. I'm fluorescent orange. FML
Today, I used a tanning bed at my local gym for the first time. I went in for the full allowed time of 9 minutes. I went to school after and everybody said I looked like Trump. Confused, I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. My skin is orange and matches with my bleach blonde hair. FML
Today, it was hot out, so I wore shorts. My dad took one look at me and said, "Your thighs are so pale, it's like staring into the sun". FML
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Top comments
TheDarkoprince 0
Oompa, Loompa, doom-pa-dee-da Oompa, Loopma, doom-pa-dee-do
nicolexsmile 0
YDI
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Comments (207)
PureGold 0
Edit: whoa for some reason this showed up under the wrong comment xP. sorry lol.
Neep_fml 0
I feel your pain... I made the same mistake back when I was in grade 8. Either go to the salon to get the spray stuff done proffessionally, or use that gradual self tanning moisturizer stuff. Never use the 'insta-tan' shit from drugstores, assuming that's what you did.
WFMS 0
Why can't just accept that they are white. I'm Italian and Irish so I have dominate Irish genes so I turned out pale. But I get tan in the summer. I also have vitaligo but I don't care. I think it's sorta cool
Ramby 0
I don't believe you...
Jessaly_fml 0
I agree with 99, either use the gradual tanning stuff (works SO well) or just get a tan in the booth things.
1234five 0
HAHAHA... Why wouldn't you realize you were orange before you left your house?
hoochaymamuh 0
oompa loompa doopideedoo
AshleyRose784 0
fake
Night22_fml 4
Oompa loompa gubble-de-goo
wbrycem 0
Fag