Today, my 15 year-old brother, visiting me for the weekend, thought it would be a great idea to switch my expensive moisturiser for fake tan cream. I'm going to work in 12 hours. I'm fluorescent orange. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my sister thought it would be funny to spray my face with my new tanning spray, which is only supposed to be used on arms and legs. I woke up and looked in the mirror to see an orange blotchy face staring back at me. My parents can't look at me without laughing. FML
Today, I got my make-up remover wipes mixed up with my sister's self-tan wipes. I am currently watching my face slowly turn orange and there is nothing I can do about it. FML
Today, my son thought it would be a great idea to spray a whole can of spray tan all over my freshly-painted white bathroom walls as an "experiment". He's 18. FML
Today, my brother thought it would be absolutely hilarious to replace my cold sore cream with superglue. FML
Today, I decided to try a self-tanning lotion my friend had recommended. I put it on, and decided to take a nap. I woke up later and checked myself in the mirror, expecting to see a new, more tanned version of myself. I didn't. I'm now orange. FML
Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML
Today, as I finished putting self tanner on my legs, the phone rang. Telemarketer. After returning to the bathroom I put moisturizer on my face. As I looked in the mirror, I soon realized I'd forgotten to wash my hands. My face is now streaky orange. FML
Today, I got a second degree sunburn everywhere above my waist, for which I've been using a medicated lotion. My roommate "pranked" me by switching the lotion with a similarly colored, very caustic acne wash. My chest feels like it's roasting in hell and is oozing pus and oil now. FML
Today, I decided to get a spray tan. I'm now more orange than the current president of the United States. FML
Today, I decided to go to a UV-light party dressed all in white. Before leaving, my little brother dumped a glass of tomato juice over my head saying, "Now you look just like a used tampon!" FML
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Top comments
Spaghetti7 5
Be popular today: Get the Dorito look!
dudeitsdanny 10
Real men aren't afraid to moisturize. They don't have to, but they're not afraid to. Little boys and closet gays are afraid people will know how insecure they are, so they make fun of real men who moisturize.
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Comments (172)
Spaghetti7 5
Be popular today: Get the Dorito look!
ariannaimelda 7
Especially popular among men!
friscoed 0
Now in cheese coloring! Coming soon: Ranch!
CryMoreFMLs 15
Doritos: + Amazingly tasty. + Epic color + Epic shape + Need I go on? -- INSANELY Addicting
yummayy_ 11
Just tell everyone that you will be visiting Jersey for the weekend and wanted to fit in! :)
kendallhi 9
if u get fired from ur job then u could be a jersey shore impersonator
ribbyc80 0
or even at the zoo as an orangutang!!
Tjack_attack 0
ha
gabstahhh 8
There can never be too many Snookis in the world:)
MurphyS94 4
68- One is plenty.
gabstahhh 8
That was sarcasm. So yes. I agree. Haha:)
fm_lover364 1
70- 1 is tooany
Darklord53 0
70- are you a guy or a girl?
AnnaBonJovi 9
105 - WTF 70 is really pretty
Monii_Harlz 11
boys will be boys ;)
spoilt_ 15
her title says 'miss'
WallyTheWombat 0
One snookie is too many. But I guess if she didn't exist, then southpark couldn't make fun of her.
musiclexii124 0
Switch his hair gel with a mixture of glue and lotion.
LuukBaas 0
I just love it when the first comment is lukte
LuukBaas 0
i just love it when the first comment is liked by so many people, and Dorito's rock!
senseisuncommon 7
should have told your boss that giant ass-probing aliens kidnapped you, and pissed all over you many many times, telling you that you work to hard and you should slack back, you bravely repelled them back with saying.. "NEVER I LOVE MY JOB AND WILL NEVER QUIT ON IT",but tell him it was to late to save your skin from the disease-infested piss.
FarSide 23
Real men don't use moisturizers.
a_nutritionist 10
how much do you apply...? im hoping it was the strongest tan you can buy because if not you shouldnt be even close to fluro orange unless you applied it generously...in which case ease up turbo, you arent meant to put that much moisturiser on either.
Kennzz 0
How would you not have seen the difference in the color? Or even the difference in smell??
Sericin 2
There are already to many snookies in the world she and the rest of them should be euthanized
ChelseaXD 0
haha, wow. just tell everyone you rolled in doritos.
TheFakeFamilyGuy 10
No
ImaWiseGuy 5
come on now, you gotta give credit where credit us due, and on a creativity scale 1-10 your brothers getting 7.5 on this one....
TheFakeFamilyGuy 10
No
dolphincheddar 10
yes
Spaghetti7 5
There's something people call originality. Use it.
BluePanda114 0
All 7 says is '' No . ''
ladidaday 0
next time, try going natural(:
everybodyluvsMEN 0
shes more orange than you Katie!
JesusFishTaco 5
Try going oompa-loompa.
redfishbluefish2 13
The new hot look: Oompa loompa orange! get some today!
ImaCanuck 0
Ah, isin't that what family is for :)?
1215116a 14
Isin't....? Wow....
turdbucket86 0
I think he could take the little guy. he's 15 hold him down and cover him in the oompa loompa oil then drop him off at his friends house, fairs fair.
ImaCanuck 0
sorry I didn't realise this was a spelling bee.
Spaghetti7 5
*THE spelling bee. :)
EmyB_fml 8
take a shower ? god that would suck, FYL
brookeec 0
I bet you looked hot! ........ NOT:)
Evii_fml 5
Hahaha your brother is funny.
bria0230 0
you look cute (:
enonymous 9
I'm pretty sure the brother thought the tan cream was vanishing cream because OPs face needs to go away.
lulututu 4
I thought he was funny too:)
Busby91 0
Agreed, that's just a classic prank. if op can't figure out a way to get it off in 12 hours they're an idiot anyways.
heyimjennyFML 5
you're a guy? real men don't moisturize! he was trying to teach you a lesson.
Newboyz00185 0
But who really wants an ashy dick?
dudeitsdanny 10
Real men aren't afraid to moisturize. They don't have to, but they're not afraid to. Little boys and closet gays are afraid people will know how insecure they are, so they make fun of real men who moisturize.
heyimjennyFML 5
32 moisturizes
guitargoddess91 0
32 is adorable :] what girl (or guy, depending on how you roll) doesn't like a man with a soft touch? moisturizing is good for you :)
dudeitsdanny 10
I don't; I don't like the the feel of it. Just my hands, cause what girl wants to feel rough, calloused fingers from my playing guitar? I'm just saying "real men" aren't afraid of what people think. Little boys like to attack everything that they don't think cavemen would have done.
heyimjennyFML 5
sure you dont. I'm not a little boy and they're not afraid. it's just..different lol that first comment was a joke anyways But thanks for the "information" about real men and little boys!
Darklord53 0
my lotion keeps my hands soft :]
SmallTownCutie 0
63, just stop.
Newboyz00185 0
Seriously! if you're a girl, would you want sandpaper hands "touching" you?
tmarie21 0
where does it say op is a guy???
heyimjennyFML 5
at the very top there a little blue thing
j_cat187 20
oompa loommpa diddy do i got a story just for you..from there in lyricaly impaired due to writers block so somone thats good with the rhymes:
DocBastard 40
What do you get what your brother visits? A house full of noise and a face full of zits. He swapped your lotion for some oranging cream This is a nightmare not...a...dream. Oompa loompa doompa dee do You've got a face that's orange, not blue Oopma loopma doomapa dee dee Don't kill your brother, ship him to me.
OCDC 9
Why do you want a 15 year old boy shipped to you, doc? Oh wait, I guess you're still finding victims...I mean patients, to practice your vasectomies on.
DocBastard 40
Vivisections, OCDC. VIVISECTIONS.
ktsthrlnd 3
dress up as snooki and call it costume day at work. but you still have 12 hours to wash it off!!!