Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated, "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was giving a presentation in front of my class. Mid-speech, I felt a sudden urge to sneeze and tried to hold it in. Instead, I let out the most obnoxious, window-rattling sneeze imaginable, complete with a spray of snot, which landed on my notes. I think I traumatized my classmates for life. FML
Today, in bio class, we were studying the reproductive system. I don't like talking about this stuff, and I twitched every time my teacher said "penis" or "vagina." When I told my family, they laughed and kept repeating those words just to see me twitch. FML
Today, I was giving a class presentation, when I suddenly sneezed so hard I wet myself. FML
Today, I let out the most horrific, loudest, and most vile smelling fart I have ever had in my life while in the middle of yoga class. Out of embarrassment, I tried to lessen the tension in the silent room by giggling, but no one saw the funny side. I was given looks of horror, and avoided by everyone else for the rest of the class. FML
Today, I had a nasty cough, but I went to college anyway. When I walked into class, I could practically smell menstrual blood in the air. After a few coughs, our instructor gave me an "Oh, shut up!" After half an hour, she kicked me out for not "taking the class seriously". FML
Today, I was feeling sick and I farted really loud in the school's girls bathroom. Some boys overheard from the hall and called everyone over. I came out only to find about 20 guys staring anxiously at the bathroom's door to see who I was. FML
Today, at school, I was scheduled to give a presentation to my class. As I arrived, my teacher said to me, "You're bleeding from the 120th pimple on your left cheek." FML
Today, I was to give a presentation to several of my company's senior employees. The moment I stood up, I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart that lasted a good two or three seconds. When I tried to utter an apology, I clammed up and let out a whiny grunt. They were not amused. FML
Today, I was supposed to present a speech on diabetes. The girl who went first chose the same subject, knowing I'm diabetic and that it was my topic. I went last, so I had to change half of my speech on the spot. I sounded ignorant about my own illness. FML
Today, I had to give a speech on abstinence to a bunch of teenage boys, and surprisingly they were paying attention. After they left, I went to the bathroom and saw I had missed a few buttons on my blouse. The boys had a close up view of my cleavage for three hours. FML
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Top comments
dragonstrike94 8
Well its sometimes true
koolkat27 13
11- um.. that's actually what you're supposed to do.
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Comments (176)
dragonstrike94 8
Well its sometimes true
eeppiicc 8
Hopefully you followed up that statement with how to get rid of the stink..
yuzuhere 21
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
That's what stinks about being a girl. You can't wash your ****** with soap. D:
koolkat27 13
11- um.. that's actually what you're supposed to do.
Eiregal2 10
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
sometime? to me they always smell. unless you are like me and cleanse yourself almost obsessively every day.
shannonreneee 11
22, soap can irritate and upset the pH, which can create more problems. There are other ways and products besides plain old soap. But even still, 26, a ****** shouldn't have a noticeable or bad smell with or without cleaning - go to a doctor.
Eiregal2 10
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
oh features,I got slot of thumb down.also I never said I smelled bad I meant the private area can be a smelly area most times.
Eiregal2 10
I also apologize for my shocking typing. I'm in bed and have taken sleeping tablet for the night. also I am just too damn lazy to correct anything.so I shall lay down now and let the vultures attack!
felisaa 5
50; the first part of your comment is painful to read...
UrbanOutfitter 2
It's ok you're forgiven
mrszane93 5
Wow really? Yes you can.
banana_buddy 6
OP should have then proceeded to pull down his pants and ask for a volunteer to demonstrate how to have safe sex.
ObsessedWithGays 7
They really shouldn't if you have good hygiene. Thankfully I've never had to deal with smelling bad down there, but I can imagine it being repulsive. Ew.
lylotrezor 20
117, THIS. Thank you.
bteundeadmidget 5
11 what I don't get is why you got thumbed down you just stated your opinion, I guess opinions are not allowed it is more of a one sided opinion
herrobear 0
142, number 11's use of the word "can't" strongly implies that she was trying to state a fact. What's this opinion business you're going on about?
zombiejombie 0
That's why there is Summer's Eve.
kschlicke 11
#71- No she is not..
lakinre 2
Yeah, like your ball sack smells any better?
kumarina 35
Yeah, he should say something like, is normal that they smell, but there are some smell that are not, trying to make it out of an awkward situation
Molzen 3
Well, they are stinky..
PrimeEvilTahir 24
At least he didn't bring up 'blue waffle'
boating_guy 33
who knows, he might've ended up there later in the presentation haha
hkelley9 6
Not if they're well maintained.
bacon_strip96 0
No mine isn't I clean that shit
mvems 13
No. Actually they are not. They probably develop an unpleasant smell from a lack of personal hygiene. But you know, see how rosy a penis smells after some deprivation of soap and showers. I think it can be a two way street!
hatesfate 6
59 - if there's shit in your ****** you might want to start wiping front to back instead of back to front.
mvems 13
Your so elegant
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
Yea, you can get infections like that
italiancows 8
#2, I bet you everybody that thumbed down your comment were girls.
AnwarK95 1
Hahah I LOL'd in class
kattylizbeth 19
159: ahahaha!(: me and my best friend sing that song literally everytime we see each other. Total win!(:
Nabee143 3
66 Where the heck does it say she has shit in her ******? WTH
carbivore 10
Oh, italiancows, ask me how balls smell/taste after my boyfriend's been at work all day. Saying that vaginas are smelly to a woman is offensive because we've already spent our entire lives wading through messages saying we should be ashamed of our bodies, so that even if we do find a guy who loves us and wants to have killer sex with us, we're ashamed of the way we smell. Even though it's natural. I'm sure this happens to some guys, but I'm also sure it's WAY less prevalent.
heyhihello95 12
Way to stick with your topic
superswagbro 7
How does OP even think of that?
UrbanOutfitter 2
A fishy smelling bagina is a symptom is an STD and yeast infection or bacterial
Llamacod 11
So 77, it has to be both an std and yeast, or bacterial; it couldn't be just one of the 3?
nofearjenshere 12
Oh no, maybe I should get my bagina checked!
itwasallyellow 0
It was a good hook!
DocBastard 40
UrbanOutfitter - No, a malodorous ****** CAN be a sign of bacterial vaginosis, or it can be a sign of poor hygiene. Yeast infections typically don't have an odor, nor do STDs.
melikesfml 11
Doc, haha vaginosis? Is that like ****** halitosis?
wallandpiece 16
Sexual frustration.
lorenzoman77 7
At least OP didn't ejaculate his opening statement too early.
wallandpiece 16
I looked at my comment and it had 69 thumbs up. Ha ha. Get it? It's a sex postition. That's why it's funny.
CryMoreFMLs 15
You don't say. Tell me more, please. I'm just dying to know of any other realizations.
Donat96 20
What were you supposed to say?
djxerxes9000 18
Anything but that
Azula272 14
Vagasil! Haha
LaughinStock 16
LOL when you got fungal down in your lady jungle. Vagasil cream!
j_cat187 20
Dirty mouth? Vagasil!
j_cat187 20
#90 Umm that was the joke. herp derp
kandi_kid69 15
Dirty ******? Clean it up. No? Okay. (._.)
Mandybruin 15
****** smell so bad that the paint is peeling off the walls? Try Stank No Mo'!
clarissasyima 7
Don't worry OP, one day you'll look back and laugh at it :).
fortunelady 17
Oooh, there go your chances with any girl in your course. :( FYL though, presentations are nerve-wracking. Especially when talking about something unpleasant like STDs and vaginas to a roomful of women.
clarissasyima 7
You never know maybe one of the girls will thought it was cute that he got nervous an will give him a chance :)
clarissasyima 7
*and
seriouslythat 6
10 maybe one of those girls might want to prove OP wrong ;)
MerrikBarbarian 9
Hopefully you finished "when infected with std's, bacteria or yeast". On the upside that's one hell of an icebreaker. You've already said the worst thing possible so now you can go on without fear of screwing up.
nachiketin 11
Since OP was nervous wreck already, I don't think, he might have corrected it. Anyhow FYL.
urMaster 0
They're stinky if the woman lets get ****** get stinky!! I keep mine fresh! Ha! :)
b0ngs 7
Thats great to know! Tell us more...