Today, while cashiering at Walmart, a creepy guy came in buying... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By annie - 23/04/2021 02:13

Today, while cashiering at Walmart, a creepy guy came in buying jumper cables, a car battery, WD-40, a Fisher-Price play guitar, laxatives, and one of each flavor of yogurt. Curious about the interesting combination of items, I asked what he was up to. He simply said “Necromancy” and then left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54

You deserved it 41

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

No comments yet.

Comments

No comments yet.

Keywords

Cute Health Music Love Coworkers TMI Gross Work Parents Money Racism Customers Scary Kids Technology Gamers Geek Poopoo peepee Intimacy Sex Anxiety Stressed out Mental health Neighbours Miscellaneous Garden Relatable Transportation Ableism Disability

The Top

Today, I found out my dentist is retiring. This wouldn't be that big of a deal except that if we want to transfer our dental records to a new dentist we have to do it before he retires and there's a $30 processing fee per person. Three of us use that dentist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 76

Today, I literally caught my husband with his prick in another woman’s mouth and he had the nerve, the actual nerve, to tell me, "It’s not what it looks like, babe", all while trying to stuff his lipstick-coated knob back in his pants. CRETIN. IDIOT. CHEATING SCUM. FML

I agree, your life sucks 672

You deserved it 162

The Top

Today, I gave my wife a $900 necklace as a special Christmas gift. She gave me a set of Star Wars pajamas. As it turns out, I was more excited to wear my gift than she was to wear hers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 292

You deserved it 5 854

Today, an old man, while I was working, asked me to spell average-length words. Confused, I refused. Turns out I was apparently taking too long counting the large amount of small change he'd given to me, and he assumed I couldn't count or spell. I study law, and I've learned basic calculus. Welcome to retail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 783

You deserved it 1 002

Today, at my graduation for my high school GED, my parents said they were getting all my family and my girlfriend together. So we all went out to a steakhouse down the road, everyone ordered steaks. Turns out the 'surprise' was me paying. I only got 50$ grad money, and the bill was 159.98. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 856

You deserved it 5 022

Today, I was working at a local restaurant when another server's table called me over to ask if I've "ever killed anybody". They informed me I looked like a serial killer. I informed them, of course, that I have never killed anybody. Another customer claimed I scared her child. I was fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 990

You deserved it 4 670

Today, my mother-in-law "borrowed" my dog without asking, to show him off to her friends. My dog is my service animal, and I'm not comfortable leaving the house without him. I have to be at work in an hour, and she's not picking up her phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 261

You deserved it 434

Today, I went to a dance with the boy I like. To my delight, he tried to pick me up. To my dismay, he couldn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 360

You deserved it 6 901