This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By kaijen - 09/09/2016 05:11 - United States - Washington

Spicy
Today, my husband and I had sex for the first time in months. Afterwards, when he thought I was asleep, I caught him jacking off to porn. His defense: "Why should you be the only one to get off multiple times?" I got off once, from the toy he used, pre-sex. He then got mad at me for catching him. FML
I agree, your life sucks 18 058
You deserved it 2 472

kaijen tells us more.

Unfortunately, not many of you guys are getting my problem. We have been together for 5yrs. I've had a high sex drive our entire relationship. He watches **** almost every night, after I've gone to the bedroom. We HAVE discussed this... MANY times. He says jacking off is just less work and he'd rather use his hand than undress and have to worry about having sex, therefore being "too spent" for sex for sometimes months at a time. I have no problem with **** or ************ in general. It can be a healthy, sometimes needed release. But not when your wife is horny all the time, always doing the experimentations you ask for, and you just don't want to take time out of your Play Station time to actually have some intimacy. He was done with me after he got off after less than 3min and instead of asking for a Round 2, which he KNOWS I'm always down for, he went and hid what he was doing.

Top comments

Communication is the most important part of any relationship. How can you hope for a problem to be solved if your other half isn't aware of it in the first place? I'm not criticizing you or your husband, I just want you to remember that healthy conversation about these issues is the healthiest way of resolving them.

Comments

With him jumping to **** so quick I think he's been doing that for quite awhile...hence the month statement

nykkilynn16 7

And hence the OP being upset. My sentiments exactly.

He should be able to ********** without defending himself, and why it would be that you "caught" him is beyond me. Jeez this sounds so unhealthy and controlling to me

I have a degree in Psychology. Absolutely right, the guy is normal, the woman is poorly communicating and controlling.

I've gotta say, I'm glad I don't go to you for psychological help. #1- I am FAR from controlling... I'm usually the one being controlled. #2- even HE admits his **** addiction is out of control; he's just too far gone to care. #3- the degree in which he relies on **** is NOT normal. You have a degree, right? What all do you know about **** addiction then? Because that is what I'm dealing with. But hey, thanks for that two cents. I can see that degree really helps you read between the lines.

#53, now you have explained it makes much more sense. I think they were basing it on the original fml which gives little room for detail.

I'd be upset too if my boyfriend decided **** was better than asking me to go for another round. **** isn't really the problem, it's more that when you're in the same room you don't really expect for it to take precedence. You should really sit down and talk with your husband about what you both can do to patch up your sex life.

He also thought she was asleep. If my wife is asleep when I'm aroused, then taking matters into my own hands is much quicker, easier, and less messy than trying to rouse her for sex.

I am thinking OP wasn't so upset that her husband was looking at ****, as everyone is assuming. I think she was more upset that after not having sex for a long time, she was probably insulted or hurt that it wasn't enough to satisfy her husband or was thinking he should have tried again with her if he wanted another ******, since she could have used another as well. He chose **** over his real live wife. Obviously, they still need to communicate more.

In fairness though he did think she was asleep. It is actually kind of considerate that he didn't disturb her sleep for his own desires. The OP may be taking it as he waited for her to go to sleep but the likely reality is that he wasn't ready for another round until after he thought she was asleep. From what I've come to understand from men, if they are in fact able to go a couple of times it still requires a bit of a break between the sessions.

I mean... he thought you were asleep. I understand if you're just upset that, after not having sex for such a long time, it didn't seem to be enough for him. But if you always get upset when he watches **** then that isn't fair.

************ and watching **** is completely normal for any mature person. There should not be an acceptable or unacceptable time for anyone to ********** (in the privacy of there own space of course.) If you aren't having certain sexual needs fulfilled by someone, you tell them. You dont shame them for masterbating. Sounds like you both need to work on your communication skills.

steam_engenius 21

Was I the only one whose first thought was "why has it been months??" ? I mean, there are perfectly valid reasons as to why this may have been the case, such as an illness, or pregnancy, but OP doesn't indicate this is the scenario. And why did he think you had multiple?? Do you usually? If he's able to have such a quick turnaround he is probably young and/or has a very high sex drive. Sounds like his needs aren't being met but instead of communicating he resorts to pornography. Time for a heart to heart with him, OP.

Sometimes it can simply be a case of low sex drive (maybe OP's sex drive has recently increased) or never being able to find a good time- often with my ex boyfriend, when one of us was up for it, the other would be feeling really tired or be really busy or away. I agree that they need to talk about it though.

I've had multiple heart to hearts with him. I just can't compete with a **** addiction.

He probably felt the urge right after and didn't want to bother you

Beatin ya meat don't matter. It's the love that counts not the sex. Plus Beatin my meat just feels good.