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Today, I noticed one of my neighbors has decided to place an old toilet in the middle of their front lawn. Another one has had a kitchen sink in their driveway for a year, and yet another has a sofa in their grass. These are the people who taunt me for just walking my cat outside on a leash. FML

Today, I was riding my bike home from the store. Wanting to impress some passers-by, I tried to do a trick on a sharp turn. I hit a pole with my balls. As I was lying on the ground in agony, a guy pulled over, took a picture, and took off laughing. FML

#20602636
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25014) - you deserved it (48478)

On 04/18/2013 at 5:02pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Bulgaria (Sofiya)

Today, I had one of the worst first dates of my life. After leaving the restaurant early, we went to a party to try and salvage the night. My date then got wasted, ended up puking in the back seat of my car on the way home, then lied about it. My night ended with me cleaning vomit out of my car. FML

#8540042
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25012) - you deserved it (3535)

On 02/22/2010 at 12:17am - love - by shwasted (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had a weird dream I woke up on the bathroom floor at my local gym. Turns out it wasn't a dream, and I passed out from "overworking myself". I was on the treadmill for under 5 minutes, walking. FML

#10834271
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25012) - you deserved it (13343)

On 05/29/2010 at 1:28am - misc - by crashingdown - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I decided to dye my hair to freshen up my appearance. I asked my husband for his opinion, expecting him to recommend a color. He then asked me why going on a diet wasn't my first option. FML

#13077269
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25012) - you deserved it (10761)

On 09/16/2010 at 7:27pm - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out that every single picture that I have ever sent to my boyfriend, his father has also received. Every. Single. One. FML

#21337935
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25010) - you deserved it (27027)

On 01/15/2015 at 10:43pm - love - by everysingleone - United States

Today, I found out that my favorite band logo is no longer being used by said band because of copyright issues. I have this logo tattooed on my body. FML

#21100070
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25009) - you deserved it (54647)

On 03/30/2014 at 10:27am - misc - by Cult (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I spent two hours making a cake that I'd promised my class for weeks. I boarded the train to school, but soon dozed off. A few minutes later, I awoke with a start and noticed a chunk of the cake missing and a homeless man next to me with frosting around his mouth. FML

#13717829
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25008) - you deserved it (7673)

On 11/04/2010 at 7:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I had to lie to my boyfriend and tell him that the red bumps around my nipples was heat rash, rather than admit it was actually razor burn. FML

#20110590
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25008) - you deserved it (8702)

On 10/10/2012 at 3:07pm - intimacy - by hairynips (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my new anti-social cat started rubbing on my leg. I thought she must be warming up to me. Then, I looked at my leg and saw she smeared poo all over my work pants. FML

#9037311
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25007) - you deserved it (3061)

On 03/13/2010 at 12:18am - animals - by Brinty (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, it's either be alone and miserable, or go on shitty dates and be miserable. I have no other options. FML

Today, a toddler's play ball rolled over to me in the park. I playfully pitched it to him as his parents watched from afar. The ball hit him in the face. FML

#3469
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25004) - you deserved it (3558)

On 01/29/2009 at 6:08pm - misc - by Noname - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered that airbags aren't nearly as comfy as they look. FML

#17375706
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25003) - you deserved it (4248)

On 08/05/2011 at 5:57am - health - by jbthedude - United Kingdom (Dorset)



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