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Today, my mom drove my family to the desert for a themed family photo. We had to wear big frumpy old western-looking clothes in 115 degree weather. Hot and agitated, I muttered, "This is the ugliest thing I've ever had to wear." My mom, looking hurt, replied, "That's my wedding dress." FML

#8630482
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14727) - you deserved it (20746)

On 02/25/2010 at 12:09am - misc - by Lespoon (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while working at the coffee shop, I had to empty the garbage cans. One of the bags gave way, and all the half-finished cups of coffee spilled all over my uniform. Most customers' orders cost more than I make per hour. FML

#20166731
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14724) - you deserved it (1603)

On 11/17/2012 at 1:35pm - work - by overpriced coffee shop worker - United States (California)

Today, my dad went through all the trouble of sneaking onto my laptop and photoshopping a bong into my Facebook profile picture, apparently just so he could win a €20 bet with my mom, that hinged on her grounding me by December. FML

#20178213
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14720) - you deserved it (864)

On 11/25/2012 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Europe

Today, I sent my boyfriend some nude pics of me. Later I get a text from my dad asking me when I had gotten a tattoo. FML

#5189
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14719) - you deserved it (45714)

On 02/02/2009 at 7:56am - intimacy - by Nikki (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend still won't talk to me, after I caused him the "worst embarrassment" of his life in front of his friends. What did I do wrong? I joined their conversation and ended up confusing the fictional characters of Gollum and Yoda with one another. FML

#20545430
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14717) - you deserved it (54425) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/15/2013 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Centre)

Today, I got a job babysitting two really sweet kids. When their parents left, they told me that their cat had died. I told them how sorry I was, to which one of them replied, "That's okay. We still have him in a box. Wanna see?" FML

#20123166
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14715) - you deserved it (1144)

On 10/18/2012 at 9:57pm - kids - by Jessica - United States

Today, I treated myself to a spa day at home. First, I decided to do a hot oil treatment on my hair. I was leaning over the saucepan of oil on the stove when it flared up in my face. On the bright side, I no longer have to worry about plucking my eyebrows. FML

#1800001
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14713) - you deserved it (36592)

On 05/10/2009 at 12:48am - misc - by torchy (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom decided to wake me up by pouring ice cold water on my face. Again. FML

#20136629
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14712) - you deserved it (2794)

On 10/28/2012 at 6:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was trying to convince my flatmate to agree to let me get us a kitten. After gushing about how cute they are, and showing her loads of pictures, she just stared at me and said, "You really need a penis inside you now and again." FML

#20087001
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14710) - you deserved it (18872)

On 09/24/2012 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by foreveralone (woman) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, I bought a fish. I put the tank on top of the fridge so my cat wouldn't get at it. I'd forgotten to buy some things for its tank, so I quickly ran out to get them. When I got home, I saw the tank destroyed on the floor, and my cat devouring my fish. I had the fish for less than an hour. FML

#20497647
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14710) - you deserved it (23756)

On 02/07/2013 at 10:58pm - animals - by fish killer - Canada

Today, I had to sit between my parents in the car as they argued with one another for a whole hour over whether or not a thumb is a finger. FML

#19388204
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14707) - you deserved it (1200)

On 04/01/2012 at 12:15pm - misc - by totalloss - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to convince my 28-year-old boyfriend to take down his booger wall. FML

#19584469
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14706) - you deserved it (3489)

On 05/06/2012 at 10:03pm - misc - by fock (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while bussing at my restaurant job, I felt a cold, wet animal slither down my leg. I started shrieking loudly and dancing dementedly to get it off, and everyone in the restaurant turned to stare. Then I realized there was a hole in my pocket and some quarters had slid out down my leg. FML

#19979543
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14706) - you deserved it (5099)

On 07/23/2012 at 11:41am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)



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