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Today, my husband and I were going to have sex for the first time since having our baby, who was taking a nap. As soon as we lay down in bed, his mother rang saying she was five minutes away. FML

#8663414
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22277) - you deserved it (2079)

On 02/26/2010 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by Ineedit (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I fainted for the first time in my life. I was in the shower. With my girlfriend. Apparently, my brain and my erection had a battle for who got the most blood, and my erection won. FML

#6583595
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22276) - you deserved it (3170)

On 12/03/2009 at 12:50pm - intimacy - by Silent - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I was on the phone to my boyfriend in England. I live in Australia. What did he talk about for 15 minutes straight? Mafia Wars on Facebook and how far he had got. FML

#7885768
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22276) - you deserved it (4866)

On 02/04/2010 at 8:35pm - love - by MafiaWarsWidow (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after staying in bed all day for a week from sickness, I get up to tell my mom I have terrible back pain and feel extremely dizzy. After curling up on the chair next to her, not being able to keep my head up for too long, she simply stares at me and says, "Can I finish my dinner now?" FML

#13720258
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22276) - you deserved it (4917)

On 11/04/2010 at 10:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was playing World of Warcraft, when all of a sudden, I remembered I was supposed to be at a wedding. I was 25 minutes late to my own wedding. FML

#20880446
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22275) - you deserved it (89617)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was in the shower getting ready for a date, when my older sister thought it would be a laugh to turn out the light. Getting out of the shower to turn it back on, I slipped and hit on my head on the counter. Thanks, sis. FML

#8250617
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22273) - you deserved it (2654)

On 02/14/2010 at 2:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I was woken up at 6am to the sound of my mother on the back deck of the house hooting like an owl. FML

#18346239
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22273) - you deserved it (2137)

On 11/25/2011 at 11:24am - misc - by tireedddddd - United States (New York)

Today, I purchased a brand new television. Not long after the professional who hung it on my wall left, it came crashing down on my hardwood floor. I'm now left with a busted TV, a tear in my living room wall, and a severely drained bank account. FML

#20125611
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22273) - you deserved it (2372)

On 10/20/2012 at 6:48pm - money - by fuck gangnam style in the anus - United States (California)

Today, I received my first Valentine's day present ever: a dead mouse from my cat. FML

#8241571
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22272) - you deserved it (3370)

On 02/14/2010 at 8:24am - animals - by lex31 - United States

Today, my mom decided to only speak to me through our pet cat. FML

#17755908
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22272) - you deserved it (2417)

On 09/16/2011 at 1:40am - animals - by izu - United States

Today, my husband and I went to our first counseling sessions, where the main focus was communication. When the therapist called us in together to discuss techniques we could use at home, my husband looked around, rolled his eyes, and responded with, "Uh huh" to every question. FML

#19144209
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22270) - you deserved it (3493)

On 02/23/2012 at 2:59am - love - by atsukobo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, working at a daycare centre, when packing up the kids' beds after sleep time, I slipped and landed in a puddle. Of urine. I had no spare pants. I had to wear them for the rest of my shift. FML

#18459141
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22267) - you deserved it (2763)

On 12/08/2011 at 7:40am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I dressed in my sexiest clothes to meet my new boyfriend at a restaurant. As I was a bit early, I took the opportunity to smoke a cigarette outside while I waited. The restaurant owner came out and said, "Hey, you. Go and 'work' somewhere else, please." FML

#600
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22266) - you deserved it (16338)

On 12/26/2008 at 1:32am - misc - by Lola - Sent from mobile version



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