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Only FMLs I didn't vote on | All the FMLs

Today, I found out that I was held back in preschool because of some developmental issues. My parents didn't think it was important enough to mention it to me. Why hadn't I figured it out? They also lied to me about how old I was. FML

#4247689
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68106) - you deserved it (3968)

On 08/03/2009 at 2:31am - misc - by dumb (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I saw a woman breast feeding her child at the local park. That would have been just fine if the child wasn't at least 8 years old. FML

#20474414
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34008) - you deserved it (3491)

On 01/23/2013 at 3:33am - misc - by TheLastSerenade (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, thanks to our computer's browser history, I found out that my wife has been searching for local therapists who deal with cases of severe sex addiction. We've only had sex twice since we got married four months ago. FML

#20487689
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32625) - you deserved it (3260)

On 01/31/2013 at 12:08pm - love - by papersofdivorce (man) - Peru (Lima)

Today, my psycho stepmother and I got into an argument, and she started to get physical. After calling the police, and a cop showing up at the door, he took her side because she said it was "discipline". I'm a 29 year old man. FML

#16029650
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32162) - you deserved it (4762)

On 05/03/2011 at 4:19am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my new friend and I went out to a concert. When we came back to her house, she ran upstairs and left me alone. Suddenly, a naked man came into my view and I stared at him horrified. Great way to meet her Dad. FML

#17404352
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26616) - you deserved it (2297)

On 08/08/2011 at 3:10am - misc - by noooo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was complaining to my boyfriend about our excessive water bill. He then says, "Don't look at me, I don't even shower." FML

#18325546
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27161) - you deserved it (5422)

On 11/23/2011 at 10:16am - money - by jshibbz0993 - United States (Florida)

Today, as always, I have a very weak stomach. I'm in Japan right now, and all the unfamiliar foods set me off every time I eat. I can choose between having a great time and starving myself half to death, or sitting in my hotel room all day with stomach pains and diarrhea. FML

#19899821
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19594) - you deserved it (2804)

On 07/06/2012 at 12:04pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, my dad walked in on me singing "Bohemian Rhapsody", while spinning in circles with the cat in my arms. I thought I was home alone. FML

#12797830
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12602) - you deserved it (26229)

On 08/29/2010 at 12:54am - animals - by Hobbsie - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I called out "personal" from work because I had to study for a major test that is taking place tomorrow. An hour later my manager called to fire me for "not taking work seriously", then I got an email that the test is being postponed. FML

#9081511
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22675) - you deserved it (3467)

On 03/14/2010 at 7:13pm - work - by Laurendorcus - Sent from mobile version

Today, there was a potluck at my girlfriend's house. I had a sour stomach, so I went to the bathroom to relieve myself. When I flushed, nothing happened. They had to call a plumber to fix the toilet filled with my crap. The whole family watched, noses plugged and faces cringed, looking at me. FML

#1711398
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51076) - you deserved it (4256)

On 05/07/2009 at 3:40am - misc - by mikesok988 (man) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, my boyfriend reckoned that he has a better sleep when he falls asleep with his hand on either my boobs or my ass. I kind of just laughed it off. I later discovered he's 100% correct when he put his hand on my butt, and not five minutes later was snoring. FML

#21217074
8 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40190) - you deserved it (6571)

On 07/22/2014 at 4:44am - love - by and the truth comes out (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while cooking, I managed to burn my finger. I quickly turned the tap on and ran my finger under cold water, but apparently someone had just used the hot tap, because boiling water flooded out onto my nicely scalded finger. FML

#20017932
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20063) - you deserved it (2656)

On 08/13/2012 at 12:43am - misc - by burnt (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, it was the hottest day of the year so I opened my sun roof. The hottest day of the year was followed by the biggest storm of the year. I forgot to close my sun roof and my car is now flooded. FML

#10815057
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11215) - you deserved it (27991)

On 05/28/2010 at 2:20am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, my fiancé broke off our engagement after he saw one of my baby pictures. He said our future kids just wouldn't look right. FML

#16976984
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40015) - you deserved it (3128)

On 07/04/2011 at 7:42pm - kids - by K3you - United States (Florida)

Today, a bee landed on my leg. I didn't realize it was there until my friend yelled out, "Bee!" kicked me in the leg, and ran off. I fell to the ground screaming and clutching my leg. She missed the bee and it still stung me. FML

#10837564
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26072) - you deserved it (2364)

On 05/29/2010 at 8:11am - misc - by hulagirl1217 (woman) - United States (California)

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