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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Today, I was on the phone with Microsoft Customer Service for about a total of 2 hours. That's the longest I've ever talked to anybody. FML

#17700838 (102)

I agree, your life sucks (15326) - you deserved it (2639)

On 09/08/2011 at 11:30pm - misc - by Juicy12Jham - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to the House of Horrors at Universal Studios. People dressed up as monsters would jump at us, and I was so freaked out that I tripped. My equally terrified mom fell on top of me. Frankenstein's monster was nice enough to ask us if we were alright. FML

#17565538 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (4868) - you deserved it (4347)

On 08/24/2011 at 2:32am - misc - by Trimacle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom made me teach my delusional gran web browsing. I barely made it to YouTube before she sneered at me, and told me to "stop pissing about before I smash your face in." Two hours and multiple slaps later, she still doesn't get what a URL is, and I fear for my life. FML

#17783230 (146)

I agree, your life sucks (17405) - you deserved it (1706)

On 09/19/2011 at 8:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to a haunted show restaurant. I needed the toilet badly, but they were inside the building, which could only be gotten to via a ghost train. The footage of me peeing myself in terror on the train was played on a big screen inside, in front of a crowd of onlookers. FML

#15039071 (100)

I agree, your life sucks (20203) - you deserved it (3188)

On 02/19/2011 at 10:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I swam in a race against all of the girls in the midwest in the hardest, longest, most grueling race you can swim. I won. Happy but so tired I could barely move, I looked up to see my time. I had been disqualified. For flinching. Before the race started. FML

#1054756 (205)

I agree, your life sucks (62345) - you deserved it (4256)

On 04/17/2009 at 1:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my identical twin sister got in trouble for sneaking out of the house to see her boyfriend. My father decided to ground both of us, because it would be "too confusing" for him otherwise. FML

#16057937 (225)

I agree, your life sucks (1404) - you deserved it (1556)

On 05/05/2011 at 5:04pm - kids - by Monika (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me on my Facebook wall. 27 people liked it. FML

#17097344 (175)

I agree, your life sucks (34090) - you deserved it (4210)

On 07/13/2011 at 6:01pm - love - by 30Jenna - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my entire family came over for thanksgiving. It went pretty well, only four family members got in a fist fight and only one cop car was called. FML

#18341850 (87)

I agree, your life sucks (7640) - you deserved it (541)

On 11/24/2011 at 9:49pm - misc - by guy - United States

Today, a girl came into my salon to permanently straighten her really long and curly hair. After several long hours, I went to the counter to charge her. She ran out faster than an Olympic runner. FML

#17473722 (153)

I agree, your life sucks (12140) - you deserved it (715)

On 08/14/2011 at 8:47pm - work - by theultimatesalonfail - United States

Today, I noticed my 5-gallon glass vase/aquarium was leaking at the base. When I went to move the vase so I could transfer everything to a new aquarium, the bottom completely detached, sending water, sand, sea shells and fish crap everywhere. FML

#18499950 (82)

I agree, your life sucks (6966) - you deserved it (1433)

On 12/13/2011 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, on my flight to Vegas, I was wishing that a really cute guy would come sit in the seat next to mine. A few minutes later, a really cute guy sat in the seat next to me and even started to talk to me. When I said, "I like rugged men." he said "Oh ya, me too! I really like buff guys also." FML

#831202 (158)

I agree, your life sucks (53910) - you deserved it (8187)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:40am - love - by vela9002 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had a panic attack. Not on a crowded train, or an airplane, or in school, or any of the expected places. It was in my yoga class, which my therapist recommended for me, while I was in a dead-body position. FML

#18174225 (106)

I agree, your life sucks (16920) - you deserved it (2287)

On 11/06/2011 at 12:43pm - health - by panickygrl (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I tried to quit my job. My boss just looked at me and said, "No. You can't quit." FML

#7414727 (129)

I agree, your life sucks (21011) - you deserved it (4586)

On 01/18/2010 at 3:28am - work - by toolegittoquit (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was talking to a female friend online. She was typing out a story bit by bit about how awful she was feeling after being teased. I was responding with "So, so true" but because of my slow typing it appeared after she wrote, "Doesn't help being fat." FML

#7927538 (89)

I agree, your life sucks (17473) - you deserved it (3772)

On 02/06/2010 at 3:17am - misc - by Oops (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was texting this cute guy that I like. After a couple of minutes I get a missed call from him, I call back and his girlfriend answers and says "Hi this is his girlfriend, please stop calling him". FML

#6612429 (64)

I agree, your life sucks (8206) - you deserved it (17355)

On 12/05/2009 at 3:44am - love - by JennyAndrews (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)

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