Today, I was alone in the house at night when I almost died of fright after seeing a woman staring at me through the window. I screamed before realizing that she was just my reflection. FML

By Anonymous - / Monday 29 May 2017 17:44 / Venezuela - Barquisimeto
By Anonymous - / Sunday 18 June 2017 19:06 / India - Vijayawada
By Anonymous - / Monday 29 May 2017 17:41 / Argentina
FML - The follow-up
C8H18 Say more :
OP, here. Being a small town of 200 hundred people there's really not much information when I did searches. Even the realistate agent didn't mention it. I've found that the tourists only know if it because they live in the sourrounding cities a few hours away and simply searched for lakes in the area. Unfortunately this "lake" they're vacationing to isn't really a lake. It's a man made reservoir for...
By Save Me - / Friday 16 June 2017 06:15 /
FML - The follow-up

Today, my mother won two tickets in the Hamilton ticket lottery. My siblings joked that we would finally find out who the favorite child is. Who ended up going to the show? My two sisters. FML

Druu Say more :
OP here! I finally got an FML published -- wooo! [Gimme them badges! I should have two gold ones coming my way!] I'm the eldest child, and I already made plans to go fishing that night, so I wasn't really in contention anyway. (Though I would gladly have abandoned those plans if it didn't mean bailing on someone else.) As for which Hamilton, the REAL one on Broadway. :-P I did consider offering a bribe...
By Druu - / Monday 5 June 2017 05:42 /
FML - The follow-up

Today, I woke up hungover, locked in my bathroom. This wouldn't be a problem, except in my drunken stupor, I snapped the key. I live alone and there's no windows. FML

UberAwesone Say more :
OP here, I live in Indonesia, and most bathrooms here have seperate keys instead of a toggle. Thankfully, my brother has a spare house key, I was able to call him over and get him to call a locksmith to get me out. I posted this FML while we were waiting for the locksmith to come by.
By UberAwesone - / Saturday 17 June 2017 18:29 / Indonesia - Jakarta
FML - The follow-up
Nightlark Say more :
Hey, OP here. Basically, I made a joke. I've just got back from uni so I'm not used to hiding parts of myself (I don't have to hide it around my mum cause she likes to pretend it doesn't exist). My nan was talking about me getting married, saying I needed to find Mr right. I made a joke about it being Mrs Right without thinking and here we are.
By Trappedinthecloset - / Friday 16 June 2017 01:11 /
By Roma - / Monday 12 June 2017 18:48 / United States - Chevy Chase
By shortarse - / Friday 9 June 2017 16:25 / Australia - Saint Lucia

Today, I found out that I was a father, that my son is married, that his wife is pregnant, and that he and his wife would like me to take care of their eldest son during the end stages of the pregnancy. FML

By Anonymous - / Monday 29 May 2017 17:06 / France
By Jailbird - / Thursday 8 June 2017 06:05 / United States - Redmond
By KillMeNow - / Wednesday 7 June 2017 22:56 / United States - Houston
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