Today, for the fourth time this week, I witnessed my mother dancing around the house naked. Apparently, she is loosening up her "inner nudist" and isn't planning on stopping any time soon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4235) - you deserved it (375)
On 05/22/2013 at 6:56am - misc - by stillhave2years - United States
Today I returned home after a semester at university. I guess I did too good a job of getting into shape as my parents phoned the police, thinking I was a burglar. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4412) - you deserved it (407)
On 05/22/2013 at 5:44am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, while grieving over the loss of my Grandpa, I called my girlfriend for comfort. After I had cheered up, she said, "Don't worry, he went to Hell anyway." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10470) - you deserved it (702)
On 05/22/2013 at 3:14am - misc - by SadPuppy - United States
Today, due to my allergies I can't stop sneezing. It wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't for my hemorrhoids making each sneeze feel like I'm getting a cactus shoved up my ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9411) - you deserved it (739)
On 05/22/2013 at 1:38am - health - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my neighbors called the police and said that they saw, through the window, a suspicious person in my house doing something to my piano. The "suspicious person" was me, in my own house, playing my own piano. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12270) - you deserved it (725)
On 05/21/2013 at 9:57pm - misc - by pianoplayer (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I had to go with my mom to the gynecologist to translate due to her broken English. As we were filling out papers and answering questions, the doctor asked some very personal questions. I now know everything about my mom's sex life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13215) - you deserved it (1310)
On 05/21/2013 at 8:10pm - intimacy - by knowtoomuch - United States (Colorado)
Today, and throughout the past week, my electricity, water, cable, and Internet were progressively shut off. Why? Because my deranged mother-in-law has been stealing the money orders I use to pay my bills out of my mailbox. She also stole the late notices because she didn't want me to be "mad". FML
I agree, your life sucks (13035) - you deserved it (778)
On 05/21/2013 at 6:47pm - money - by LightsOut - United States (Florida)
Today, I was getting out of my car, when my new neighbor asked if I'd help him unhitch a trailer. On my way over, he said, "Oh never mind, I thought you were a boy." I am a boy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26208) - you deserved it (3680)
On 05/21/2013 at 3:05pm - misc - by Time for a haircut (man) - United States
Today, my mom scolded me and threatened to ground me for coming home past midnight. Normally, it wouldn't be unreasonable, except for the fact that I'm 24 years old, and that my parents live with me, in my own house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28821) - you deserved it (2565)
On 05/21/2013 at 2:30pm - misc - by mammasboy - United States (Illinois)
↑ mylifeisgreat9's comment : Kick them out. They seem like terrible people
Today, while on my way to an important interview, I was stopped and ticketed for speeding. The ticket made me 20 minutes late, but when I showed up, I was told they forgot to call and let me know that the woman I was supposed to meet with called in sick this morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23840) - you deserved it (4020)
On 05/21/2013 at 1:20pm - misc - by psuedodragon (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate in the backseat of his car, when a police car pulled up behind us. My mom later told me that intimacy was fine, just not in a car. We were in the car because she told me that intimacy was fine, just not in her house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24250) - you deserved it (5789)
On 05/21/2013 at 12:09pm - intimacy - by backseatbusted (woman) - United States
Today, I thought the public restroom I was in was empty, so I started rapping. I realized the room was not empty when, recognizing the song, the person one stall over joined in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17233) - you deserved it (25687)
On 05/21/2013 at 11:01am - misc - by crappingrapping - United States
↑ Welshite's comment : As weird as it sounds, I really wish I had been there.
Today, while at a concert, I stepped into a restroom to use my nasal spray since my allergies were acting up. Apparently, someone thought that I had been snorting coke in the stall. I was escorted outside and had to wait for the cops until I could explain everything. I missed the headliner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28866) - you deserved it (1918)
On 05/21/2013 at 7:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
↑ flockz's comment : "yes 911. my neighbor is fingering some minors in his living room."
See all the comments →