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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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The Illustrated FML

Today, I went on a 7-hour plane flight. For 3 hours I had a bloody nose. When it finally stopped, I sneezed. It started to bleed again. FML

#19697122 (31)

I agree, your life sucks (157) - you deserved it (19)

On 05/29/2012 at 1:14am - health - by Ella - United States

Today, I had to teach my younger brother to shave with a regular disposable razor because our dad uses an electric one and I'm the only other person in the family with enough facial hair to know know to use a razor. I probably would have been proud if I wasn't a girl. FML

#19696730 (59)

I agree, your life sucks (520) - you deserved it (33)

On 05/29/2012 at 12:06am - kids - by The Bearded Woman (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out where my surprise honeymoon is; it involves swimming with dolphins. I have a huge fear of dolphins, whales and sharks. FML

#19696496 (82)

I agree, your life sucks (803) - you deserved it (173)

On 05/28/2012 at 11:36pm - misc - by SwimmingInFear - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to visit my husband's grave. I was unable to mourn in peace because some teenagers were smoking pot and talking about a government conspiracy "to change the way gravity works" on the next grave over. FML

#19696168 (70)

I agree, your life sucks (1423) - you deserved it (47)

On 05/28/2012 at 10:51pm - misc - by notnicefools - United States (California)

Today, I admitted to my parents that I have an eating disorder. Instead of trying to help, my mom stared at me and said, "Duh". FML

#19695634 (67)

I agree, your life sucks (825) - you deserved it (152)

On 05/28/2012 at 9:38pm - misc - by Hungrey - United States

Today, my son was fired from his new job, which was going to support us since I recently lost mine. His excuse was, "Conflict of interest." He was a mascot for a fast-food restaurant and refused to dance around. FML

#19694666 (69)

I agree, your life sucks (1998) - you deserved it (1015)

On 05/28/2012 at 6:00pm - kids - by Shianna (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I came to the realisation that the longest relationship I've had by far is the one I have with my hemorrhoids. FML

#19694480 (60)

I agree, your life sucks (1746) - you deserved it (261)

On 05/28/2012 at 5:17pm - health - by Phil (man) - Canada

Today, at my job as a lifeguard, I told a teenager to, "Walk please." He then threw his soda at me as he ran away. We aren't allowed off stand unless it's an emergency, so I baked in that soda for 30 minutes. FML

#19692881 (170)

I agree, your life sucks (3492) - you deserved it (326)

On 05/28/2012 at 10:05am - work - by emonsteadman - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a $20 tip from an old lady I delivered pizza to. Ecstatic, I walked back to my car where there was a $30 parking fine waiting for me. FML

#19692840 (94)

I agree, your life sucks (2987) - you deserved it (878)

On 05/28/2012 at 9:55am - money - by dammit33 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my parents think it's so hot outside that it's okay for them to work in the garden naked. FML

#19692459 (161)

I agree, your life sucks (3023) - you deserved it (305)

On 05/28/2012 at 6:15am - misc - by Ladieda (woman) - Netherlands (Gelderland)

Today, while I was waiting to pull out of a parking space, my boyfriend decided it would be funny to put the car into reverse instead of drive while I was waiting for traffic to clear. I don't think the people who own the car behind me were laughing. Nor is my now ex-boyfriend. FML

#19692417 (161)

I agree, your life sucks (4250) - you deserved it (431)

On 05/28/2012 at 5:38am - misc - by Broke (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out that the person who has been stalking me has also been stalking someone else. I got upset. It seems it took being stalked to make me feel good about myself. FML

#19692066 (106)

I agree, your life sucks (1068) - you deserved it (2271)

On 05/28/2012 at 2:24am - love - by stalked (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while at the mall, a kid no older than 5 pushed a stroller into my heel, which caught the back of my shoe and caused me to face-plant the floor in the middle of a very crowded department store. I didn't even get an apology. FML

#19691716 (71)

I agree, your life sucks (3481) - you deserved it (314)

On 05/28/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Anon - United States



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