Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I was pulled over and fined $100 for driving without a license, as I'd accidentally left home without my wallet. I later found my wallet wedged beside my car seat, where it had been the entire time. FML

#21288966
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9118) - you deserved it (1509)

On 10/31/2014 at 9:35am - money - by emptypockets - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, we told my fiancé's parents that I'm pregnant. His mom's response? "I'm going to throw up. You can't raise a child." We are both 28, self-sufficient and everyone else is thrilled. FML

#21288954
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9088) - you deserved it (734)

On 10/31/2014 at 8:58am - kids - by kimmykins27 (woman) - United States

Today, as I was walking home from work, I got chased halfway home by a wolf. Yes, a wolf. I live in central Norway. FML

#21288944
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9484) - you deserved it (675)

On 10/31/2014 at 8:31am - animals - by noxiffic (man) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I woke up really early to get ready for an interview. I guess it was too early because my mom thought someone broke into our house and now I have two bruised ribs. FML

#21288937
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8412) - you deserved it (627)

On 10/31/2014 at 8:05am - misc - by nopethanks - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend told my four-year-old sister that "fatass" means "beautiful lady." I didn't know about this until I took my sister shopping with me. The woman at the till said she was adorable; my sister replied, "Thanks, fatass." FML

#21288917
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9110) - you deserved it (742)

On 10/31/2014 at 6:55am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff)

Today, my friend thought she would "save me some time" by spoiling Game of Thrones. FML

#21288916
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11001) - you deserved it (1426)

On 10/31/2014 at 6:46am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, the fire alarm keeps going off at my apartment. Not only is the noise ear-piercingly loud enough to wake the entire neighbourhood, there's also a big flashing red light in case the deafening sound isn't enough. This is my day off. It's going on all day. FML

#21288915
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10061) - you deserved it (811)

On 10/31/2014 at 6:42am - misc - by Shutup! - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I came to the conclusion I have three kids instead of two, after having to force my husband to take a shower. It's been a week. FML

#21288837
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12017) - you deserved it (1143)

On 10/31/2014 at 1:10am - health - by NoScrubs - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the girl on Facebook that helped me out of my sadness after my break-up and who I'd hopelessly fallen in love with was just a prank by my ex-girlfriend. FML

#21288808
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13907) - you deserved it (1594)

On 10/31/2014 at 12:25am - love - by facebookdeception - New Zealand (Auckland)

doumtabarnack's comment : That evil bitch.

See all the comments →

Today, my ex-girlfriend started dating the guy she told me not to worry about when we dated. FML

#21288806
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17347) - you deserved it (1699)

On 10/31/2014 at 12:24am - love - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found out the guy I've been dating for 5 months is engaged to his girlfriend of 3 years. I found out as we were talking, waiting for him to come outside after work. FML

#21288734
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16142) - you deserved it (1222)

On 10/30/2014 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by taylor w - United States

JonBall's comment : If she hasn't done so herself, I suggest the both of you dump his ass.

See all the comments →

Today, my now ex-boyfriend actually tried to justify his cheating by saying it doesn't count as cheating if the girl's bisexual. FML

#21288568
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21943) - you deserved it (1686)

On 10/30/2014 at 6:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, my mom spelled my name with all lowercase letters. When I asked her why she wrote it like that, she got pissed and snapped back, "Capitals are for people who amount to something." FML

#21288559
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21101) - you deserved it (2239)

On 10/30/2014 at 6:05pm - misc - by wow (man) - United States (California)

devildog562's comment : Your mom sucks. Notice mom is lowercased.

See all the comments →



FML's blog

  • On FML, it's Halloween every day
  • As you know, we never pass up the chance to open up a light beer and plunge into the depths of the FML archive to come up with some sort of theme. Most holidays, national or otherwise, are pretty well represented.…

Friday 31 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: