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Today, my boss admitted she's having an affair. She's married to my brother. FML

#21415827
5 comments

I agree, your life sucks (102) - you deserved it (10)

On 05/25/2015 at 11:50pm - work - by tmi4me - United States

Today, one of my regulars came up to my car in the parking lot. We talked through the window while I put on my makeup. He then asked for a hug because he won't be in for two weeks. I obliged and he was kind enough to slide his hand between my legs. He then gave me $50 not to tell his wife. FML

#21415790
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (941) - you deserved it (131)

On 05/25/2015 at 10:50pm - work - by witchybaby89 - United States

Today, at work, I dropped two bottles of wine on the floor. Unbelievably, they both didn't break. That, however, did not stop my boss from taking a few points away on my evaluation. My $3 raise is now reduced to $0.25. FML

#21415769
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1255) - you deserved it (162)

On 05/25/2015 at 10:26pm - work - by A1NoSauce - United States (Florida)

Today, I was wrestling in a tournament. I was in the finals about to win when the kid threw up on me. They thought I'd hit him in the the stomach hard enough to make him throw up, so they disqualified me. FML

#21415763
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4117) - you deserved it (272)

On 05/25/2015 at 10:24pm - misc - by wrestling probs - United States

Today, I tried to work on my attitude at work. People say I'm mean, so I tried to be nice all day. Apparently I'm now condescending. FML

#21415518
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5112) - you deserved it (771)

On 05/25/2015 at 1:42pm - work - by Frustrated - United States

Today, I woke up in my living room after having a party. I then realized my fish tank with many different species was missing from its usual spot. After searching for a few minutes, I finally found it in the freezer. FML

#21415477
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15161) - you deserved it (4078)

On 05/25/2015 at 12:10pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Jord_Fox's comment : Your fish are cool

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Today, after a broken smoke detector in my home caused the fire department to come, I got an angry visit from my neighbor who was upset because she had parked in front of a fire hydrant and got a ticket. She demands that I pay it, "or else." FML

#21415473
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18226) - you deserved it (1312)

On 05/25/2015 at 12:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

theTravinator's comment : Just ignore her, she can't do anything about it and it's her own damn fault

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Today, while sick with the flu, I had the police called on me by my older neighbors downstairs. They thought I was hosting a party at 3 in the morning. I was really just throwing up constantly. FML

#21415404
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16260) - you deserved it (967)

On 05/25/2015 at 7:39am - health - by Hooperist (man) - United States (California)

Today, I saw my uncle, whom I have not seen in five years, at a family gathering. His reaction to seeing me? "Holy SHIT you have BOOBS! The guys must be all over you!" I awkwardly replied, "No..." Then he muttered, "I know I would." FML

igg125's comment : He was either drunk or is a pervert.

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Today, my dog was knocked unconscious. I had to race him to the vet and pay a small fortune for x-rays and shots. All because he ran into the kitchen at full speed and smashed headfirst into the refrigerator after hearing me open a bag of turkey. FML

Today, my housemates are throwing a huge house party to celebrate finishing their finals. It's 4:30am and people are still arriving. I have my last final in 3 hours. FML

#21415194
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20159) - you deserved it (1458)

On 05/24/2015 at 9:59pm - misc - by Party Pooper - United States

Today, I got so used to using this FML app while going to the bathroom that when I opened it, I accidentally peed a little. FML

#21415171
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18635) - you deserved it (7367)

On 05/24/2015 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, I realized that my relationship has hit a new low when I made an appointment with my girlfriend to have sex. I have a two week wait. FML

#21415031
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19096) - you deserved it (2842)

On 05/24/2015 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by ugh - United States (Michigan)



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