Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, the power in my village went out. This caused the back-up battery powered alarm to go off. Nobody in the house even knew our alarm worked, let alone how to make it stop. It's been going off for over an hour now. FML

#21524147
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1569) - you deserved it (143)

On 02/08/2016 at 5:55pm - misc - by James (man) - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I finally found out why my graphics card in my PC had been overheating recently. My brother disconnected the card's fan because it was too loud when he was gaming. I guess I can always spend another $750. FML

#21524086
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11891) - you deserved it (906)

On 02/08/2016 at 2:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

TimTheFish's comment : I guess right now you aren't his biggest fan.

See all the comments →

Today, I made a delicious casserole for dinner. Just as I was about to serve it, a bowl fell from the cupboard above, exploded on the counter and made it rain tiny, sharp glass shards on my food. I can't pick them all out. FML

#21524037
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10935) - you deserved it (930)

On 02/08/2016 at 12:43pm - misc - by Anonymous - Austria

Today, I was asked to prove that I was Chinese by translating the phrase, "Ching chong ming chang ho". I'm not even Chinese. FML

#21523696
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15533) - you deserved it (1205)

On 02/07/2016 at 2:03pm - misc - by Asian - United States (South Carolina)

Bree06's comment : Should've told them it translates to 'don't be such a dickhead'

See all the comments →

Today, I saw my grandfather on the train, with his cock out. FML

#21523681
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16407) - you deserved it (1198)

On 02/07/2016 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by OhDearGodGrandad (man) - United Kingdom (Redbridge)

Dave_Davington's comment : You should take yours out too just so he doesn't feel alone.

See all the comments →

Today, for the seventh weekend in a row, I left my weekly visit with my long-distance boyfriend unsatisfied. Seems he enjoys getting shit-faced drunk more than he enjoys getting a boner. FML

#21523668
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14502) - you deserved it (2224)

On 02/07/2016 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by noO (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, the only thing that kept me hard during sex with my wife was thinking about my own naked body. FML

#21523607
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15947) - you deserved it (5532)

On 02/07/2016 at 4:17am - intimacy - by weirdoe (man) - Italy (Sicilia)

Today, while working third shift alone at a gas station, I had to deal with a crazy guy tripping balls and asking me if it was okay to bring a gun into the place. I don't get paid nearly enough for this. FML

#21523593
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15973) - you deserved it (1165)

On 02/07/2016 at 2:49am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, barely 2 hours into a 5 hour car ride home, my mom accidentally let slip that she's been cheating on my dad. I had to sit with the bitch in a diner for ages while my dad bawled his eyes out alone in the car. FML

#21523579
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20530) - you deserved it (1053)

On 02/07/2016 at 1:11am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found out that my university had not accepted the internship I did when I was in college. They placed me in the same bank I interned in, with the same bank manager that I flipped the middle finger at after finishing my internship. FML

#21523525
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10104) - you deserved it (20898)

On 02/06/2016 at 10:36pm - work - by FailingMyCourse - Kuwait (Al Kuwayt)

Today, I was forced to get up in front of ten swim teams, including my own, and a hundred spectators to swim 100 yards with an obvious boner sticking out of my suit. FML

#21523419
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18832) - you deserved it (3258)

On 02/06/2016 at 3:52pm - intimacy - by notagoodtime - United States (California)

Today, after a snowstorm my son decided that boarding off the roof onto my truck would be fun. My truck now has a puncture wound. The same truck that drove him to the hospital for his puncture wound and broken arm. FML

#21523317
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16562) - you deserved it (1458)

On 02/06/2016 at 6:56am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I heard a noise in my garage so I grabbed a baseball bat and went to look. The skunk I stirred was actually better armed than me. FML

#21523316
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15735) - you deserved it (1548)

On 02/06/2016 at 6:42am - animals - by moosemay (woman) - Germany (Bayern)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: