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Today, my coworker and me announced that we are spending our holidays together, because we both have kids. My boss announced he is coming with us. FML

#21303728
9 comments

I agree, your life sucks (431) - you deserved it (55)

On 11/22/2014 at 5:16am - work - by Carnage23 (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I noticed my fish was still hungry after feeding him earlier. I figured "ehh a little bit more won't kill him". I was wrong. FML

#21303699
8 comments

I agree, your life sucks (420) - you deserved it (130)

On 11/22/2014 at 2:22am - animals - by liishax3 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was studying for my Spanish midterm nonstop. After I closed my book, I was so tired that I thought that my cat was asking me questions in Spanish. FML

#21303629
8 comments

I agree, your life sucks (413) - you deserved it (48)

On 11/21/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Studying is for crazy people. - United States (California)

Today, my five year old sister won't stop saying, "shit buckle fuckle ton." My boyfriend's excuse was that he was teaching her how to rhyme. FML

#21303585
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3817) - you deserved it (340)

On 11/21/2014 at 10:29pm - kids - by angkal2002 - Australia

Today, I went to the doctor's with my pregnant sister, only to find out she still weighs less than me. FML

#21303583
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3863) - you deserved it (887)

On 11/21/2014 at 10:26pm - health - by alli67 -

Today, I learned that if life gives you lemons, your sister is going to squeeze them over your face while you take a nap on the couch. FML

#21303546
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6817) - you deserved it (487)

On 11/21/2014 at 9:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I asked my dad if he thought my dress was nice, and if guys would go for me. He replied, "Shit, depends on how drunk they are." FML

#21303377
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18252) - you deserved it (2323)

On 11/21/2014 at 3:07pm - misc - by Veronica - United States (California)

Today, the girl I'd been dating online for 6 months told me she was a guy. I said it was alright, and that I was still in love. Then she confessed she really was a girl, and was just trying to make me dump her so she wouldn't be the "bad guy". FML

#21303306
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19926) - you deserved it (3670)

On 11/21/2014 at 1:18pm - love - by Recluse (man) -

WhoopteDo's comment : honestly it works out for you in the end, you got out of a relationship with a pretty shallow girl there, couldn't even be honest with you over the internet.. fyl

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Today, I realized that having an open relationship isn't all that great, when my boyfriend hooked up with his ex and dumped me for her. FML

#21303284
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15292) - you deserved it (9050)

On 11/21/2014 at 11:56am - love - by openended - United States (California)

MrConcise's comment : A relationship is like a circle. When a circle is open, it's not a circle anymore.

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Today, I was selling winter-themed cookies at my university. I cheerfully asked a girl if she would like to buy cookies to support peer tutoring. Her response? "I don't eat food." FML

#21303227
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21268) - you deserved it (2240)

On 11/21/2014 at 8:51am - misc - by UTRejected (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was getting to second base with a really hot guy, but I couldn't stop laughing when he said my boobs were "soft like cake." He got so embarrassed that he lost his boner. FML

#21303170
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21492) - you deserved it (5844)

On 11/21/2014 at 4:56am - intimacy - by weirdthingtosay (woman) - United States (Washington)

horneyhic's comment : So "help" him get it back

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Today, my boss flipped me off in traffic on my way to work. FML

#21303116
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20834) - you deserved it (2407)

On 11/21/2014 at 1:11am - work - by TJ AJ RJ / IV the V - United States (California)

Today, I was rock climbing. I had my equipment on and I saw a really cute girl. I went for the hardest climb in the gym, and while jumping up to grab the rock, I simultaneously farted, missed the rock, fell to the mat and broke my arm in the process. FML

#21303024
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22915) - you deserved it (10289)

On 11/20/2014 at 10:25pm - misc - by AOart1st (man) - United States (California)



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