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Today, we spent the day with my grandmother. During a family conversation,, my sweet little grandmother looked me up and down, and without any hesitation said, "I remember you being so beautiful," before looking at my mother, mouthing, "What happened?" and laughing. She's 87. FML

#21307421
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3694) - you deserved it (322)

On 11/28/2014 at 7:16am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, I finished watching an entire movie after boarding the plane, before the plane even took off. FML

#21307360
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5728) - you deserved it (453)

On 11/28/2014 at 3:00am - misc - by stampslife - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after Thanksgiving dinner, we all played Cards Against Humanity. On one round, I was the dealer, and I received "foreskin" as a card. When I said this, my grandmother told me that apparently, after my ritual circumcision, my grandfather buried my foreskin under our rosebushes. FML

#21307273
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7592) - you deserved it (740)

On 11/28/2014 at 12:25am - misc - by mainlineloser (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to celebrate Thanksgiving with my family. I watched as my uncle and his girlfriend snuck off to the bathroom together, where they stayed until someone else tried to get in. When they came out, she was wiping her mouth. I need new eyes. FML

#21306928
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19029) - you deserved it (1566)

On 11/27/2014 at 3:38pm - intimacy - by Trainer Calypso - United States (Wisconsin)

Googolman's comment : Maybe it was her way of saying thanks.

See all the comments →

Today, some idiot introduced my grandmother to yoga pants. FML

#21306857
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18360) - you deserved it (1719)

On 11/27/2014 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I realised I was far too attached to my duvet. Literally. I just got a large tattoo on my back, and my duvet somehow stuck to my skin during the night and formed part of the scab. I now have the joy of deciding whether to tear it off fast or peel it away slowly. FML

#21306764
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14597) - you deserved it (3183)

On 11/27/2014 at 11:30am - health - by Dramori -

Today, I farted while asking a girl out to dinner. FML

#21306727
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20192) - you deserved it (3896)

On 11/27/2014 at 10:13am - love - by fart - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to end a first date with the words, "You can get out of my car and go upstairs yourself, or I can come around and drag you out, bring you up the stairs, and knock on your door," because he'd gotten completely plastered in a span of about three hours. And yes, I had to drag him. FML

Today, I finally got time to take a nap. Later, my mom asked me if I was depressed because I didn't leave my room for 3 hours. She talked to my dad about it, and now my family thinks I'm depressed because I slept for 3 hours. FML

#21306606
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21130) - you deserved it (1574)

On 11/27/2014 at 2:06am - misc - by Sleep. - United States (Missouri)

Today, I thought I'd lost the ring that my boyfriend had given me, in the snow, in the dark. I spent a half hour with a flashlight searching every part of my driveway. The ring was on my kitchen windowsill the whole time. I took it off earlier to do dishes. FML

#21306486
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19031) - you deserved it (4636)

On 11/26/2014 at 10:33pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, it was my turn to open the bar I work at. As I walked into our terrace, I found our insane upstairs neighbour leaving the scene without a word. This was right before I spotted the steaming pile of dung she'd left behind. FML

#21306439
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18757) - you deserved it (1299)

On 11/26/2014 at 9:04pm - work - by caterinette - Portugal

Today, my mother requested that I return the $500 she had previously given me to help me pay for college. Her reasoning? "You work three jobs, you can afford it." I work three jobs because she decided buying herself a car was more important than my schooling. FML



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