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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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The Illustrated FML

Today, I was sick, so I emailed my co-workers with a list of my hours, asking if anyone would be willing to cover them for me. I only got one hour covered, and that was during a day I don't even work. FML

#19026476 (101)

I agree, your life sucks (1788) - you deserved it (223)

On 02/08/2012 at 1:46pm - work - by Girl With a Cold (woman) -

Today, we got a new seating arrangement in my science class. I'm now sitting between two people who have spent the last 20 minutes whispering dirty things to one another. FML

#19026330 (112)

I agree, your life sucks (2049) - you deserved it (173)

On 02/08/2012 at 1:15pm - love - by Anonymous -

Today, I accidentally dropped a sculpture at college, and it broke. Some weirdo wearing a pink cape and a fake moustache bitched me out and told me not to be such an attention-seeking drama queen. FML

#19026244 (106)

I agree, your life sucks (2610) - you deserved it (300)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was attacked by a bird at 3 in the morning. The bird was being attacked by an owl, and decided the safest place to land wasn't in a tree, but my face. No-one will believe me, despite the 12 stitches across my face. FML

#19026198 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (2438) - you deserved it (153)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:45pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I got denied a job because they told me I was unreliable because I didn't show up for my third interview. This is the same interview they called and cancelled this morning. FML

#19025988 (68)

I agree, your life sucks (3471) - you deserved it (169)

On 02/08/2012 at 11:53am - work - by abrooks88 - United States

Today, I had to get my picture taken for a badge at the hospital. My sister came home and told my parents that she'd had a horrible day at work. They showed her my "hysterical" badge picture to cheer her up. FML

#19025712 (36)

I agree, your life sucks (2646) - you deserved it (256)

On 02/08/2012 at 10:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I sneaked off work early. As I was in the elevator on the way down to leave, it stopped at my boss's floor, and he got in. FML

#19025200 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (619) - you deserved it (4994)

On 02/08/2012 at 8:26am - work - by ronz -

Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend got engaged to a co-worker. I got her the job. FML

#19025150 (99)

I agree, your life sucks (3246) - you deserved it (496)

On 02/08/2012 at 8:08am - love - by D-Man (man) - United States

Today, I bought my mother an apple pie. She made a face at it and said that she'd decided to go on a diet. After I'd left the house, she put it in the oven, forgot about it, and burnt it to a crisp. She then called me up to inform me that I'd wasted my money, and to get her "another damn pie." FML

#19024888 (81)

I agree, your life sucks (3542) - you deserved it (202)

On 02/08/2012 at 6:27am - misc - by 3.14 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend came over to my parents' house for dinner. My dad made Holocaust jokes the entire time. My boyfriend is Jewish. FML

#19023656 (46)

I agree, your life sucks (4970) - you deserved it (502)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:17am - love - by daughterofanazi (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I caught my boyfriend trying on my bra. He still has no excuse. FML

#19023542 (138)

I agree, your life sucks (3703) - you deserved it (588)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:04am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, my dad finally met my girlfriend. Unfortunately, he was driving the ambulance that she was in, due to severe alcohol poisoning and was on the way to the hospital to have her stomach pumped. FML

#19021363 (80)

I agree, your life sucks (3890) - you deserved it (1184)

On 02/07/2012 at 8:40pm - health - by screwed - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I texted my flatmate to ask him when he would be paying his portion of the rent, since he has told me he would be late this month. He wrote back to inform me that he had moved out last night while I was away, and that he won't be paying me anything. FML

#19020583 (58)

I agree, your life sucks (4550) - you deserved it (371)

On 02/07/2012 at 7:14pm - money - by oceangirl - United States