Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, as a volunteer tutor, I met up with a girl who needed help with calculus. When I introduced myself, she wrinkled up her face and said, "I'd hoped you'd be hotter." FML

#21344749
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3507) - you deserved it (224)

On 01/26/2015 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I'm at the unique point in my schooling that I'm either extremely overqualified or extremely underqualified for every job opportunity that appeals to me. FML

#21344707
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3974) - you deserved it (337)

On 01/26/2015 at 7:19pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized why you should never wear a thong under yoga pants that are a couple of sizes too small. It's a weird thing, seeing your co-workers anus. FML

#21344664
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4403) - you deserved it (462)

On 01/26/2015 at 6:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I mentioned to my girlfriend that I sent in a job application after she went home. In front of her parents. Who thought she'd stayed the night at a friend's place. FML

#21344632
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4687) - you deserved it (1656)

On 01/26/2015 at 5:30pm - misc - by Ruhroh (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, all day, in a huge blizzard, I've been stuck with a very nice, but very ugly, toothless and rather large and somewhat smelly woman, who has been continuously saying, "It feels like we're dating. Doesn't it feel like we're dating?" Ugh. No, no it doesn't. And please don't kill me. FML

#21344628
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5114) - you deserved it (521)

On 01/26/2015 at 5:19pm - misc - by Yellow an (man) - United States

Today, after putting a bag of dirty laundry in the laundry room to wait for an open washer, I came back to find a "free stuff" sign on all of my expensive jeans, new towels, and favorite sweatshirts. The bag was over half empty. FML

#21344550
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13254) - you deserved it (6291)

On 01/26/2015 at 2:17pm - misc - by boogery - United States

UmmOkThen's comment : Don't leave your stuff in the laundry room, that's like rule number one. It's a hard lesson, but I bet you won't make that mistake again.

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Today, I got a cute girl's number for the first time. Too bad it was because she rear ended my car. FML

#21344494
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12494) - you deserved it (1189)

On 01/26/2015 at 10:48am - misc - by Anonomous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my cat had the bright idea of giving birth in the dryer, on top of all my new white towels. FML

#21344486
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12533) - you deserved it (2598)

On 01/26/2015 at 10:21am - animals - by HannaMD - Canada

arachnophile's comment : Actually it sounds like the cat DID have a pretty good idea and found a soft, warm place to do it. Linens can be cleaned. At least it wasn't your couch or carpet. Congrats on the new kittens!

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Today, a weird friend of my father's decided to visit us. Our house isn't very big, so when he went to the bathroom, I could hear everything. He didn't wash his hands after a massive dump, and when he came out of the bathroom he patted my face. FML

Today, I had pizza for lunch. Later, I passed out in front of a customer. Now I get to explain to my boss that I fainted on the job because of heartburn. FML

#21344355
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14009) - you deserved it (2759)

On 01/26/2015 at 1:55am - work - by Thisismylife (woman) - Canada

Today, I went to work with a great attitude, something that doesn't happen often. It was shortly ruined after some lady yelled at me because I accidentally shorted her one penny. Yep. One single penny. FML

#21344188
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15412) - you deserved it (2286)

On 01/25/2015 at 8:41pm - work - by WhyMe (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that, due to the walls at my uni dorm being ridiculously thin, my entire flat overheard me lose my virginity. Spanking and all. FML

#21344108
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17565) - you deserved it (5699)

On 01/25/2015 at 5:10pm - intimacy - by Orgasmataz (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

oathkeeper99's comment : Doesn't matter, had sex?

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Today, I had a job interview. The interviewer blatantly farted as I sat down, then she sneered, "Making yourself comfortable, I see..." FML

#21344008
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21229) - you deserved it (1561)

On 01/25/2015 at 1:21pm - work - by fartje - Netherlands



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  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

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