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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I found out that the guy I've been sleeping with is my mom's gynecologist. FML

#21346230
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1723) - you deserved it (187)

On 01/29/2015 at 2:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I woke up after taking the new sleeping pills I was prescribed for my insomnia. I slept for 12 hours and had 5 missed calls from my boss. FML

#21346205
11 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1621) - you deserved it (142)

On 01/29/2015 at 1:32pm - health - by anon - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my parents continue comparing me to my "perfect" friend. He smokes dope, is a compulsive thief, and has gone to juvie numerous times. I'm passing school with flying colors and have never been in any trouble with the law. Apparently I should be more like him. FML

#21346172
15 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1688) - you deserved it (115)

On 01/29/2015 at 12:01pm - misc - by John Doe (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I had to run for the train, but because of my bad foot and limping they held the train, much to people's displeasure. No one let me sit down, so for the 20 minute journey, I stood. With a bad foot. FML

#21346090
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8743) - you deserved it (1184)

On 01/29/2015 at 7:56am - work - by vampyrate3562 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I got attacked by a monkey. My country isn't even supposed to have monkeys in it. FML

#21346049
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9519) - you deserved it (783)

On 01/29/2015 at 5:10am - animals - by Crystal (woman) - Australia

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. Turns out his dad is the asshole customer that I complain about all the time. He recognized me too and spent the entire dinner making passive-aggressive remarks about how bad of an employee I am. FML

#21345967
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11632) - you deserved it (986)

On 01/29/2015 at 12:39am - work - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, a kid knocked on my door and said that he would clean the snow off of my car for $5. I agreed and checked up on him ten minutes later. Not only was he taking off the snow, he was taking off the paint with a scraper, trying to get rid of the ice. FML

#21345921
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10568) - you deserved it (1758)

On 01/28/2015 at 11:13pm - kids - by MrRen - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got out of the shower and walked into my living room to see my sis' and her boyfriend sitting very closely on our family's fairly large couch. I laughed and said, "Look at the happy couple." Then her now ex-boyfriend burst into tears. Turns out they'd just broken up. FML

#21345785
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12806) - you deserved it (1513)

On 01/28/2015 at 7:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I walked into a door on my way in to an interview, in front of the interviewer and a group of people waiting to be interviewed. FML

#21345740
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10844) - you deserved it (1400)

On 01/28/2015 at 6:18pm - work - by amyhyett - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, instead of taking down the Christmas tree, my sister covered it with Valentine's Day decorations. FML

Today, I fell asleep curling my bangs. I now look like Mrs. Potato head. FML

#21345701
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8405) - you deserved it (5875)

On 01/28/2015 at 5:20pm - misc - by WildShortstop13 - United States (South Dakota)

ash0158's comment : How....

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Today, my boyfriend and I went to the local park for some romantic time together. By the time we left, I'd been called a pedo and a cradle robber, and been given several dirty looks. I'm 31. My boyfriend is 30 and just very baby-faced. FML

#21345623
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17807) - you deserved it (1476)

On 01/28/2015 at 2:28pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Econforthwin's comment : Males generally don't look their age as much as women do I feel like. It could also mean your boyfriend is a hottie so congrats.

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Today, I was ringing up a woman at work. I saw she'd bought a birthday cake, so I smiled and said I hope whoever it was for has a happy birthday. She looked at me in disgust, told me to mind my own business, then called me a "chucklefuck bitch". Okay then. FML

#21345551
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17443) - you deserved it (1394)

On 01/28/2015 at 10:01am - work - by retailshell (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Econforthwin's comment : While thy customer is a huge jerk, chucklefuck is a pretty funny name to call someone. Sorry OP I'm sure you aren't one.

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