Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I crossed the street without holding her hand. FML

#21417560
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5860) - you deserved it (627)

On 05/29/2015 at 11:05am - love - by GlueAndCarrots - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my father told me that my mental health issues, which have been confirmed by multiple doctors and tests, are all caused by the fact that I'm slightly overweight and don't exercise a lot. FML

#21417547
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5382) - you deserved it (772)

On 05/29/2015 at 10:23am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, for our anniversary, I had made a small treasure hunt for my boyfriend, tying roses with notes of poetry to lampposts across campus to lead him to where we would have a romantic dinner. He couldn't find it because people had stolen the roses, or simply ripped them to pieces and thrown them away. FML

#21417526
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14273) - you deserved it (3688)

On 05/29/2015 at 9:04am - love - by Headless (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Theglc20's comment : People suck.

See all the comments →

Today, I was on the train going to work when my travel tea cup began spilling inside my purse, which was on my lap. It went all over my skirt, pooled at the bottom of my feet, and, yes, everyone notice that it happened to be piss-colored yellow. FML

#21417508
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12258) - you deserved it (1911)

On 05/29/2015 at 8:13am - misc - by Great (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned one of life's great lessons: it is possible to squeeze a Ketchup bottle so hard that the plastic breaks and everything lands on your face. FML

#21417490
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10889) - you deserved it (2817)

On 05/29/2015 at 6:58am - misc - by sassy_girl144 (woman) - United Kingdom (West Berkshire)

Enslaved's comment : So her bite was worse than her bark?

See all the comments →

Today, I started my day off with a relaxing cup of coffee, the morning paper, and the sound of my mother informing me I will be going to hell for being not believing in God. FML

#21417394
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15367) - you deserved it (2681)

On 05/29/2015 at 12:16am - misc - by idonthavereligion (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

ihavenolifehaha's comment : People like her give us normal Christians a bad name..

See all the comments →

Today, for my birthday, my boyfriend made me a coupon book. I thought it was sweet until I noticed they were all conditional. For example; "Give your boyfriend a blowjob and he'll give you a 10 minute back massage!". They're all like that and he's mad because I refuse to use them. FML

#21417382
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16077) - you deserved it (1651)

On 05/28/2015 at 11:39pm - intimacy - by shmoooopie (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that the reason why my boyfriend has been denying me sex isn't because he is scared of someone walking in on us. It's because his blow-up doll pleasures him more than I do. FML

#21417148
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20521) - you deserved it (3291)

On 05/28/2015 at 2:05pm - intimacy - by MarieAmber18 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I received a promotional message offering a half-off deal on an expensive coffee maker. The only reason why I received the message is because I bought that same coffee maker yesterday and I signed up to their mailing list. FML

#21417141
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18334) - you deserved it (1796)

On 05/28/2015 at 1:41pm - money - by FFS - Cyprus (Limassol)

Today, my daughter cried for ages after finding out that Nick Amaro was written out of Law and Order: SVU. She barely reacted when I told her that her mom and I are getting a divorce. FML

#21417105
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17706) - you deserved it (2141)

On 05/28/2015 at 11:40am - misc - by svunimportant - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I got engaged. When I called my father, who is out of state for a few days, to tell him, his response was, "What'd you do that for?" FML

#21417009
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19712) - you deserved it (1955)

On 05/28/2015 at 3:04am - love - by jessiebear159 (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I called 911 to report a drunk driver. The operator yelled at me for following the guy and told me to get off the phone because I shouldn't be driving with a phone to my ear. FML

#21416830
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20800) - you deserved it (5125)

On 05/27/2015 at 9:28pm - misc - by drivingmecrazy - United States (California)



Juliette Bubulle's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Juliette's illustrated FML
  • It's the weekend so let's plaster on a fake smile and plough through this shit one more time. Sorry, I was channelling Bill Hicks there. I'll start again. Hi everyone, how are you doing? This week…

Friday 29 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: