Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I tried to arrange my first gallery exhibition as a photography student. Not even my mother wants to come. FML

#21435796
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1297) - you deserved it (107)

On 07/03/2015 at 9:42am - misc - by wellthatsnicedear (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I rang up a good friend to ask her to be one of the two bridesmaids at my upcoming wedding. Before I could ask, she let me know that she would not be attending my wedding, as, "Weddings are expensive, so I'm not attending ones for people that are just acquaintances". FML

#21435764
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3903) - you deserved it (274)

On 07/03/2015 at 6:30am - misc - by NeedMoreFriends (woman) - United Kingdom (Wakefield)

Today, I'm babysitting for kids whose parents said they would be back by 12. Its 4am and they still aren't home. I don't get paid enough for this. FML

#21435758
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3841) - you deserved it (255)

On 07/03/2015 at 5:09am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

whycantisignup's comment : The problem is your boss forgot to offer sushi and challenge the client to a katana duel. He was obviously offended by this.

See all the comments →

Today, while swimming in my neighborhood pool, I noticed what looked like several cigarettes resting at the bottom and decided to investigate. Turns out it was actually just a used, bloody tampon that had spent enough time underwater to be broken into multiple pieces, and spread across the pool. FML

#21435503
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6223) - you deserved it (465)

On 07/02/2015 at 6:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a guest at the hotel I work at started shouting at me. Apparently the street vendor selling sunglasses outside the hotel sold her a pair of 'genuine' Ray Bans for $5. She wanted me to phone the police because she realized two days later they were fake. FML

#21435445
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7043) - you deserved it (468)

On 07/02/2015 at 4:25pm - love - by soo -

Today, I told my parents I'm pregnant. I got a long lecture from my mom about using protection. It would have been fine hearing all that, but I'm turning 22, I've been moved out for a few years, have a full time job with great benefits, and am getting married next summer. FML

#21435425
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8773) - you deserved it (1431)

On 07/02/2015 at 3:16pm - misc - by I'm an adult! - United States (Washington)

Today, I was sent to the principal's office because I refused to take my earbuds out. Those "earbuds" are my hearing aids. FML

#21435419
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18087) - you deserved it (849)

On 07/02/2015 at 2:59pm - misc - by Deaf - United States (California)

XxReddragonxX's comment : how can they not tell the difference?

See all the comments →

Today, my neighbor yelled at me for driving recklessly. I was going 35 mph, and she was stopped in the middle of a road around a blind curve. My "reckless driving" was slamming on the brakes so I wouldn't hit her. FML

#21435393
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13806) - you deserved it (953)

On 07/02/2015 at 2:00pm - misc - by _whyy_mee (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I heard my skinny 14-year-old daughter tell her friend, "Ugh, I wish I had leukemia or something so that I could lose weight." Yes, she actually said that. FML

catherine012's comment : As bad as it may sound, you should still talk to her about it. She may be going through some serious issues you are not aware of.

See all the comments →

Today, after helping run salads and bread to a table, they demanded I do something about the bug problem. I would've been more understanding if they hadn't chosen to sit outside. FML

#21435223
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17575) - you deserved it (1124)

On 07/02/2015 at 2:40am - work - by smokecloud_ - United States (Ohio)

Today, my long-distance boyfriend came to see me and told me that he had a surprise for me. I was excited at the idea of a romantic gesture, but forgot about it until he arrived and things began heating up. As I was removing his pants, I said, "Ooh, you shaved!" to which he replied, "Surprise!" FML

#21435204
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15986) - you deserved it (2260)

On 07/02/2015 at 1:53am - intimacy - by mirandale (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I quit my job so I wouldn't have to work with this one complete fuck-wit anymore. I told him what I thought of him, and then walked away giving him the middle finger. Turns out, he is a regular customer at my new job. Everyone loves him and thinks he's awesome. FML

#21435181
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17030) - you deserved it (6381)

On 07/02/2015 at 12:49am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: