Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Man or woman?

Today, my self-esteem issues got me jealous of Superman's hair. FML

#21385588
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (2954) - you deserved it (576)

On 04/01/2015 at 12:20pm - misc - by curseyousuperman (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my colleagues were excitedly talking about going for drinks after work. I heard one of them ask, Is Sam coming?' and shortly after leave without me. I'm Sam. FML

#21385304
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10281) - you deserved it (1938)

On 04/01/2015 at 7:37am - work - by Sam - Netherlands (Groningen)

Zelphoric's comment : THEY MUST NOT LIKE YOU ALSO I PREFER PINE DRINKS OVER FIR DRINKS

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Today, my girlfriend asked me to take my belt off as the buckle was hurting her leg. I didn't have a belt on. FML

#21385195
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9614) - you deserved it (2087)

On 04/01/2015 at 3:40am - intimacy - by zetuga (man) - United Kingdom (Luton)

EmmaRey's comment : How on earth did this make it through the moderation process?!

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Today, my brother mentioned my dad's birthday party. I said, "What party?" He said, "Shit, forgot I wasn't supposed to tell you." My own father doesn't want me at his party. FML

#21385144
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13706) - you deserved it (1802)

On 04/01/2015 at 2:06am - love - by Anon - United States (California)

Today, on my day off, I received a call from my boss asking why I wasn't at work yet. After getting dressed and an hour-long train ride later, I got there only to find out that it was an April Fool's prank. I had to take the train back home. FML

#21384991
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12906) - you deserved it (3861)

On 03/31/2015 at 10:15pm - work - by IDontGetPaidEnoughForThisShit (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Miss_Moody23's comment : C'mon moderators, you've got one job!

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Today, a really drunk couple staggered into the store I work at. One of them yelled at me, "Hey you! Kid! Tell us where the booze is at!" This would have been funny if these people weren't my parents. FML

#21384902
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12822) - you deserved it (1328)

On 03/31/2015 at 7:32pm - work - by DrunkParents - United States (Montana)

Today, I was siting in a library when a cute boy approached me, so I grabbed the nearest book. When he asked me what I was reading, I said I was revising for an English test. He laughed and pointed out that my book was in French. FML

#21384778
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7455) - you deserved it (8649)

On 03/31/2015 at 3:24pm - misc - by ip7 - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I was fired from job as a personal trainer. Why? Because I was working out with a friend while off-duty. Apparently, working out with a friend on a day off means I am training them under the table. FML

#21384707
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21415) - you deserved it (1700)

On 03/31/2015 at 12:47pm - work - by anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out there's a support page on Facebook for people who have been "hurt" by me. FML

#21384648
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11130) - you deserved it (19791)

On 03/31/2015 at 9:41am - misc - by SupportPage - United States (California)

Today, I am seven months pregnant with my third child. I woke up to my two-and-a-half year old trying to "pop the balloon" in my tummy. FML

#21384638
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18347) - you deserved it (2071)

On 03/31/2015 at 8:56am - kids - by mokki - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I dislocated my toe while putting on my socks. FML

#21384619
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21679) - you deserved it (3596)

On 03/31/2015 at 6:54am - health - by billy - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got in an argument with an ex-girlfriend who kept tactlessly bragging to me about her new boyfriend. I told her to read what she'd sent me, then pretend her boyfriend was telling her that. Fifteen minutes later, her boyfriend calls me, yelling for making her feel sad. FML

#21384606
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22076) - you deserved it (2491)

On 03/31/2015 at 5:35am - love - by lucasbeck99 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I took my class to swimming lessons at the local public pool. One student came out and proudly told me that she'd pooed in the shower, but it was OK because she'd then picked it up and flushed it down the toilet. FML

#21384585
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20454) - you deserved it (1656)

On 03/31/2015 at 3:40am - kids - by Teach (woman) - New Zealand (Canterbury)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • OK jkjk it was FMLS April Fools
  •   Yah its know over, ive stoppd wrotting… Sorry, I'll try again. There, it's over, I can stop typing TXT language with my forehead. Yes, you probably cottened on that it was our little…

Monday 30 March 2015

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