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Today, while spring cleaning, my cat came into the kitchen with a live mouse in her mouth. She looked me dead in the eyes and dropped the mouse, which then ran into my bedroom. It's been 4 hours and I still can't find it. Where's the cat? Chilling like nothing happened. FML

#21396858
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12469) - you deserved it (1152)

On 04/20/2015 at 2:06pm - animals - by craZycatLady - United States (Kansas)

Today, I received several pairs of panties in the mail that I'd ordered online. When I opened the box, I was shocked because every pair was basically huge granny-panties. I was sure none would fit properly, but I tried them on to be sure. They fit perfectly. FML

#21396824
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11610) - you deserved it (2723)

On 04/20/2015 at 1:01pm - love - by fatass - United States (Nebraska)

Today, after a relaxing week away, my husband and I came home to discover our 17 year old son crashed one of our cars against the other. FML

#21396823
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11631) - you deserved it (1288)

On 04/20/2015 at 12:57pm - money - by ihatekids - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had a theatre performance. I had to put on a lot of makeup for the role, and one of the guys said I looked nice. I smiled and said thanks. Seconds later, I'd been sucker-punched by his girlfriend for "flirting" with her man. FML

#21396780
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12332) - you deserved it (815)

On 04/20/2015 at 10:45am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

nesteremily's comment : Punch her back, explain later.

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Today, my mom called my workplace and told my boss to make sure I wear a hat so I didn't get heatstroke like I did on my last shift. I'm 25. FML

#21396530
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17819) - you deserved it (2265)

On 04/19/2015 at 10:39pm - work - by notmysistersbf (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

hanner12's comment : At least it's nice to know she's looking out for ya!

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Today, my exchange student asked me for a ride to a party at a friend's house that I didn't know about. When I said, "Oh, just let me change", she replied, "I just need the ride, you're not invited." FML

#21396492
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20456) - you deserved it (1806)

On 04/19/2015 at 9:46pm - misc - by me - Canada

c_wyld's comment : Tell her: "In this country, you drive, you party".

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Today, I pulled up to a red light. My ex was in the next car, and my car's windows are so tinted that you can't see through them, so I flipped him off. I was driving my mom's car. FML

#21396485
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8900) - you deserved it (17974)

On 04/19/2015 at 9:39pm - love - by queenbitch - United States (Michigan)

Today, while studying for an exam, the neighbor's chihuahua started barking outside. After a few seconds, my mom yelled out for me to stop laughing. She honestly thought the barking was my laughter. FML

#21396226
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22358) - you deserved it (2229)

On 04/19/2015 at 1:09pm - animals - by woof? (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my grandma told me point-blank that she despises gays, but that she'll go to my wedding for the booze and nothing more. FML

#21396211
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23295) - you deserved it (3292)

On 04/19/2015 at 12:34pm - love - by leonuniz (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was so sleep-deprived, I thought a white car driving toward me was a polar bear. I screamed like a little girl and started panicking. I live in California. FML

#21396178
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20221) - you deserved it (5321)

On 04/19/2015 at 11:06am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend let out a horrible fart in the middle of sex. Even though it was clearly his, he gave me disgusted look, called me a dirty bitch, then kept going. Let's just say I didn't finish. FML

#21396154
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22674) - you deserved it (2054)

On 04/19/2015 at 10:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I found out my best friend's girlfriend is cheating on him with his own brother. I went over to his place and told him everything while his girlfriend was in the same room. He called me a jealous liar who wanted to break them up, and kicked me out while she looked on, smirking. FML

#21396139
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22968) - you deserved it (2255)

On 04/19/2015 at 9:08am - misc - by Anunimos (man) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend with a serenade. After I finished, she told me she'd come over to tell me she'd found someone else and wanted to break up. FML

#21395896
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24132) - you deserved it (2324)

On 04/18/2015 at 9:03pm - love - by socialix - United States (New Mexico)



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