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Today, a old lady on the street told me that I should be wearing a bra because my nipples were visible under my white tee. I am a 37 year old man. FML

#6373189
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22134) - you deserved it (5202)

On 11/19/2009 at 7:41pm - health - by Mondo (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom and I took my senile grandmother to the mall, since she doesn't get out much. She complained it was hot, then took her clothing off in the middle of the food court. It took us thirty minutes to make her put her shirt back on. FML

#20187746
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22132) - you deserved it (1913)

On 12/02/2012 at 9:05am - misc - by Sam - United States (Indiana)

Today, my mom realized we have been sharing tooth brushes because they are similar colors. I told her it doesn't really matter since we're mother and daughter. She responded by saying that she loves me, but she has no idea where my mouth has been, and she doesn't want my diseases. Thanks mom. FML

#13383156
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22130) - you deserved it (9608)

On 10/09/2010 at 8:47pm - health - by nikki (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I attended my extended family's Christmas dinner. All throughout, my grandmother kept complaining about how the food tasted like crap, and making sexual remarks such as how "the stuffings were far better in my day, if you know what I mean." FML

#18608467
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22129) - you deserved it (2467)

On 12/25/2011 at 3:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I received my first payment of child support from my estranged husband: $50 and a note that said he wouldn't be paying any more. FML

#19335600
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22129) - you deserved it (3268)

On 03/23/2012 at 10:39pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, my friends decided it would be funny to engage the child locks on the rear doors of my SUV. My SUV has a bolted cage for the dog separating the front from the back. Guess who was locked in their own car for 2 hours? FML

#7194644
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22129) - you deserved it (3656)

On 01/07/2010 at 3:31am - animals - by Archie (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom was feeling down because of her gray hairs. In an attempt to cheer her up, I suggested that she dye them. Her hair turned orange. FML

#18569978
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22124) - you deserved it (4931)

On 12/21/2011 at 12:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had just finished riding my bike when I ran into the girl I am secretly in love with. While I walked over to her I got an erection through my spandex biking shorts. FML

#8730305
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22123) - you deserved it (9784)

On 02/28/2010 at 9:15pm - intimacy - by hornyloser770 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was holding a lit cigarette in one hand and a lollipop in the other. Guess which one I licked? FML

#1600117
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22122) - you deserved it (131232)

On 05/03/2009 at 5:05pm - misc - by htothecr (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I used the same credit card to apply to college and pay for a rave ticket. My card went through on the rave ticket but denied the college application fee. I guess my credit card is trying to tell me something about my future. FML

#6490055
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22121) - you deserved it (9208)

On 11/28/2009 at 2:23am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I received a compliment for the first time from a girl. She told me she admires my courage to go out in public since most ugly people don't like to. FML

#20083123
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22121) - you deserved it (1645)

On 09/22/2012 at 2:59am - misc - by IHateMyLife - United States (California)

Today, we were closing the restaurant early. I begin mopping as a couple walks in. The lady slips and falls, and to avoid a lawsuit, we offer them free food. After they left, I slipped on the freshly mopped kitchen floor with dishes in my hands. I didn't get free food. FML

#13056809
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22121) - you deserved it (8075)

On 09/15/2010 at 12:24am - work - by clumsyandhungry (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend kept pressuring me to get it on. I told him I was self-conscious abut my stomach and didn't want him to see it. His response? My double chin doesn't keep him from kissing me. FML

#5638225
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22119) - you deserved it (7120)

On 10/04/2009 at 7:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)



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