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Today, my mum decided to teach me a lesson about carelessly leaving my wallet about. She left it on the floor so our puppy could use it and its contents as a chew toy. I was almost impressed to discover that he can eat three £20 notes and still have room for debit cards. FML

#8971410
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22611) - you deserved it (8121)

On 03/10/2010 at 1:37pm - money - by MR (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I discovered I can properly operate the television remote with my feet. I then realized that it is pretty much my only talent. FML

#17280926
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22611) - you deserved it (7874)

On 07/27/2011 at 6:21pm - misc - by supergirl7 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I missed an important phone call. It's been so long since someone has called me that I didn't recognize my own ringtone. FML

#19195246
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22610) - you deserved it (3764)

On 03/01/2012 at 11:37am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand

Today, I was working the cash register. While helping a customer with her groceries, my bra snapped. I then had to ask my male boss if I could staple it back together. Thirty minutes later it snapped again. I then had to explain to my boss that I was too broke to buy a new one. FML

#20050418
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22610) - you deserved it (2178)

On 08/31/2012 at 1:23am - misc - by thatgirl17 - United States

Today, I got a text message saying "I'm sorry, I know it's our 4 month anniversary but it's not working out, I need to break up with you" followed by her complaining that I never call her as well. WTF? I haven't had a girlfriend for 6 months. FML

#2488
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22609) - you deserved it (2317)

On 01/24/2009 at 11:25pm - love - by EpicFail - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I learned the hard way that an ice cube is capable of ripping the skin off your bottom lip. FML

#16173128
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22609) - you deserved it (12635)

On 05/14/2011 at 3:06pm - health - by bloodyLIP - United States (New Jersey)

Today, thinking I was alone in my house, I went downstairs in my underwear, singing at the top of my voice. I strutted into the kitchen to find two middle-aged men I'd never seen before sat at the kitchen table, drinking coffee. Turns out they will be painting our house for the next two weeks. FML

#20077635
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22609) - you deserved it (3831)

On 09/18/2012 at 10:48am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, we had our friends over for dinner, one of whom is a psychiatrist. After a few drinks, my drunk wife and the equally drunk psychiatrist began to analyze my various character flaws. FML

#7969441
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22608) - you deserved it (2532)

On 02/07/2010 at 10:37am - misc - by bystander (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I got a date for Valentine's Day. The date is with my orthodontist; he's going to tighten my braces. FML

#18984766
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22609) - you deserved it (3227)

On 02/03/2012 at 3:47pm - misc - by tooembarassed - United States

Today, I witnessed a homeless man fall off of his bike and land face first onto the pavement. Bleeding and shivering in the 40 degree weather, I gave him the coat off of my back. He got up like nothing happened and sprinted away with it. Oh yeah, my wallet was in the inside pocket. FML

#6005073
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22606) - you deserved it (30312)

On 10/26/2009 at 10:43am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was making my bed which would normally be a simple task, until I leaned into the wooden foot of my bed, and put my entire body weight on my left nut. FML

#13364492
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22605) - you deserved it (9726)

On 10/08/2010 at 6:53am - health - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had a dream I was on the toilet taking the longest piss known to man. Unfortunately, it was partially true. FML

Today, I told my boyfriend that I didn't know what I was going to do over the Christmas holidays since he was going to be out of the country. He suggested that I work out and do some sit-ups. FML

#18550542
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22603) - you deserved it (7796)

On 12/19/2011 at 1:31am - love - by Doy (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)



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