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Today, I had to blow up an air mattress using only my lungs. After nearly passing out from lack of oxygen, I realized there was a hole in it. FML

#16454876
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20061) - you deserved it (25528)

On 06/01/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by ven980 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my husband changed the voice on my car's GPS to Mr T's. I don't know how to change it back. I've been saying, "I pity the fool" over and over again ever since. FML

#18510240
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20060) - you deserved it (4881)

On 12/14/2011 at 9:06am - misc - by annoyed (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw my crush walking on the other side of the street. She hadn't noticed me, so when she did I nonchalantly looked over and casually waved to look cool. I then walked right into a lamp post. FML

#2991516
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20059) - you deserved it (33985)

On 06/18/2009 at 10:04am - misc - by anonymous (man) - Norway (Akershus)

Today, I was at the library. I had to use the restroom, where I ended up singing in bad, made-up Japanese the whole time. When I went back across the library, my brother informed me that everyone could clearly hear me. FML

Today, after our old roommate left because he was too dirty for us to live with anymore, we found out that our new roommate has "borrowed" our shampoo, towel, toilet paper, liquor, without replacing them. I wish we still only had to clean up. FML

#17506977
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20058) - you deserved it (3763)

On 08/18/2011 at 2:59am - misc - by upset room mate - United States (Texas)

Today, my kids thought it would be funny to put pictures of naked men and women as people's ID on my phone. They won't tell me how to change it back. FML

#11305876
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20053) - you deserved it (27146)

On 06/19/2010 at 3:47am - kids - by Momma - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had to go down to the county police department to bail out my kids who thought it would be a good idea to try mugging an ice cream truck driver. FML

#20032351
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20053) - you deserved it (4094)

On 08/20/2012 at 6:02pm - kids - by Demetria (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML

#2485
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20052) - you deserved it (1814)

On 01/24/2009 at 9:47pm - love - by ohfantastic - United States (California)

Today, my wife and I convened our families for a joint dinner, followed by me breaking the news that my wife is pregnant. My father visibly scoffed, and my grandfather spent the rest of the evening muttering to him about how "breeders should be shot". Wonderful. FML

#19704356
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20051) - you deserved it (2011)

On 05/30/2012 at 12:45pm - kids - by unzucht (man) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I was renovating the house, and my girlfriend asked, "Do you use electrical tape on electrical stuff?" Not knowing where she was going with this, I just gave her a puzzled look. She continued by saying, "Because it's not like people use duct tape on ducks." FML

#20158312
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20051) - you deserved it (2787)

On 11/11/2012 at 12:05am - love - by Danny - United States (Utah)

Today, I met my son for the first time since I had to put him up for adoption over two decades ago. I wanted to make amends and get to know him. Instead, all I got to know was how well he can throw a punch. FML

#18799303
346 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20048) - you deserved it (51119)

On 01/13/2012 at 8:38pm - kids - by me (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while on trial for a desperately needed new job, I tripped crossing a road with my would-be manager. I twisted my ankle, and he had to carry me across the road and call a taxi for me to go home. FML

#19243809
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20047) - you deserved it (2371)

On 03/09/2012 at 1:48am - work - by Katie (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I had to get to class at 9:00 to take a test. I woke up at 6:00, and figured I could wait a few minutes before getting ready. The next thing I knew, it was 10:30. FML

#20200420
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20044) - you deserved it (20922)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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