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Today, I was on a plane and realized that the woman next to me was hiding a hedgehog in a plastic container. I'm severely afraid of hedgehogs but not wanting to give the woman up and get her in trouble, I tried to stay quiet. Which led to me to quietly hyperventilate and pass out on the plane. FML

#20445879
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22461) - you deserved it (6704)

On 01/07/2013 at 5:21am - health - by scaredofhedges (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while driving home, I realized I forgot my house key. Luckily, when I arrived home, someone had already broken into my house. Guess I didn't need the key. FML

#19486401
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22461) - you deserved it (1723)

On 04/17/2012 at 8:55pm - misc - by yuuupyup - United States (New Jersey)

Today, we were drawing self-portraits in school. I'm horrible at art, so I turned to the person next to me and stated that mine looked really ugly. He replied saying, "No, it looks exactly like you." FML

#8557301
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22459) - you deserved it (6014)

On 02/22/2010 at 4:24pm - misc - by quasimodo - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was shopping in a store and an employee was mopping the floor. She mopped all around where I was standing then told me to wait until the floor dried to move. I had to go to the bathroom. FML

#12949008
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22459) - you deserved it (5847)

On 09/07/2010 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my girlfriend made me shave my chest. Afterwards, she said I looked like I was 12. She won't have sex with me until it grows back. FML

#6287629
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22455) - you deserved it (4482)

On 11/13/2009 at 2:04pm - intimacy - by thelistman (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, during a lunch I said "It must be awful to realize that you've been cheated on!". One of the men present had just found out that he had been. I then try to correct my tactlessness by saying "The worst must be when your wife leaves you for another woman". Which was also the case. FML

#399
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22455) - you deserved it (8518)

On 11/27/2008 at 7:34am - misc - by lovely-sweet - Sent from mobile version

Today, as I was about to leave for work, my 16-year-old son stumbled home in nothing but his underwear and pink cowboy boots. He threw his hands in the air, yelled, "BOTTLE SIP BOTTLE GUZZLE," promptly threw up and passed out in it. FML

#20111636
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22454) - you deserved it (3995)

On 10/11/2012 at 2:59am - kids - by Failed Parent - United States

Today, after five months of not working, I have a check waiting for me at the office. Too bad the office is in another city. My gas tank is empty, and I have no money to put gas in my car. FML

#8643588
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22453) - you deserved it (3208)

On 02/25/2010 at 5:29pm - money - by arirx12 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my mom was on my Facebook and saw a chick leave a nasty comment on my status. My mom commented back something awful and really bitchy. My mom still fights my fights for me. I'm 20. FML

#13632865
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22454) - you deserved it (7239)

On 10/28/2010 at 11:17pm - misc - by mommysgirlapparently (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realized why my sister refuses to let me clean her side of the room. She's secretly been trying to revive dead ants. FML

#20023605
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22453) - you deserved it (1560)

On 08/16/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by scarredforlife - United States (Maryland)

Today, I slid on ice and hit another car while driving to work. My car was totalled, and my leg hurt, while the other car had very little damage. Not two minutes later, the salt truck drove by, spraying the road. FML

#7275776
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22452) - you deserved it (3001)

On 01/11/2010 at 8:43am - misc - by wrecked (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I learned that my hairdo must resemble a rat. I found out when a hawk swooped down and dug its claws into my head while I was sunbathing. FML

#18408881
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22452) - you deserved it (5661)

On 12/02/2011 at 12:14am - animals - by inpain - United States (California)

Today, I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours so far, and I've already pulled five carving forks out of four different people. Good job, everybody. FML

#20174027
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22452) - you deserved it (1525)

On 11/22/2012 at 4:03pm - work - by DocFUCKINGHATESSTUPIDPEOPLE (man) - United States (Texas)



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