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Today, for the first time in years, I broke down in tears, over a Hallmark commercial. FML

#18157234
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21578) - you deserved it (6095)

On 11/04/2011 at 3:38pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I started my new job. Less than one hour into the day, my boss told me that the reason he hired me was that I was the least attractive of everyone he interviewed, so I'd be less likely to cause a distraction. FML

#20083494
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21576) - you deserved it (1698)

On 09/22/2012 at 12:17pm - work - by Annette (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, after weeks of wondering if my cat has a fetish for licking my bed covers, I finally witnessed him licking up an ant off of the covers. Turns out that my bed is infested with ants. FML

#20138030
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21576) - you deserved it (4607)

On 10/29/2012 at 12:23am - animals - by lifelike (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my friends thought it'd be funny to hold lighters under the smoke alarms while I was sleeping. FML

#14632650
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21574) - you deserved it (2814)

On 01/18/2011 at 10:40pm - misc - by desertpunk75 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I noticed I'd mislaid one half of the "Monday" pair of socks from my "days of the week" set that were a gift for my birthday. I'm slightly OCD. I think I'm going to rip the floorboards up if I don't find it. FML

#18449998
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21574) - you deserved it (9188)

On 12/07/2011 at 12:32am - misc - by socks (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML

#18946444
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21579) - you deserved it (9652)

On 01/29/2012 at 8:27pm - health - by Rachal - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was diagnosed with pneumonia. My breathing is short and heavy, and I wanted my boyfriend to comfort me. Instead, he called me Darth Vader, patted me on the head, and said, "Don't worry, the Force will be with you." FML

#20192329
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21574) - you deserved it (3715)

On 12/05/2012 at 12:55pm - health - by Emily - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I'm in the hospital and it's been 44 hours since I've eaten anything. My doctors won't let me eat and my parents are sitting across the room, eating. FML

#20171321
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21574) - you deserved it (1414)

On 11/20/2012 at 6:25pm - health - by RayneSong - United States (Michigan)

Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML

#19214836
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21572) - you deserved it (27243)

On 03/04/2012 at 3:46pm - misc - by Hannah (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went on a coffee date with the man I've been in love with for a while. Before I knew what was going on, he'd started chatting up a pretty girl sitting nearby. I had to drink my coffee alone while he got her number. FML

#20113670
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21572) - you deserved it (2117)

On 10/12/2012 at 2:43pm - love - by firstdategonebad - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I lost my virginity. It took all of 30 seconds. FML

#8031607
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21571) - you deserved it (4570)

On 02/08/2010 at 10:33pm - intimacy - by unsatisfied - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got married. I received a beautifully wrapped gift from my dad. I was full of excitement until I opened it and found two taxidermied rabbits. The ones I had when I was in the fifth grade. FML

#20120354
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21569) - you deserved it (1600)

On 10/16/2012 at 10:48pm - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom and I took my senile grandmother to the mall, since she doesn't get out much. She complained it was hot, then took her clothing off in the middle of the food court. It took us thirty minutes to make her put her shirt back on. FML

#20187746
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21567) - you deserved it (1876)

On 12/02/2012 at 9:05am - misc - by Sam - United States (Indiana)



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