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Today, I though it would be funny to go on my boyfriend's facebook to change his status. While in the process, his account received a message. Turns out he's planning on hooking up with his ex girlfriend/one of my friends and is definitely over me. How's that for snooping around? FML

#6132995
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22832) - you deserved it (33697)

On 11/03/2009 at 9:04am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my friend and I offered a hot girl a lift home from campus. I was sitting in the passenger seat and she climbed in behind me. As I adjusted my seat forward to give her more leg room, my friend pulled off - slamming my seat back into her legs. FML

#13300541
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22831) - you deserved it (3757)

On 10/03/2010 at 5:23am - misc - by tukkies (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I was trying to be-friend a boy who was sitting alone. He had his gameboy nearly plastered to his eyes. I, cleverly, say to him, "Geeze don't put that thing so close, your eyes will fall out!" He took off his sunglasses, eyes going crooked, and said, "I'm legally blind." Insert foot here. FML

#2478
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22829) - you deserved it (7902)

On 01/24/2009 at 7:27pm - kids - by thatsjustgreat - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend shared with me his anxiety about death, so I shared with him one of my ridiculously irrational fears. He thought I was making fun of him and now won't talk to me. FML

#18831926
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22830) - you deserved it (4950)

On 01/17/2012 at 1:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I met my daughter's boyfriend, who she hopes to marry. I asked what he does, to which he answered, "I'm a Flamencologist." Flamencology? The study of Flamenco? Huh? FML

#14838369
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22828) - you deserved it (6373)

On 02/04/2011 at 10:01am - kids - by dancer101 (woman) - United States

Today, I took my boyfriend to my family's traditional late Thanksgiving dinner. While eating, my mom brought up celebrity infidelity. My grandpa ended up looking me in the eye and saying, "Look Angie, sometimes what a man has just isn't enough. When that happens, cheating is forgiveable." FML

#18369029
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22828) - you deserved it (2363)

On 11/27/2011 at 6:45pm - love - by angie429 (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was teaching a special techniques class for ballet and was focusing on pirouettes. I was teaching a group of 8 year olds, and one student could do perfect triple turns one after the other. I still can't do them, and I've been dancing for 15 years. FML

#8437368
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22827) - you deserved it (5408)

On 02/19/2010 at 6:52am - kids - by JJ101 (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, at my job as a lifeguard, I told a teenager to, "Walk please." He then threw his soda at me as he ran away. We aren't allowed off stand unless it's an emergency, so I baked in that soda for 30 minutes. FML

#19692881
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22828) - you deserved it (3015)

On 05/28/2012 at 10:05am - work - by emonsteadman - United States (Texas)

Today, I found my brother tampering with my laptop. He had changed the entire settings, in ways I don't even know how to fix. I finally had to get my mom to threaten him to change it back to its original setting. I'm 15. He's six and can barely get dressed by himself. FML

#13455982
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22826) - you deserved it (8742)

On 10/15/2010 at 4:33am - misc - by fmlforreal - Singapore

Today, out of partying reflex, I downed Communion wine like a vodka shot. FML

#20830409
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22826) - you deserved it (44196)

On 08/10/2013 at 6:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, after dieting, rigorous exercising and a major lifestyle change, I have finally reached my fitness goal. My parents were more excited about my 17-year-old brother getting to 3rd base with his girlfriend. FML

#19670300
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22825) - you deserved it (2620)

On 05/23/2012 at 10:47pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my cheating, psycho asscricket of an ex texted me and asked me back out. I said no, and didn't think any more of it, at least until an hour later, when I looked out my window, only to see him smearing a bag of dog crap all over my porch. FML

#20020463
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22825) - you deserved it (1857)

On 08/14/2012 at 11:02am - love - by WELLFUCKYOUTOO (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realized that I can still do the splits. Why? Because I fell down an entire flight of stairs, everyone in the hall saw me land and applauded. Someone even shouted "and she sticks the landing." FML

#8965492
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22824) - you deserved it (3225)

On 03/10/2010 at 3:09am - misc - by misty_love (woman) - United States (Hawaii)



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