Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I received an overdue bill for my now nonexistent car that caught fire in July. FML

#13713270
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22928) - you deserved it (3030)

On 11/04/2010 at 10:42am - money - by Lisa - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I took a taxi to my hotel. I specifically said that my destination was the Hilton resort. He took me to a bed and breakfast across town. When I finally got to my hotel, I cursed him out and didn't give him a tip. I then realized I'd left my phone in the taxi after he left. FML

#17515191
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22923) - you deserved it (22270)

On 08/19/2011 at 12:11am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my roomate thought it would be funny to take pictures of my morning wood and put it up on Facebook for everyone to see. FML

#5680173
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22923) - you deserved it (2872)

On 10/06/2009 at 9:53am - intimacy - by Crappit (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at my sister's wedding. Everything was going flawlessly. That is, until our visibly drunk mom started a punch-up over who got to cut the cake first. FML

#17931151
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22921) - you deserved it (1946)

On 10/07/2011 at 10:13pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I confided to my dad that my girlfriend had dumped me for another guy. He said "good" and explained that given how overpopulated the planet is, he's actually disappointed that I'm not gay. His advice was: "just wank it off and move on". FML

#19377820
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22922) - you deserved it (2635)

On 03/30/2012 at 6:21pm - love - by sad (man) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, I awoke at 5am to the smell of smoke and the sound of sirens. It seems the whole Santa Monica Fire Department had made it outside our apartment complex. We had to wake up every single person on our floor. What for? An old lady burned a muffin. FML

#6911518
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22917) - you deserved it (1995)

On 12/23/2009 at 10:21pm - misc - by Muffinhater (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend was talking to me on the land line when his cell phone rang. He told me to wait "two seconds" while he talked to a classmate. Their "two second" conversation lasted ten minutes, and now I can hear the French Open on the TV in background. He forgot he was talking to me. FML

#10913904
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22917) - you deserved it (3909)

On 06/01/2010 at 10:34pm - misc - by chiclet - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got pulled over for speaking on my phone. I accepted the fine because I was too ashamed to tell the cute officer that I was actually trying to pop a huge pimple on my cheek. FML

#21363177
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22921) - you deserved it (10887)

On 02/25/2015 at 5:33am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I got a parking ticket while I was in the car. I didn't even notice it happen. Ninja cops do exist. FML

#19589899
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22916) - you deserved it (6279)

On 05/07/2012 at 10:52pm - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were arguing about how he was too busy for me. During that conversation, he was texting his best friend and then called by his brother to drive him home. Instead of returning to finish our conversation, he left to prepare for his fishing trip with his mates tomorrow. FML

#14081508
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22913) - you deserved it (5420)

On 12/04/2010 at 7:03am - love - by anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my eleven year old daughter called me a moron, after I told her she was dead wrong when she claimed that rabbits lay eggs. FML

#19376586
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22915) - you deserved it (4595)

On 03/30/2012 at 2:44pm - kids - by James (man) - United States

Today, my friends decided it would be funny to yell out "Pass us the bong, Emma!" while I was on the phone to my mother. FML

#8658018
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22910) - you deserved it (5622)

On 02/26/2010 at 3:30am - misc - by UnfortunateGirly (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I managed to get locked inside a caravan toilet. My relatives heard me having a panic attack and instead of unlocking the door, they called the neighbours over to enjoy my anguish and embarrassment. FML

#17627414
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22908) - you deserved it (2686)

On 08/31/2011 at 2:34am - misc - by RhuLynette - United Kingdom



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: