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Today, I asked my boss for a promotion. "You don't work here but I can give you a job application." I've been working here for 8 years. FML

#21448654
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25719) - you deserved it (1758)

On 07/28/2015 at 4:44pm - work - by Application - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was in a busy airport bathroom with my three year old son. While in the process of pulling my pants down, my son decided to open the stall door. I jumped up to yank the door closed but not before the line of waiting women saw me with my pants wrapped around my ankles. FML

#7039639
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25718) - you deserved it (4023)

On 12/30/2009 at 5:42pm - kids - by doody (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I decided I would try this feature on my banking app which lets me deposit checks by sending a picture of it. The instructions say to rip the check after depositing. The deposit didn't work and now I've got a ripped up paycheck. FML

#20650425
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25716) - you deserved it (51603)

On 05/08/2013 at 6:21pm - money - by Checkless chick - United States

Today, I went to the drugstore to get supplies for my broken toe. Because of the swelling, I could only wear open-toed sandals on this cold day. At the store, a tall, heavy man in winter boots tried to get by me, and ended up stepping on the toes of my good foot. FML

#7094930
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25715) - you deserved it (2420)

On 01/02/2010 at 12:26am - health - by ouchie (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my thirteen month old son woke me up at 6AM on my day off, by punching me in the eye. FML

#14165047
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25715) - you deserved it (5739)

On 12/11/2010 at 11:16am - kids - by blueberry_hill (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I learned that the cute pet name my boyfriend has been calling me for the past month is actually an acronym for "pain in the a**". FML

#14085005
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25713) - you deserved it (6154)

On 12/04/2010 at 3:35pm - love - by Pita (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out I have dandruff when a chick passed by and said out loud to her friends: "That dude's hair is having an early Xmas!" FML

#10733187
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25712) - you deserved it (6379)

On 05/24/2010 at 12:14pm - health - by Dandruff - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boss said to me: 'You know, our competitors are also hiring!' FML

#295
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25711) - you deserved it (2547)

On 11/13/2008 at 3:42am - work - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I left my wallet on top of my car when I filled up with gas. I drove away and didn't realize it until I got home. I went back and found it on the side of the road. Empty of my credit cards, pictures and checks. All that was left was my driver's license. FML

#2672288
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25712) - you deserved it (41237)

On 06/06/2009 at 9:11pm - money - by fml_seriouslyfml (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, it finally clicked in my mind how desperately lonely I am, when I shaved one of my legs just to find out what a woman's leg feels like. FML

#20022524
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25710) - you deserved it (8397)

On 08/15/2012 at 12:46pm - love - by lonely. (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend's idiotic friend shoved me into a stream so I could be "reunited" with my family, since my name is River. The first thing I saw as I climbed out, soaking wet, was my boyfriend high-fiving his friend. FML

#21443301
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25712) - you deserved it (2425)

On 07/18/2015 at 12:08am - misc - by River (woman) -

Today, I sat in on a university-level physics lecture, listening to my hyped-up co-students approximating the hypothetical situation of the Sun consisting of gerbils. The conversation then continued towards how much better energy/mass ratio the gerbil-sun would have compared to the actual star. FML

#21258867
88 comments

Today, my mom duly informed me I'm the reason people have middle fingers. FML

#14413679
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25707) - you deserved it (5757)

On 12/31/2010 at 8:16pm - misc - by edulover (woman) - United States (California)



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