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Today, I opened the freezer for some Poptarts and a giant block of meat fell and broke my toe. FML

#8248979
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27207) - you deserved it (6564)

On 02/14/2010 at 1:05pm - misc - by freakingow (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while waiting in line at a store, a toddler behind me was throwing a major meltdown while his father yelled at him, giving me a migraine. I turned to the woman behind me and said, "Can you believe this kid? I feel sorry for his mother." Turns out the woman was his mother. FML

#21064367
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27206) - you deserved it (44909)

On 02/18/2014 at 11:31am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found a tiny, featherless baby bird. I knew it was impossible, but I tried to keep it alive through the day. Before I could get it to the wildlife center, it died, and when I got all choked up over it, my mom started laughing at me and saying how "weak" I was. FML

#20077707
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27203) - you deserved it (4505)

On 09/18/2012 at 12:19pm - animals - by Birdwatcher (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend, when things got a little frisky and we started making out. It was my first time French-kissing, and apparently he has a very sensitive gag reflex, because the moment my tongue went in, he started retching, and vomited moments later. FML

#20134512
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27202) - you deserved it (3603)

On 10/26/2012 at 5:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)

Today, I was on a plane when I suddenly felt the need to use the toilet. I didn't make it in time and I had to spend the remainder of my trip in soiled clothes. FML

#12903191
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27201) - you deserved it (15804)

On 09/04/2010 at 3:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I walked into my elderly grandmother's trailer, used the bathroom and went to wash my hands. She had a soft spot in the floor that she covered with a bathmat. I fell through. Right leg up to my hip in the floor, boobs stuck on the counter. My husband and grandmother stood there laughing. FML

#18624537
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27201) - you deserved it (2980)

On 12/27/2011 at 12:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my father lectured me for dating a man with "no future". even though he's entering a PhD program next year at a top university. Meanwhile, my dad's last relationship was with a 20-year-old hooker who ended up stealing his credit cards. FML

#21438331
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27201) - you deserved it (1682)

On 07/08/2015 at 2:17am - misc - by WayToGoDaddyHo (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, feeling romantic and overwhelmed with love, I told my fiancée: "I don't know what I'd do without you." She replied: "Well, you'd wank". FML

#591
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27199) - you deserved it (5983)

On 12/25/2008 at 1:07am - intimacy - by Nicos - Sent from mobile version

Today, at a party, I watched the guy I've liked for AGES come out of a bedroom with one of my gay male friends. They were in there for a while. FML

#1485
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27199) - you deserved it (2878)

On 01/17/2009 at 6:17pm - love - by C2 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out that I have to reschedule my upcoming honeymoon because my office will be understaffed that week, due to the boss going on vacation right after my wedding. Oh, yeah, and he's in my bridal party. FML

#14738244
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27199) - you deserved it (2534)

On 01/27/2011 at 11:24pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I had to announce to the whole house that I was going the bathroom, because the lock on the door is broken. Before I had the chance to wipe, my dad loudly burst through the door, stark bollock naked, to take a shower. FML

#17388987
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27199) - you deserved it (2485)

On 08/06/2011 at 5:06pm - misc - by Pinkie (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to my local coffee shop. I soon witnessed the girl making my drink apparently dislodge a wedgie from her ass-crack and then sneeze into her hands. When I confronted her, she loudly accused me of "visually molesting" her. FML

#19974801
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27199) - you deserved it (2201)

On 07/22/2012 at 12:48pm - misc - by bitchimgay (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I gave my virginity to my boyfriend. All I got in return was rug burn and an infection. FML

#21479527
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27199) - you deserved it (5817)

On 10/13/2015 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by luckygirl - Croatia (Grad Zagreb)



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