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Today, my boyfriend of a month had to leave early. I asked him why and he replied that his brother was getting off the bus and he needed to feed him. I had never met his brother, and I said "He can't feed himself? What is he, retarded?" He is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6920) - you deserved it (63419)
On 07/09/2009 at 8:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Today, at work, my manager fell in front of an entire lobby full of people on a wet floor. I'm the only one who burst out laughing. Turns out she has a broken arm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6921) - you deserved it (22664)
On 11/12/2010 at 11:10pm - work - by klm878 - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I was posing in front of the mirror, when I realized that everyone who looks at me can easily tell which arm I use to masturbate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6920) - you deserved it (21287)
On 02/24/2012 at 2:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, it was my first day at a new school. I pulled into the parking lot and saw this really cute guy. I was checking him out in my rear view mirror. When I looked ahead, there was something in the road, so I swirved real hard and took down an entire wooden fence. That something was a plastic bag. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6919) - you deserved it (35496)
On 08/13/2009 at 8:18am - misc - by Distracted (woman) - United States (Alabama)
Today, it snowed. So, a guy I like and I decided to go sledding. I really wanted to impress him by going down the hill and casually slowing down at the bottom right at his feet. Instead, I crashed into him and broke his ankle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6919) - you deserved it (25488)
On 12/06/2009 at 10:32pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was shopping for pillows at Bed Bath and Beyond. My husband playfully picked up a pillow pretending to start a pillow fight. I grabbed the largest pillow and chased him with it. When I finally caught up with him, a manager came around the corner. I was escorted out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6919) - you deserved it (21168)
On 10/18/2010 at 7:52am - love - by sofakingweetodit - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, it's my mother's birthday. She received the ultimate gift from my brother, who told her he had just been accepted into medical school. I bought her scratch-offs. She won a dollar. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6919) - you deserved it (16702)
On 06/14/2012 at 1:42pm - misc - by bad son - United States (California)
Today, my coworker told me that the framed picture our boss put on her desk last week was not, as I originally thought, a picture of her father, but a picture of Rupert Murdoch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6917) - you deserved it (1630)
On 01/12/2009 at 11:03am - work - by newscorp employee - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I woke up with a vague memory of buying something last night while drunk. According to my credit card summary I made a $270 purchase from a home shopping channel. I guess in 5-7 days I'll find out what it was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6917) - you deserved it (17263)
On 11/04/2012 at 11:37am - money - by fnfantastic - United States (Indiana)
Today, I just realised that the coworker I refused to leave my wife for is now happily married with someone else, while I'm now divorced. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6915) - you deserved it (17022)
On 12/29/2008 at 11:34pm - love - by - Sent from mobile version
Today, I decided to fake it when my husband and I were making love. Afterwards, he told me that he could tell my head was "really in the game" and felt a stronger connection with me now and was glad I opened up and "let go" with him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6915) - you deserved it (29263)
On 03/17/2010 at 11:46am - intimacy - by shouldabeenapornstar (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, at work, a customer came in. Since I was behind the counter, I asked if she needed help with anything. I've worked there for five years, and I didn't recognize my own boss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6914) - you deserved it (26326)
On 08/15/2011 at 1:00am - work - by DramaticSigh (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Monday 20 May 2013
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