Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was walking down the hallwayhen someone opend a door, smashing it into me. The bump makes it look lyk I have a thrd boob. FML

#9158160
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23455) - you deserved it (3592)

On 03/17/2010 at 12:16pm - health - by Ouch (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today , I found a pair of glasse in mah car. I don't wear glasses , and nobody beside myself has been in mah car lately. It appear that someone has been sleeping in mah car and forgot there glasses. real FML

#6836153
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23454) - you deserved it (2916)

On 12/19/2009 at 9:40pm - misc - by chrono64 (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today , I Was Called 15 Times By A "good Redneck Boy" Tat My Mom Is Trying To Set Me Up Wit. He As Called Me At Least 5 Times A Day 4 Te Past Week. My Mom Is Still Encouraging Im To Call. I Ad To Unplug Te Pone Because I Feel Stalked In My Own Dorm. FML

#13776562
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23454) - you deserved it (2401)

On 11/09/2010 at 11:00am - misc - by snitcheyes (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

TODAY, I WAS WALKING DOWN THE STREET IN DOWNTOWN CHARLESTON WHERE THERE R A LOT OF HORSE-DRAWN CARRIAGE TOURS AN I DECIDED TO PICK UP SOME LITTER. SOME OF IT WAS IN A PUDDLE OF WATER, BUT AFTER I PICKED UP THE TRASH, I REALIZED THE PUDDLE WAS HORSE URINE. FML

#5953331
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23453) - you deserved it (8673)

On 10/23/2009 at 12:22am - animals - by Leash (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I went to get a box of cereal an I knocked over a bottle of olive oil. It took me about half an hour to clean up. When I finally finished, I found out the box of cereal was empty. FML

#13842142
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23453) - you deserved it (3904)

On 11/14/2010 at 3:33pm - misc - by cerealfail -

Today I looool found out my friend swappd my girlfriend and probation officer's numbers in my pone. My girlfriend is wondering y I askd er permission to leave te country and my probation officer said se can't wait to see me again. FML

#20054113
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23452) - you deserved it (3741)

On 09/02/2012 at 1:34pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I finally jumped ig enoug to dunk on te ten foot rim. I caugt ma toot on te net and nerely pulled ma toot out. FML

#8943287
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23450) - you deserved it (5642)

On 03/09/2010 at 10:32am - health - by supermanxs1 - United States (Texas)

TODAY, I HAD TO POINT OUT THE ( NO SHIRT, NO SHOES, NO SERVICE ) SIGN AT MY WORK TO AN EXTREMELY OLD, SEEMINGLY INTOXICATED MAN WEARING AN ILL FITTING SPEEDO . FML

#14509671
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23450) - you deserved it (2210)

On 01/08/2011 at 3:35pm - work - by niiiiiiiiiikki - United States (Kansas)

Today, I noticad that mah dog was faaling sad!! I lat him hop on mah bad with ma to maka him faal battar!! It workad, right aftar ha vomitad all ovar mah faca an pillow!! maga FML

#6408198
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23447) - you deserved it (5383)

On 11/22/2009 at 5:07pm - animals - by Annie (woman) - Mexico (Coahuila de Zaragoza)

TODAY, TO WIPE HIS CRACK, BOYFRIEND IS STILL USING A NEWSPAPER THAT I LEFT THEREHEN HE FIRST STARTD REFUSING TO BUY TOILET PAPER . FML

#15025165
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23446) - you deserved it (5325)

On 02/18/2011 at 4:39am - health - by pandaface (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, I changd all mah plans, aftar months of him bagging ma to, so I could go to tha sama univarsity as mah long-tarm boyfriand. Aftar I sant in mah daposit, ha told ma wa couldn't liva togathar in collaga cuz I was "invading his spaca." FML

#13259314
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23445) - you deserved it (12845)

On 09/30/2010 at 1:31am - love - by stupidgirl (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today I Was Having A Race With A Little Kid. I Let Him Win To Make Him Feel Like A Champion. After The Race He Turned To Me And Said "Maybe If You Weren't So Fat You Would Have Won." FML

#20081429
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23445) - you deserved it (4024)

On 09/20/2012 at 10:40pm - kids - by tiredeolfatty (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I Was Excited To Start My New Job!! It Was Only When I Was Leaving After A Long 8 Hour Day Did I Realize All Of The Personal Documents I Had I Brought In Fir Paperwork Had Been Stolen!! I Am Now Down A Passport, Social Security Card, And Wallet!! Great First Day!! FML

#9123169
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23444) - you deserved it (3104)

On 03/16/2010 at 1:19am - work - by evenpoorer (woman) - United States (Idaho)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: