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Today, I locked my keys in my car and called AAA. He got out to take a look at my car, and he locked himself out of his own car with his tools inside. It took us 40 minutes with a screwdriver and stick to unlock his car and 40 seconds to unlock mine after. 9 hours later, I found my extra key. FML

#7302143
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23684) - you deserved it (5405)

On 01/12/2010 at 4:51pm - misc - by Dani (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I held hands with a male mannequin in a department store, just to remember what holding hands felt like. FML

#20069351
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23684) - you deserved it (5874)

On 09/12/2012 at 8:26pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I almost missed the bus. I grabbed my backpack and ran out the door. It wasn't until after we got to school that I realized I was still in my slippers. FML

#16493871
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23683) - you deserved it (8519)

On 06/04/2011 at 2:00am - misc - by Connie - United States (New York)

Today, I sent my boss a link to a website I thought would answer a simple question she'd asked. Turns out, yes, the site did answer her question, but it also had some very suggestive ads on it. Apparently I'm the only person in the office who uses adblock. FML

#7437531
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23678) - you deserved it (2495)

On 01/19/2010 at 2:26pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my mom came home drunk and yelled at me for 20 minutes for not feeding the cat. We don't have a cat. FML

#20164653
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23675) - you deserved it (1556)

On 11/15/2012 at 7:36pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to a big family dinner. I didn't realize I hadn't been invited until we were about to sit down to eat. There were 12 chairs, 12 plates, 12 forks, and 12 glasses. I was the 13th person to arrive. FML

#20141489
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23672) - you deserved it (2298)

On 10/31/2012 at 10:37am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I finally told my girlfriend I love her. She corrected my grammar. FML

#6978473
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23671) - you deserved it (9053)

On 12/27/2009 at 7:37pm - love - by ITalkGood - Sent from mobile version

Today, trying to be cute, I told my soon-to-be husband he was the ying to my yang. He responded with "Baby, you're the Monica Lewinsky to my Bill Clinton." FML

#13762058
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23672) - you deserved it (7884)

On 11/08/2010 at 4:50am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I found out that all the things I've lent to my best friend over the last few years that have never been returned were actually pawned off so she could pay her cable bill. FML

#19395452
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23668) - you deserved it (2932)

On 04/02/2012 at 2:44pm - money - by Kelly (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I asked a guy out on a coffee date, and we started talking about our mutual careers. At the end of the date he asked me if I had any more questions about job opportunities or any more advice, then shook my hand and gave me his contact card. FML

#5748
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23668) - you deserved it (3191)

On 02/02/2009 at 7:54pm - love - by myrie (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally convinced my son to use the potty. Later, he saw a show on TV about a toilet monster. Now he's too scared to even step foot into the bathroom. Here's to another few months of diaper changes. FML

#10906568
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23664) - you deserved it (4012)

On 06/01/2010 at 12:43pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I had a panic attack. Not on a crowded train, or an airplane, or in school, or any of the expected places. It was in my yoga class, which my therapist recommended for me, while I was in a dead-body position. FML

#18174225
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23664) - you deserved it (3466)

On 11/06/2011 at 12:43pm - health - by panickygrl (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I walked in on my daughter trying to blow-dry the sweat off her armpits instead of showering. FML

#19454762
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23663) - you deserved it (2747)

On 04/12/2012 at 8:51am - misc - by crazydaughter - Egypt



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