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Today, I was out to coffee with an extremely attractive friend. A crazy man came up to the window we were facing. He took one look at her, then turned to me with a big, congratulatory smile, flashing me a thumbs-up. Then he turned to her, frowned disappointedly and gave a thumbs-down. FML

#19785807
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22356) - you deserved it (2003)

On 06/14/2012 at 4:11am - misc - by offended (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend drunkenly decided to let his friends cut his hair into a mullet. He won't change it. I'm supposed to introduce him to my family. FML

#13775223
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22356) - you deserved it (3838)

On 11/09/2010 at 7:02am - misc - by botheredgf (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I was using a power drill to take down the set for the musical we just finished. My long hair got caught in the drill, got ripped out and now I have a hurting, bleeding bald spot the size of 2 quarters. FML

#8963973
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22354) - you deserved it (12354)

On 03/10/2010 at 1:11am - misc - by bdavis - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while scrubbing my car with the foam brush at a car wash, the hose for the brush came whipping around and smacked me hard in the side of the head, knocking off my glasses. I got disoriented from the blow and stepped on my glasses, completely smashing them. FML

#13041055
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22354) - you deserved it (2876)

On 09/13/2010 at 10:00pm - misc - by IHateMyJob - United States

Today, my boss fired me because "I didn't get the right kind of coffee beans." FML

#8837670
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22353) - you deserved it (3349)

On 03/05/2010 at 12:23am - work - by koletatlow19 - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I broke my wrist because a Nutella glass fell on it after I opened the cupboard. FML

#7478181
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22349) - you deserved it (4358)

On 01/21/2010 at 5:17pm - misc - by diorlove - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was on a plane. When my flight attendant brought me my drink, it had a lid and a straw. He told me, very seriously, "not to spill." No one else got a lid. I'm 18, and apparently I look spill-prone. FML

#14604912
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22349) - you deserved it (2977)

On 01/16/2011 at 8:37pm - misc - by thisisme (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I broke my little toe. It got stuck in my panties as I struggled to get a leg through. FML

#19283083
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22348) - you deserved it (5828) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/15/2012 at 3:28pm - health - by Sica - France

Today, my teacher started talking about me quietly to the stuffed cat, called Rufus, that she keeps on her desk. FML

#18763079
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22347) - you deserved it (2047)

On 01/10/2012 at 12:25am - work - by jumbledgirl (woman) - United States

Today, I was walking down the hallway when someone opened a door, smashing it into me. The bump makes it look like I have a third boob. FML

#9158160
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22343) - you deserved it (3489)

On 03/17/2010 at 12:16pm - health - by Ouch (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was having a race with a little kid. I let him win to make him feel like a champion. After the race, he turned to me and said, "Maybe if you weren't so fat you would have won." FML

#20081429
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22342) - you deserved it (3892)

On 09/20/2012 at 10:40pm - kids - by tiredeolfatty (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, a drunk truck driver taught me a very valuable lesson: Never tie your shoelaces in the middle of a parking lot. FML

Today, I went to a dance and saw a really cute guy. Glow sticks were everywhere, so trying to be cute, I took a broken one and dripped some of the glowing liquid on my chest. It made him notice me, but only for him to point out that I'd managed to cut myself and was bleeding badly. FML

#20801095
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22341) - you deserved it (46751)

On 07/24/2013 at 12:05pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)



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