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Today, I walked in on my fifteen-year-old son and his friends attempting to set up a rudimentary meth lab in his bedroom. I'm not sure whether to be angrier that they simply tried this, or that they thought burning up baking soda would somehow produce methamphetamine. FML

#20017485
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24021) - you deserved it (2391)

On 08/12/2012 at 8:49pm - kids - by JAdams (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML

#20132312
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24019) - you deserved it (16537)

On 10/25/2012 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I received a phone call from my father asking how I spelled my name. Not only was he the parent who picked out my name, he was completely serious. FML

#8886558
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24018) - you deserved it (1712)

On 03/07/2010 at 3:18am - misc - by crimson28 (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I popped a zit and I went to put my acne medicine on it. It's in a clear bottle with a blue cap, just like the nearby nailpolish remover. I grabbed the wrong one. FML

#12685763
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24017) - you deserved it (13143)

On 08/22/2010 at 5:20pm - misc - by inseriouspain (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my family is on the third day of driving cross country. My husband is still pretending he is driving on a NASCAR track, sound effects and all. FML

#17192528
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24017) - you deserved it (4059)

On 07/20/2011 at 4:18pm - misc - by Stacy Dee - United States

Today, my mum found out she's pregnant. I would be happy for her, if she knew who the father was. FML

#20060753
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24019) - you deserved it (1692)

On 09/06/2012 at 6:21pm - health - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, when I woke up, I noticed something crawling on my bed. A white faced wasp was dragging the corpse of a rather large spider. I'm not sure what I was more disturbed about; the fact that the wasp was dragging something twice its size, or that these bugs even live in my house. FML

#19942968
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24017) - you deserved it (1805)

On 07/15/2012 at 10:00pm - misc - by klanciee - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got up and left for work despite being really sick, because I had a big meeting. Halfway to work, in deadlocked traffic, my boss texts me to let me know he's rescheduling the meeting to tomorrow because of personal conflicts. FML

#13336627
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24015) - you deserved it (2494)

On 10/05/2010 at 11:20pm - work - by sick (woman) - United States

Today, I went to the store with my girlfriend. She needed to use the bathroom so I started looking at the books. It wasn't until the manager shot me a weird look that I realized I'd wandered down too far and was looking at bridal magazines, holding tampons, dog treats, and hair spray. FML

#18036451
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24014) - you deserved it (4340)

On 10/21/2011 at 1:42am - animals - by Dv0829 - United States (Utah)

Today, I was putting a new lightbulb in when my wife walks into the room and says "you can't see a thing, i'll turn the light on for you". And she did. FML

#981
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24014) - you deserved it (1877)

On 01/11/2009 at 11:35pm - misc - by Christoams - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had to sneak out of work to get my daughter from her school. Apparently, she had thought that hurling a bowling ball down the stairs during the lunch hour rush would make her cool. In actual fact, it made her expelled. FML

#19704812
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24012) - you deserved it (2620)

On 05/30/2012 at 2:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Vale of Glamorgan, The)

Today, while serving a rather large party at the restaurant where I work, I mentioned that the soup of the day was "to die for". After the hosts gave me weird looks, it dawned on me that the reason they were wearing all black is because they've just come back from a funeral. FML

#8372297
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24009) - you deserved it (10509)

On 02/17/2010 at 11:32am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, 30 minutes before I was supposed to quit work at 6pm, my boss showed up. After telling him how the day went, he asked why I was still there. Apparently, for the holiday, we close early. 4 hours earlier. FML

#16981482
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24009) - you deserved it (6835)

On 07/05/2011 at 1:34am - work - by worksucker - United States (Texas)



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