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Today, we had our first rainstorm in weeks. Thirty seconds before it started, my window broke in the "down" position from overuse, since last week the air conditioning in my car gave out. Now I have a hot, wet car. FML

#12431823
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21358) - you deserved it (2755)

On 08/10/2010 at 12:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had surgery on my arm. My mom has recently had the same surgery and my dad is having his first rib removed and won't be able to move his arm. My family combined now has three functioning arms. FML

#20142449
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21358) - you deserved it (1472)

On 11/01/2012 at 1:08am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was half asleep and tried to cuddle my husband as we slept. Still dreaming, he yelled for me to leave his money alone. FML

#19249177
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21357) - you deserved it (4187)

On 03/10/2012 at 1:04am - love - by atsukobo - United States

Today, it's my sixth day taking care of my family's seven animals while my parents are in Singapore. So far, I've emergency-called the vet twice, taken a dog to the vet once, and cleaned up liquid dog shit five times. FML

#20197436
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21353) - you deserved it (2373)

On 12/09/2012 at 8:18am - animals - by KennyDidIt - United States (Alabama)

Today, my dog was barking at a squirrel in the yard. I opened the door to let him chase the squirrel. I went to look at the dead squirrel and found out it was the neighbor's chihuahua. FML

#15714709
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21351) - you deserved it (36382)

On 04/09/2011 at 8:58pm - animals - by Sid (man) - United States (California)

Today, while driving home, I realized I forgot my house key. Luckily, when I arrived home, someone had already broken into my house. Guess I didn't need the key. FML

#19486401
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21351) - you deserved it (1634)

On 04/17/2012 at 8:55pm - misc - by yuuupyup - United States (New Jersey)

Today, taking the train to work after the worst hangover ever, two immense fat women start talking about rim jobs. I got up to switch cabins just in time for their conversation to switch over to RECEIVING rim jobs. I sprayed puke all over myself and an innocent bystander. FML

#857
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21350) - you deserved it (3733)

On 01/08/2009 at 6:21am - health - by depraved - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got pulled over for drunk driving. This is the second time its happened. I was completely sober both times. FML

#19276070
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21350) - you deserved it (14361)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, at work, a regular started talking to me. Subject of choice? His overwhelming amount of earwax. Apparently he'd like to make a candle out of it once he goes to the doctor to get it removed. FML

#17106852
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21350) - you deserved it (1926)

On 07/14/2011 at 11:25am - work - by Breanne - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I had to X-ray an 81 year old lady. The clothes she was wearing would show up on the X-ray so I had to make her change into a gown. I found out the hard way that 81 year olds still go commando. FML

#8369327
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21347) - you deserved it (2594)

On 02/17/2010 at 7:50am - work - by ugamayne - United States (Maryland)

Today, I bought a new Siamese Fighting Fish. I was so happy with my new fish so I bought him an expensive lovely bowl, some weeds, and a toy for the bowl. I left the room to get the fish food. When I returned, the fish was gone, and the cat was sitting on the table. FML

#7156586
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21346) - you deserved it (8105)

On 01/05/2010 at 12:15am - animals - by bels12 (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I remembered my mom got her carpet cleaned and to be careful while she was at work. To be nice, I vacuumed the whole house. Feeling proud of myself, I got a drink and went upstairs. I tripped and spilled red Kool-Aid all over the floor. FML

#6976718
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21342) - you deserved it (12552)

On 12/27/2009 at 5:25pm - misc - by xMiSS_CuTiEx (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while babysitting, I brought over some colouring-in sheets as an activity. I said that I should bring some Christmas-themed ones for next time. The little girl then turned to me and said "If there is a next time." I've been put on probation by an 8-year-old. FML

#13936248
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21341) - you deserved it (3596)

On 11/22/2010 at 11:33am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)



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  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

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