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Today, I used a public bathroom and set my motorcycle helmet on the sink while I used the urinal. The helmet rolled into the sink, under the faucet and set off the motion detector, soaking the inside. I drove 15 miles home in 30 degree weather with a wet helmet. FML

#7351038
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20709) - you deserved it (8289)

On 01/15/2010 at 12:04am - misc - by RyanSmithN (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I came home from work to find my house was flooded from a broken pipe under the sink. My house had just recently had new wood floors, carpet and electrics installed because 6 months earlier my house had been flooded by the same pipe breaking. FML

#20047256
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20708) - you deserved it (2421)

On 08/29/2012 at 12:19am - misc - by me - United States (Minnesota)

Today, due to a combination of boredom and a faulty hair dryer, I now have singed pubes and burned balls. FML

#21096245
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20705) - you deserved it (48637)

On 03/25/2014 at 5:20pm - intimacy - by testacular (man) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)

Today, I was operating on a young girl, when she began to awaken during the surgery. We quickly put her back under, of course, but now I'm terrified that she'll remember my profuse cursing and get me in the shit with my curmudgeonly killjoy of a boss. FML

#19727538
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20702) - you deserved it (9937)

On 06/03/2012 at 4:27pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I received the "employee of the month" title from the job I was fired from last week. FML

#20059608
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20702) - you deserved it (1416)

On 09/05/2012 at 10:02pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I finally discovered the reason my front room smelt funny. My dog, thinking the Christmas tree was real, has been peeing on it for the past two weeks. FML

#7053849
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20701) - you deserved it (4493)

On 12/31/2009 at 8:28am - animals - by brokenrainbow. (woman) - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, I had my first ice skating lesson. I had to wait 5 years for a rink to open in my town, 2 weeks for my lessons to begin, but only 10 minutes to fall and hit my tailbone so hard that I can't walk. FML

#8300373
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20700) - you deserved it (3599)

On 02/15/2010 at 1:40pm - health - by skatergrrrl (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, after much debate, my husband convinced me to let his scumbag brother babysit our seven-year-old son while we went out to a restaurant. When we got home, we found him teaching our son how to pick the lock to our liquor cabinet. My husband is unapologetic. FML

#20014051
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20700) - you deserved it (3406)

On 08/10/2012 at 7:59pm - kids - by shira512 (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, it was my 2 year anniversary with my boyfriend. As we were about to exchange gifts, he got a call and said he had to go home immediately. What was the emergency? His guild leader couldn't find another healer to finish a raid and promised my boyfriend gear if he would step up. FML

#20120587
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20696) - you deserved it (4069)

On 10/17/2012 at 1:16am - love - by Marie (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend and I got into a heated argument at a house party. To avoid a huge scene, I pulled her into another room, during which I managed to trip over my feet and faceplant the floor. She shouted, "Hah! That's what you get!" Now everyone thinks she beat the shit out of me. FML

#19981825
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20695) - you deserved it (4770)

On 07/24/2012 at 4:08pm - health - by *facefloor* (man) - United States

Today, a picture fell off of the wall in the middle of the night. It hit me smack bang in the middle of face. FML

#8403549
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20694) - you deserved it (3214)

On 02/18/2010 at 9:22am - health - by Hayleey_079 (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, my girlfriend tried to convince me that she never takes dumps. I told her that as long as she eats, it's a biological impossibility, but she seems to have genuinely deluded herself into thinking it's true, purely because she is a girl. FML

#19997167
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20694) - you deserved it (2794)

On 08/01/2012 at 8:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I found out that one of my university flatmates arrived early for Freshers Week, and had a party which involved the place being trashed. I'm going to lose some of my deposit for damage caused before I even arrived. FML

#17759197
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20688) - you deserved it (1835)

On 09/16/2011 at 6:10pm - misc - by Authentik8 (man) - United Kingdom (Croydon)



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