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Today, I was babysitting. The kid said he had to use the bathroom. When I told him to go ahead, he said he just did. He was on my lap. He wasn't wearing pants. FML

#8125309
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23188) - you deserved it (7240)

On 02/11/2010 at 8:33am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I returned from vacation. Because of rain, I spent 3 days sitting in a hotel room, watching a TV with bad reception. I'm now less relaxed that if I'd have just stayed home, because that wouldn't have cost me $500, and my TV has more than 15 channels. So much for my first vacation in 5 years. FML

#13584749
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23188) - you deserved it (4666)

On 10/25/2010 at 12:22am - misc - by not_relaxed (man) - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on a homeless guy peeing on a turd on the floor of the women's restroom at the park. I'm a janitor for the city. FML

#19393647
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23191) - you deserved it (2004)

On 04/02/2012 at 4:38am - work - by minimum wage (man) - Canada

Today, my kitchen sink was clogged. I poured a bottle of Drano down and came back two hours later. The clog is still there, but the glue on the pipe is not and now there is Drano-water all over the floor, staining and dissolving everything in my kitchen. FML

#10615901
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23187) - you deserved it (6556)

On 05/18/2010 at 9:23pm - misc - by MisterT (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boss made me run yet another stupid errand. When I delivered the paperwork to his office, I saw an email printout on his desk. Apparently, he has a plan in the works to get me "fried" next month. I'm not sure whether to give him a letter of resignation or a bottle of barbecue sauce. FML

#18088361
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23185) - you deserved it (2351)

On 10/27/2011 at 12:15pm - work - by last literate - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I had to lie to my boyfriend about having plans on tonight so he'd think I had a life outside of him. All my "friends" are going to a party. I'm not invited. FML

#7512878
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23184) - you deserved it (6182)

On 01/23/2010 at 12:04am - love - by voltronn - Sent from mobile version

Today, in science class, we had to make play-dough with our lab partners. We were allowed to put one thing in it to make it more bouncy or rubbery. My partner said that he wanted to put a chicken wing in ours. FML

#18374727
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23179) - you deserved it (2945)

On 11/28/2011 at 10:45am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my cat went into labor. This is surprising since 6 years ago, we paid to have her spayed. FML

#20174337
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23179) - you deserved it (1655)

On 11/22/2012 at 8:34pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, my boyfriend discovered you can send sound clips as text messages. So far I've heard 5 of his farts in the past half hour. FML

#19315515
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23177) - you deserved it (3469)

On 03/20/2012 at 6:33pm - love - by anonymous - Canada (Newfoundland)

Today, my son and I attended the funeral of a family friend. It went as well as any funeral could, up until the point that my apparently drunk son tried to grope the widow. I came an inch away from causing my son to need his own funeral. FML

#19834140
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23177) - you deserved it (2453)

On 06/23/2012 at 1:43pm - kids - by nosonofmine (man) - Iceland (Gullbringusysla)

Today, while in my drama class, my character in a play has to quickly jump up out from his desk. Somehow, my shirt got caught on the desk, ripping it almost completely off in front of a live audience. FML

#13810188
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23175) - you deserved it (2747)

On 11/12/2010 at 12:41am - misc - by me - United States

Today, it finally clicked in my mind how desperately lonely I am, when I shaved one of my legs just to find out what a woman's leg feels like. FML

#20022524
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23172) - you deserved it (7888)

On 08/15/2012 at 12:46pm - love - by lonely. (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went out for pizza with my boyfriend. He loaned me his debit card and loudly announced in front of everyone that his pin code was the numerical equivalent of "Fart", and repeated it twice, just in case I hadn't heard. FML

#14969224
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23172) - you deserved it (3491)

On 02/14/2011 at 2:14am - misc - by datingamoron (woman) - United States (Washington)



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