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Today, I discovered that instead of being a harmless way to relax after a rough day, parking in an empty lot apparently means you are either dealing drugs or want to commit suicide. I was detained, my car was searched and I was grilled about my happiness. Great stress relief, eh? FML

Today, with the cost of craft supplies that ended in a DIY fail, then a costume and overnight shipping, I have now spent $90 to obtain a $10 hat and vest for my daughter to play a cow in the school Christmas play. She will say "Moo" three times with 5 other cows before leaving the stage. FML

#18597076
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23285) - you deserved it (7139)

On 12/24/2011 at 9:38am - kids - by Broke Mama (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was messing around with my boyfriend, trying to get him to tell me he loved me more than KISS, his favorite band. He couldn't do it. FML

#6985452
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23284) - you deserved it (10509)

On 12/28/2009 at 1:13am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I watched my car roll backwards on the freeway, while attached to the tow truck that I was sitting in. FML

#6144396
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23284) - you deserved it (2004)

On 11/03/2009 at 11:06pm - misc - by ljd09 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that my baby stops crying loudly whenever I turn on the vacuum cleaner. I'm either stuck with a fussy baby all day, or the roaring sound of a vacuum cleaner. FML

#10521391
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23280) - you deserved it (4674)

On 05/14/2010 at 1:01am - misc - by superhero1043 (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my mom admitted that she always makes me put away the dishes because my obsessive compulsive tendencies force me to arrange the glasses and silverware by size, just the way she likes them. FML

#17747814
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23281) - you deserved it (4526)

On 09/14/2011 at 10:35pm - misc - by Awesome. (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was taking a shower. My mom thinks it's ok to just walk in on someone when they are in there so she decides to take a crap. The worst part is she thought it would be less awkward to talk to me. FML

#19754526
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23280) - you deserved it (2247)

On 06/08/2012 at 10:00am - misc - by me - United States (New York)

Today, while working out in the gym, I spotted a very attractive girl. I decided to pick up the heaviest dumbbell to show off how much I could curl. She ended up driving me to the hospital because I burst into tears after tearing up my bicep and deltoid. FML

#20831608
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23279) - you deserved it (60713)

On 08/11/2013 at 12:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it appears that it's Single Loser Awareness Day. FML

#19073057
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23279) - you deserved it (5993)

On 02/14/2012 at 10:32am - love - by crazytown62 - United States

Today, at work, I screamed, used one of my employees as a human shield, dove for cover, and cried. Why? A bat flew into my store. Bats scare me shitless. FML

#6342558
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23277) - you deserved it (9056)

On 11/17/2009 at 3:55pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I found out my best friend has a massive head lice infestation. It wasn't until after I'd used her hairbrush to brush my hair that I figured it out. FML

#14018478
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23278) - you deserved it (6468)

On 11/29/2010 at 12:03am - health - by caliibbyy -

Today, I was badly sunburnt even after making it a point to apply a lot of sunscreen. My coworkers thought it amusing to slap me every chance they get. FML

#17820247
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23276) - you deserved it (4200)

On 09/24/2011 at 11:22am - work - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML

#8741180
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23274) - you deserved it (7547)

On 03/01/2010 at 2:30am - intimacy - by Lovejunkie (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)



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