melful

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Melful's favorite FMLs

Red flag

By Anonymous - 15/01/2014 18:25 - Italy - Pistoia

Today, I found out that the generous gift from my boyfriend of a new iPhone was only given so he could use the "Find my phone" function to make sure I'm always where I say I am each day. I'm being stalked by my own boyfriend. FML

agreeclassic 55 208

vote type 1 8 958

By Tara115 - 09/02/2014 07:20 - Canada - Courtenay

Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't think he should marry me, because I have kids. They're his kids. FML

agreeclassic 59 293

vote type 1 7 597

By look before you speak - 09/02/2014 07:12 - United States

Today, I was at a swim meet. I asked my friend if he could be my wingman and help me get a date with a girl I really liked. I told him my plan, and as I finished and turned to go to her, I noticed her standing right there, listening in on the whole conversation. FML

agreeclassic 46 640

vote type 1 13 839

Who knows?

By Anonymous - 08/02/2014 18:49 - United States

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. My hand-eye coordination went straight to hell and I managed to accidentally smack my nose into his penis. He told all his friends about it, and I'm apparently now known as Woodpecker. FML

agreeclassic 55 799

vote type 1 11 087

By fuckmyplums - 07/02/2014 23:47 - Austria - Grossarl

Today, I worked up the nerve to ask my boss for a raise. Today is also the day I found out my boss has a shitlist of employees he wants to fire, and that I'm now on it. FML

agreeclassic 41 412

vote type 1 4 643