crispyjello69

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Crispyjello69's favorite FMLs

Oh, hai Mark

By sucky sucky - 07/07/2020 14:01

Today, my crush, who’s notorious for only dating skinny girls, walked out of the break room. I turned to my friend and joked, “I may not be skinny, but I can suck a jawbreaker through a boba straw!” Turns out he came back because he forgot his phone. He most definitely heard me. FML

agreeclassic 740

vote type 1 1 904

By hopeless - 28/03/2019 04:00 - United States - Bend

Today, my boyfriend of 2 months and I finally lost our virginity’s to each other, he broke up with me a day later and is now banging the chick he told me “not to worry about”. FML

agreeclassic 2 128

vote type 1 358

By whosurdaddy - 06/01/2017 06:44

Today, I'm attending a party where drunken women just can't seem to keep their clothes on. Those drunken women are my daughters. FML

agreeclassic 9 102

vote type 1 1 451

By mybfthecrossdresser - 20/01/2015 15:08 - Australia - Scarborough

Today, I found out my boyfriend dresses in my underwear and tights, takes suggestive shots of his ass and legs, and uses them to trick people into thinking he's a girl so they buy him stuff in his online games. FML

agreeclassic 36 965

vote type 1 4 008

Wait, what?

By HereToLaughAtU - this FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Des Moines

Today, a customer said the pants she was buying rang up more than advertised. I quietly told her plus-sizes were not on sale. The customer yelled in front of a whole line of people, "So I'm fat and can't read! Any other insults you'd like to throw at me?" and stormed out of the store. FML

agreeclassic 37 896

vote type 1 4 903