Today, my pyromaniac sister somehow got her hands on my dad's lighter and set my bed sheets on fire. My dad said I must have provoked her, and that she can't be blamed for her mental condition. So now I'm grounded, and she has a new doll house to calm her down. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I found out my little sister is a pyromaniac. She set my bed on fire. FML
Twisted firestarter
Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML
Today, my dad set my hair on fire while cooking. He then tried to convince me that it spontaneously combusted. FML
Helicopter
Today, my mother scolded me for having a lighter in my room. My reason I had it? The candle that she bought me for my 25th birthday. I don't even live with her anymore, she showed up uninvited, and started going through my stuff. FML
Today, at a candlelit dinner, I accidentally set my dad's leg on fire. FML
Today, my little sister asked what the noises were last night. It happened to be my dad and his girlfriend fooling around. I ended up telling her it was ghosts. Now I'm grounded by my dad who yelled at me for scaring her. I was trying to save his ass from a lot of questions. FML
Today, my daughter tried to cover up her relapse into pyromania by explaining to me that the reason our carpet caught on fire was because a hot coal somehow worked its way free from the fireplace. Our fireplace is electric. FML
Pyrotechnics
Today, after I told my roommate last week she needed to find a new place to live because I thought she was psychotic, she set my house on fire. FML
Today, my sister smashed a cup on my head because I told her she couldn't borrow one of my necklaces since she lost one and stole another. I was grounded for "antagonizing" her into doing it. FML
Today, I asked my lazy daughter to go make her bed. She responded by lighting our garbage bin on fire. FML
Top comments
HAMY_fml 23
That's some great parenting. sorry about the bed op
james98e 15
If I were you, I'd be up in flames!
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Comments (128)
TomeDr 25
Right there's the definition of "enabler".
sstahpp 33
Better put the fire department on speed dial.
MediocreMan19 18
Time to pack up and leave, you shouldn't be punished for your sister's actions
danceinconverse 25
Tell him to stop enabling her, it will only make her condition worse.
Droneman 17
Same thing happened to me when my brother used to torture our hamster and I was the one getting in trouble for telling my parents. My parents let him get away with just about anything and reward him for little things he does just because he had social anxiety and does weird shit.
msmedieval 11
I have social anxiety & would never hurt anyone! Your brother sounds like he might have sociopathy or something similar.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Uh, yeah... Torturing animals is a sign of deep-seated emotional issues and is an early sign of serious psychopathy. Most serial killers begin killing and torturing animals at a young age. So #26 I truly hope your brother is getting some help, because he wasn't harming animals due to his anxiety, that much is for sure.
PlayLikeAChamp6 1
Didn't Rihanna make a music video like this?
Sagedrop 10
Unless you are referring to the song "The Monster" featuring Eminem, I don't think so.
bad_timing_alot 6
Love the way you lie. I think that's what you are referring too.
julianrey15 4
that's the type of parenting shit I hate
jibri21 7
that's the kinda parenting that makes murders , next it's gonna be the neighbors cat provoked her
quesok 22
let it gooooo, let it burnnnnn... do you want to build a fireman?
WhimsicalMusings 11
Wait...your father left a LIGHTER within reach of his fire-obsessed, potentially dangerous daughter and YOU were grounded? Sorry OP. I get the feeling you should contact someone about this - it's not just a case of parental unfairness, your dad could potentially get you killed, especially if he enables her like this. I'm just not sure who could help. Social services or even the police might well have something to say, but many people think that they do more harm than good. Perhaps a therapist or doctor might be able to smack it into your dad's head that "making allowances" doesn't translate to "don't punish her for arson."
Brandi_Faith 34
I completely agree! If I were op, I'd have a serious talk with my dad saying that he's enabling her. I would tell him that she's dangerous and it was his fault for leaving his lighter where she could get it. I would tell him he absolutely has to get her help, or next time I would be calling the cops. He needs to know that this will only escalate and someone could get seriously injured or die. That crap is serious and dangerous, and if calling the cops, fireman, or social services is what it takes, I would seriously consider doing it. Op & their parents should be afraid for their lives. I'd be afraid she's going to light something while we're all sleeping!
Taurus_ChicKa 37
This bed is on fiiiiire! But seriously, that is screwed up. Parents like that piss me off. I don't care if your kid has some mental condition; you don't leave a lighter within arm's reach of a pyro, and you don't blame the other kid for their misconduct! This is why kids get away with everything and have no respect these days - lousy parenting.