ILiveWithMorons
United States
Today, my dad set my hair on fire while cooking. He then tried to convince me that it spontaneously combusted. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam
Today, at a candlelit dinner, I accidentally set my dad's leg on fire. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff
United States
Twisted firestarter
Today, my daughter somehow got a hold of the lighter we keep on top of the fridge. I found this out when she snuck up behind me and thought it would be fun to set my hair on fire. FML
inalotofpain
United States
Today, while relaxing in the kitchen drinking coffee, my dad suddenly rushed in, knocking me over and causing me to spill boiling hot coffee all over myself. Then, my dad thought it would be a good idea to grab the sprayer from the sink and douse me with cold water in order to "put me out." FML
cnkk07
United States
Today, my dad used the stove to boil water. Unfortunately, he turned the wrong burner on, setting the smoke alarm off. What's worse was the smell of burning plastic that came from the coffeemaker being melted down. It's been over an hour, and my eyes still burn like hell when I walk into the kitchen. FML
SadDad
Alexandria, United States
Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML
Todd
United States
Today, my dad got so drunk that he had an intense argument with the microwave, resulting in him threatening to ground me after I tried to calm him down. FML
Wtfbruhimmovingout
Toronto, Canada
Today, my mom tried to burn my arm with a hot spatula, all because I got a tattoo against her wishes. FML
Anonymous
Madison, United States
Today, my pyromaniac sister somehow got her hands on my dad's lighter and set my bed sheets on fire. My dad said I must have provoked her, and that she can't be blamed for her mental condition. So now I'm grounded, and she has a new doll house to calm her down. FML
blahblahblah
Heart of Glass
Today, I was sitting on a stool by the stove while my dad was making stir-fry. The glass lid he had covering the skillet overheated and exploded. As huge shards of broken glass rained down on his only daughter's head, my dad's only concern was whether or not he would have to throw his food away. FML
ZeroApostle4Ever
United States
Today, my dad threw a waffle at my face for his own amusement. FML
Top comments
DoubleEdgedBlade 4
Bad hair day?
LifeSucksbtw 0
hahaha
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Comments (121)
DoubleEdgedBlade 4
Bad hair day?
largefoofighter 0
that's better than fire crotch
trick619 0
chaffing can lead to spontaneous pubic hair combustion, poor fat people ha
DropDead77 11
Time to give up the Jewfro son
Heather_x0x0 6
seriously 23???
Finn_the_human 5
Die Fire!
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
if you can't handle the heat gtfo of the kitchen
FunnyGuy5051 7
as long as she's in the kitchen... jk
ImmortalKratos 0
33. your kidding right? everyone knows that it's impossible cuz all the sweat wouldn't let enough friction build up. p.s. is that your natural hair color?
gutzz 0
No 40, there are studies proving it, they have naked fat people run on treadmills for a long period of time. It has been determined that spontaneous pubic hair combustion is a symptom of burning calories in 100% of all obese individuals.
Alliria 3
No. 44 If that does make people combust, why isn't 'The Biggest Loser' more interesting?
zourwolfe 0
56 epic win
insanesna1l 0
its all true, from the spontaneous combustion caused by pubic friction, to midgets freezing instantly in cold weather due to heat rising
dre_bro11 12
56, I'm taking a wild stab in the dark here, but maybe 'cause it's a family tv show?
Insane_Tea 15
Fap Fap If spontaneous pubic hair combustion were true, then why aren't all the little twelve year olds exploding like pop rocks? Fap Fap Fap Fap Fap...........
LifeSucksbtw 0
hahaha
DropDead77 11
agreed^
C6Racer 0
Oh so close.
gutzz 0
36- I know right? It's funny when it's obvious.
tulsafml 0
maybe op should stop putting so much mother ******* grease in her hair
minidinosaurgoes 9
^his hair
brit4nyxbabii 0
LAWWWL .
Trupe 3
Lol I'm hoping he didn't convince you.
CareFace 16
You look like you could convince ANYONE.
grigri75 35
it sounds quite reasonable
random_ribbons 15
Wow... I really hope you didn't believe him. Even more than that, I hope he didn't really believe that.
Tuesdays76 0
The truth is op's dad thought the hair was too long, so he took matters into his own hands.
Southerndatageek 2
Gives a new meaning to flaming red hair.
gutzz 0
And this gives a new meaning to bad jokes.
PSQ91 6
I second that
tommygun7217 0
its actually funny, u guys just dont undersatnd humour about red heads /:
ImaWiseGuy 5
gingers have no souls......
minidinosaurgoes 9
^your moms a ginger?
grigri75 35
this joke is so bad, it made me laugh (at least a bit)
italiangurrl 8
best thing I heard all day lol
Thanatos1206 0
Did somebody read this aloud to you?
gutzz 0
^ nice.
FNFPhilly 0
39 just made you wanna go de in a hole LOL
CaptinFalconKnig 6
lmao de in a hole xD
clojo1112 0
invest in wigs?
TaylorTotsYumm 10
I bet your hair looks hot.
bubulz_fml 0
looks hot feels hot smells hot... lol
kayPandastyle 15
Haha I love your icon..whered you find that? Lol
TheFection 0
college humor has this ongoing thing of cartoon college. I always laugh my ass off.
mcrepas 19
Good thing you didn't have any hair spray in your hair, it would have been all gone!
RobboXD 5
flame on?
skizza_fml 3
I was gunna say that, beat me too it damn you
Tcaret300 12
flame off... a few mins later with no hair, but water all over u. :)