Today, I had sex with my girlfriend. This is the seventh time in a row that she hasn't moved or made any noises the entire way through. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I made love to my girlfriend. I penetrated her for a while, then stopped to get my breath back... She carried on moaning even though I'd stopped moving. FML
Today, my girlfriend fell asleep during sex. This isn't the first time. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were making out, and about to have sex, when she asked me to "do that thing we did yesterday". We haven't had sex in 6 days. FML
Today, in the middle of having sex, my girlfriend stopped moaning. I asked what was wrong. She said, "I'm bored." FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Its was pretty good and heavy and she was moaning nicely. Then her moans got softer and softer and then nothing. She fell asleep. FML
Today, my girlfriend were having sex. When I finished, she whispered in my ear, "30 seconds." FML
Today, my girlfriend of a year and I had sex for the first time in several weeks due to relationship problems; I came in less than 10 seconds. We're still having problems. FML
Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML
Today my girlfriend actually moved during sex. I love her, but she's so awful in bed. FML
Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML
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Top comments
kg163401 0
I dub thee corpse ******
yazah 0
Try deflating her and then blowing her back up. :)
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Comments (404)
blackfox123 13
Haha
hethought 7
maybe you should see what feels good for her.
Mr_Scissors 9
Dead fish
cdncw 20
Starfish!!! But seriously, sounds like you're boring in bed. In my experience, even the most devout starfish can be enticed to become more active in the sack...
N0RealName 4
seriously, i found out my ex best friend does this every time she has sex, and thinks shes being sexy by grunting like shes being stabbed, and shes a ***** who burns through guys and would rather have sex than spend time with her partner.. doesnt mean your gf is cheating or youre boring her unless she never did this before, she may just be uninformed
AshPokemon 13
make her move. just give her an ****** beforehand (eat her out) and while you're doing the deed rub her ********. make her second ****** even bigger!
rorex 26
Take a hint and ask what she wants
LivingFail 7
So You notice her not being into it, not enjoying it and You keep going anyway?? Selfish much!?!
ErinShannon 27
Looks like you've got yourself a Starfish.
Joan Poette 5
MAYBE YOU SHOULD STOP THEN, YOU ****.