Dad jokes, Insulting and Kids: You can't say anything these days - FML

You can't say anything these days

By Ashley Marshburn - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my 4 year-old daughter walked into my home office and said, "Fuck you!" Then she ran to my husband and said, "Did I say it right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 580

You deserved it 5 356

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Top comments

Nyc__Princess 0

Sunday 17 October 2010 19:17

lol ! Don't blame her, she was just a messanger.

Lauren10102 3

Sunday 17 October 2010 19:17

Lighten up, it's a joke:)

Comments

saymynamess 19

Friday 31 July 2015 7:12

Nice hint OP's husband

tiptoppc 19

Monday 18 July 2022 20:39

Swearing isn’t anything but sounds and words. I don’t understand the taboo behind it, and can’t wait to teach my kids to swear in 10 languages. If people get offended by sounds, they must have a large stick up their ass cause there are certainly worse things to teach kids. Like how to fire guns at a young age..

Keywords

Love Video games Gamers Health Weird Gross First Dates Smells Parents Technology Kids Annoying Jealousy Dogs Animals AITA Pranks Dreams Family Geek Relatable Gun control Money Amazon Birthday Cute Awkward Abuse Social Media Scams

The Top

Today, I have a horribly painful throat infection and can't talk. In spite of this, Dad keeps insisting I call people for him, meaning I have to make use of a text to speech program. Eight out of twelve people I've called on his behalf have hung up, thinking I'm a scambot. Dad is blaming me for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 87

Today, I overheard my soon to be step-daughter telling her friend on the phone that she hopes that mine and her father's wedding is just a big joke, and that he isn't really going to go through with it. I just dropped five grand on a dress and venue. She's in for a surprise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 054

You deserved it 3 116

The Top

Today, I saw what my mom handed out for trick-or-treaters last night. Toothbrushes. Yup, we're that house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 758

You deserved it 3 524

Today, I went to Jack in The Box to grab a quick hamburger. I was in a hurry, so I didn't check my order. By the time I opened the bag, I was really hungry. Unfortunately, the burger looked like a 5-year-old wrapped it, and the burger looked bitten into. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 024

You deserved it 186

Today, I was waiting in the lobby of a modeling agency for my interview to be a potential model and I was next in line. They called "NEXT!" and I walked in with a smile on my face. They stared at my face for a moment and then started yelling "NEXT". FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 582

You deserved it 11 058

Today, I learned how awful intertrigo smells. I spent a ton of money and years of my life to become a health care provider apparently to treat the yeast infection between an obese woman's fat folds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 403

You deserved it 5 364

Today, I got a call from my mom-in-law saying I have to buy my own food. I took 3 weeks off on unpaid vacation and came out of state to watch my in-laws' house and dog sit while they go out of country. I'm not allowed to touch their food, even the spoiling stuff. My husband doesn't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 741

You deserved it 365

Today, my girlfriend was complaining that we don't have "a song". Irritated, I told her that I'd put on the radio, and whatever song was playing was our song from now on. I switched on the radio, and "It's Not Fair" by Lily Allen was playing. Our song is about premature ejaculation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 327

You deserved it 61 814