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Today, wanting to be on time for my first job interview, I woke up at the crack of dawn and walked almost an hour through a thunderstorm. When I arrived, I was told that the manager wasn't in today, because of the bad weather. FML

#20046195
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22910) - you deserved it (1722)

On 08/28/2012 at 12:56pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to the drugstore to get supplies for my broken toe. Because of the swelling, I could only wear open-toed sandals on this cold day. At the store, a tall, heavy man in winter boots tried to get by me, and ended up stepping on the toes of my good foot. FML

#7094930
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22909) - you deserved it (2183)

On 01/02/2010 at 12:26am - health - by ouchie (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, during my first man-to-man conversation with my girlfriend's father, he decided to mention the details of lion mating patterns he'd once witnessed. After a lengthy description of the lion's barbed penis, he said, "It also made me feel better about myself that I could last longer than a lion." FML

#19410282
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22908) - you deserved it (2281)

On 04/05/2012 at 1:11am - intimacy - by Lionman (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after calling the insurance plan for my new iPhone a "huge waste of money", I promptly dropped it in the store while trying to put it into my pocket, cracking the screen. FML

#20693016
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22908) - you deserved it (48136)

On 05/29/2013 at 12:24pm - money - by sammarli530 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realised the only preparation I've done for my final French exam has been wanking off to French porn. FML

#21135849
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22908) - you deserved it (53627)

On 05/10/2014 at 4:52pm - intimacy - by vivelawank - United Kingdom

Today, my parents were awake while I was still in bed on my iPod touch. I decided to play The Smurfs Village. One of its minigames involves shaking the iPod, so I was breathing heavily. Later, my parents sat me down for a little "talk". FML

#19833260
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22907) - you deserved it (7091)

On 06/23/2012 at 9:11am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend informed me that sharing a bed with me was like sleeping with a seizing cat. FML

#7330766
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22906) - you deserved it (4063)

On 01/13/2010 at 11:27pm - love - by meow (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I had pizza for lunch. Later, I passed out in front of a customer. Now I get to explain to my boss that I fainted on the job because of heartburn. FML

#21344355
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22905) - you deserved it (3927)

On 01/26/2015 at 1:55am - work - by Thisismylife (woman) - Canada

Today, I found out that one of my best mates had his backpack, clothes, and everything else in it stolen at an airport overseas. I was feeling sorry for him all day. It took me 9 hours to remember that I actually loaned him my backpack for his trip. FML

#12875277
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22903) - you deserved it (6694)

On 09/02/2010 at 8:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out, holding hands, and he was playing with a strand of my hair. I thought the whole thing was very romantic. He then said he loved how my mouth tasted like bacon. FML

#6061136
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22900) - you deserved it (6990)

On 10/29/2009 at 8:33pm - misc - by BaconBreathBlonde (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my grandma called me to tell me that a couple of cute boys stopped by her house to borrow something. She told them all about me, and that I would be interested in them. My love life is so pathetic, even my grandmother is trying to hook me up. FML

#8394792
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22900) - you deserved it (4182)

On 02/18/2010 at 12:07am - love - by loveless - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, as I go to a small private Christian college, the academic dean came up to me and asked me to put some old records on CD, since I have a record player that can do that. I had to listen to eight records of old students from the 1970's singing bible thumper Christian hippie music. FML

#15026784
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22900) - you deserved it (8959)

On 02/18/2011 at 10:25am - misc - by Shodan2112 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I have an ear infection. The pain from it radiates from my ear all the way down the left side of my face, so my doctor prescribed me something that makes half of my face numb and pretty much unusable. Tomorrow, I have to give a presentation on strokes for my med class. Go figure. FML

#20170659
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22900) - you deserved it (1516)

On 11/20/2012 at 5:41am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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