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Today, my dog somehow managed to swallow a ring that my mother had bought me. Now I must carefully poke and search through each pile of dog crap I find in my yard for the next week. FML

#19971657
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15879) - you deserved it (2207)

On 07/21/2012 at 11:58pm - animals - by summerbabe77 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was packing up my stuff about to go home. I shut off my MacBook but was still pretending to work for the last few minutes, typing on the keyboard. A good way through, I realized my co-worker sitting across from me could see that the Apple logo was off. FML

#20732510
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15877) - you deserved it (41194)

On 06/17/2013 at 8:55pm - work - by awk1 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was feeling sick, so I called my boyfriend who lives down the street to come and keep me company. He replied with, "no, I can't come over, I'm busy, I'm playing xbox." FML

#3102
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15869) - you deserved it (3144)

On 01/28/2009 at 2:51pm - love - by vidzgrl - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML

#16847763
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15869) - you deserved it (58100)

On 06/25/2011 at 9:39am - kids - by beekeke45 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my father, who is going through a serious mid-life crisis, walked into my room, told me to "sit the fuck down," and spent the next two hours ranting about how the Lord of the Rings books prophesy the end of the world this December, and that Sauron is an analogy for "corrupt bankers." FML

#19950706
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15870) - you deserved it (1219)

On 07/17/2012 at 4:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I met my boyfriend's grandma for the first time. Trying to make a good impression, I offered to wash the dishes. I accidentally broke the faucet. FML

#19994302
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15869) - you deserved it (2044)

On 07/31/2012 at 10:28am - misc - by gmd05 (woman) - United States

Today, while at work, I used the restroom. After I noticed we were out of paper towels, I just tried shaking my hands dry. I then readjusted my bra, since it'd been driving me crazy all day. After getting back to my cubicle, I realized that I had two wet handprints over my boobs. FML

#20007867
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15867) - you deserved it (10102)

On 08/07/2012 at 3:17pm - work - by Employee (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my mom decided to subtly bring up her desire for grandchildren. "You really need a girlfriend. I'm surprised you don't have a crippling case of Carpal Tunnel by now." FML

#20102423
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15866) - you deserved it (2430)

On 10/05/2012 at 1:59am - misc - by alittlepersonal (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was getting coffee with my aunt, and she asked me to pay. She then turned to the Barista and said, "He's never had a girlfriend before, and I wanted to show him that they take your money." The Barista laughed so hard she had to excuse herself. FML

#19603666
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15865) - you deserved it (1263)

On 05/10/2012 at 6:20pm - love - by brannonjames - United States

Today, one of the Haitians that works in the kitchen at my restaurant said something to me. Usually I can't understand them and I just smile and laugh, so that's what I did this time. Later, I found out he was trying to tell me his father had passed away. FML

#891545
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15863) - you deserved it (50687)

On 04/09/2009 at 8:13pm - work - by ohhhman (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I spent 30 minutes listening to my grandmother telling us that my cat is a medium. My boyfriend is totally convinced. FML

#14583588
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15858) - you deserved it (2248)

On 01/14/2011 at 11:24pm - animals - by inchetogb - United States (Kentucky)

Today, a girl I work with was talking to me in an Eeyore voice. I'm not sure if it's because she's sad and pathetic, or if she thinks I'm sad and pathetic. FML

#13155074
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15857) - you deserved it (3174)

On 09/22/2010 at 10:36am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my apartment has been echoing all day with the wails of my cat, Butters. He's yet again managed to trap himself in the umbrella stand. In the past, he has eventually gotten himself out, but this time I think I might have to use a hacksaw. FML

#19684579
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15856) - you deserved it (2577)

On 05/26/2012 at 5:35pm - misc - by Dom - South Africa (Eastern Cape)



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