Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I fell over a wet floor sign warning you not to fall over. The irony hurt more than the fall. FML

#14849029
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22293) - you deserved it (8972)

On 02/05/2011 at 4:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, my boyfriend accidentally broke my nose the day he was meeting my parents for the first time. FML

#19720513
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22293) - you deserved it (2090)

On 06/02/2012 at 11:34am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, Santa ran over my foot with a Segway. FML

#18435117
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22290) - you deserved it (2571)

On 12/05/2011 at 8:21am - misc - by areyouserial - United States

Today, I went on a date with a very cute girl. It went well, until I accidentally called the blueberries in her dessert Oran Berries. I sheepishly explained that they're a berry from the Pokémon universe, at which point she excused herself, never to return. FML

#20490478
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22287) - you deserved it (34544)

On 02/02/2013 at 4:20pm - love - by Brock (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, a classmate came up to me, quickly shoved a dollar bill down my shirt, threw her arms around me and told me to pretend I was her boyfriend to avoid some other guy. Sad thing is, this is the first girl I've hugged in ages. FML

#20100917
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22287) - you deserved it (2048)

On 10/04/2012 at 1:09am - love - by nonfreehugs (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my seven-year-old sister came to stay at my house for the night. She usually just sleepwalks. But tonight she sleep-peed in my clean clothes basket. FML

#7966871
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22285) - you deserved it (1995)

On 02/07/2010 at 7:31am - misc - by wallbanger - Australia (South Australia)

Today, not only did my boyfriend set my hair on fire, but he attempted to put it out by dumping bong water on my head. FML

#19631611
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22285) - you deserved it (9122)

On 05/16/2012 at 10:19am - love - by Coykoi - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I took my driver's test. I was confident and thought everything would go well. My boss ended up calling me several times during the test. Turns out my colleague never showed up to cover for me, and my boss blamed me. Not only did I fail my test, I'm now suspended from work too. FML

#20397879
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22287) - you deserved it (2289)

On 12/13/2012 at 12:04pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bromley)

Today, I spent two hours filling out an online application and questionnaire for a potential employer. The application stated that there were no right or wrong answers and to answer truthfully. I was automatically rejected. FML

#18853580
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22284) - you deserved it (4760)

On 01/19/2012 at 2:45pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)

Today, at school, I have to do a 45 minute presentation with a girl who has panic attacks so bad that she cries, runs out of the room, and sometimes passes out. This presentation terrifies her and it's a major part of my final grade. FML

#20192286
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22282) - you deserved it (2021)

On 12/05/2012 at 12:04pm - misc - by Murlocmurk - United States

Today, I went skinny-dipping with my friends. At one point, I jokingly pointed out how one of them had the smallest boobs of us all. She calmly got out of the pond, dried herself, scooped up our clothes and phones, and drove off in her car. The cops she called arrived soon after. FML

#20861665
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22282) - you deserved it (65478)

On 08/31/2013 at 12:25pm - misc - by criminal tit offender - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was asked to leave a church service for laughing at the kids trying to sing. FML

#20876850
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22282) - you deserved it (74804)

On 09/11/2013 at 9:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, my mum was saying she needs to gain weight because she was underweight according to her doctor. She then said she's going to eat like me in order to gain more weight. FML

#8047035
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22279) - you deserved it (6585)

On 02/09/2010 at 9:26am - health - by mynameislor - Canada (Ontario)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Idan Schneider's illustrated FML
  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: