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Today, I found out that my old roommate used to clean her goldfish bowl with my toothbrush. We lived together for six months. FML

#19287473
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20092) - you deserved it (1701)

On 03/16/2012 at 5:02am - misc - by disgusted - United States

Today, I was feeling a little racy and decided to send my boyfriend some naked pictures of myself. He responded, "That's OK, but does your face have to be in them?" FML

#6415998
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20089) - you deserved it (4243)

On 11/23/2009 at 12:07am - intimacy - by denise (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I decided to get my ass in shape and went to the gym. I got motion-sickness on the elliptical. FML

#18778182
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20086) - you deserved it (5115)

On 01/11/2012 at 7:31pm - health - by tbw (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I told my parents that I have a boyfriend. I was answering their questions about him, when my dad cut me off mid-sentence. He accused me of lying through my teeth, and said I'd based him off a character from a Harrison Ford movie. FML

#20083866
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20083) - you deserved it (2732)

On 09/22/2012 at 5:45pm - love - by busted (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I went to the airport to pick up my long distance boyfriend. Having waited six months for this, I was stoked. After waiting for three hours and sending numerous messages, I was eventually informed I was a week early. FML

#19880614
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20082) - you deserved it (12587)

On 07/02/2012 at 11:45am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my grandpa was visiting. My neighbors started blasting out rap music, as they've done nearly 24/7 for months, telling me to fuck off when I complain. He went over and screamed he'd gut them like fish if they didn't pipe down. They did. He's 68 and still more intimidating than me. FML

#20062193
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20083) - you deserved it (4312)

On 09/07/2012 at 6:59pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my car alarm went off so I went outside to investigate. Apparently, the abundant rain water in my street had swept a trash can five houses down, only to be stopped by my car. My bumper was dented by a run-away waste receptacle. FML

#7837909
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20081) - you deserved it (2129)

On 02/03/2010 at 1:27am - misc - by rainey (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at volleyball tryouts when I accidentally spiked the ball into the fire alarm. The fire fighters did not look happy when they found out what had happened. So much for being on the team. FML

#13187772
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20081) - you deserved it (3208)

On 09/24/2010 at 9:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was working in costume at a recreation of a Confederation-era town. I had to convince a visitor that it's not, in fact, an Amish village, and we do actually leave after five. FML

#17402357
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20079) - you deserved it (2442)

On 08/08/2011 at 12:07am - work - by a-mishunderstanding -

Today, my husband changed the voice on my car's GPS to Mr T's. I don't know how to change it back. I've been saying, "I pity the fool" over and over again ever since. FML

#18510240
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20076) - you deserved it (4881)

On 12/14/2011 at 9:06am - misc - by annoyed (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got a tattoo of the snake and staff medical symbol on my wrist. Now everyone keeps asking what illness I have; they think it's a medical bracelet substitute. FML

#20666917
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20077) - you deserved it (36158)

On 05/16/2013 at 11:01am - misc - by Calaraphea (woman) - United Kingdom (Warrington)

Today, I saw my crush walking on the other side of the street. She hadn't noticed me, so when she did I nonchalantly looked over and casually waved to look cool. I then walked right into a lamp post. FML

#2991516
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20071) - you deserved it (33995)

On 06/18/2009 at 10:04am - misc - by anonymous (man) - Norway (Akershus)

Today, after our old roommate left because he was too dirty for us to live with anymore, we found out that our new roommate has "borrowed" our shampoo, towel, toilet paper, liquor, without replacing them. I wish we still only had to clean up. FML

#17506977
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20071) - you deserved it (3766)

On 08/18/2011 at 2:59am - misc - by upset room mate - United States (Texas)



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