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Today, I had just reached in my purse without looking to grab a granola bar when my boss walked in my office. We talked for a few minutes as he kept giving me strange looks and looking at my hand. He left and I realized I hadn't taken a granola bar out, but a tampon instead. FML

#464994
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19569) - you deserved it (42873)

On 03/19/2009 at 12:41pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I realized just how bad my 28-year-old husband's gamer rage is when I came home to a smashed TV. This is the second TV in three months that he's destroyed. FML

#20080513
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19565) - you deserved it (3697)

On 09/20/2012 at 8:31am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had to take my husband to the hospital. He and his friends got the bright idea of recording a re-enactment of a scene from Fight Club for a YouTube video. It ended as soon as my husband caught a fist to the gut and started violently puking all over our basement floor. FML

#19782918
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19564) - you deserved it (2108)

On 06/13/2012 at 4:38pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands

Today, my boyfriend offered to give me a piggyback ride from the house to the car as means of avoiding walking in mud. Both aware of how tall he is, he crouched extra low and I jumped extra hard. This makes for a terrible example of leapfrog, and a faceplant in the mud. FML

#9087167
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19563) - you deserved it (7917)

On 03/14/2010 at 10:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I arrived home after a hard day's work to see my 12-year-old sister had greased up my 8-year-old brother with butter and olive oil, and was attempting to slide him down the wooden floorboards in the hallway. FML

#20161557
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19562) - you deserved it (1944)

On 11/13/2012 at 5:00am - kids - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, my car alarm went off at a funeral, three times. FML

#20070406
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19560) - you deserved it (3064)

On 09/13/2012 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, my boyfriend told me that every time he has sex with me he thinks about some mutant bunny chick from "Final Fantasy." FML

#6268793
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19560) - you deserved it (3481)

On 11/12/2009 at 2:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, my whole family piled into our station wagon just to watch my mom take part in an arm wrestling contest. FML

#17634077
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19560) - you deserved it (3265)

On 09/01/2011 at 5:55am - misc - by Chris75 - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was walking across a pedestrian crossing and waved at the driver of the car who'd stopped, just to say thank you. She stuck her middle finger up at me. FML

#19515959
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19560) - you deserved it (2428)

On 04/23/2012 at 9:00am - misc - by hoggypig -

Today, I received a text from my boyfriend telling me how much I wore him out the night before, from all the sex we were having. We had sex for two minutes. FML

#6612608
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19558) - you deserved it (2579)

On 12/05/2009 at 4:07am - intimacy - by lastalittlelonger (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was in church. After we were done praying, I quickly sat back down, accidentally crushing my testicles in the process. I squealed loudly and all but pissed my pants, earning me plenty of weird looks from the congregation. FML

#15574334
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19555) - you deserved it (21864)

On 03/31/2011 at 11:54am - misc - by Nate (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I bought my first iPhone. Today, I broke my first iPhone. FML

#19484468
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19555) - you deserved it (21680)

On 04/17/2012 at 3:23pm - misc - by phoneless - Jordan

Today, my boss came storming towards me, screaming just how tired she is with my constant bullshit. Already pissed off, I retorted that she's a bitch and should go lose some pounds. Turns out she was talking to her husband on her bluetooth headset. FML

#2147248
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19552) - you deserved it (69879)

On 05/21/2009 at 3:16pm - work - by unemployed (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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