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Today, I was riding my bike, when I saw a large dog sitting in front of a house. I started to really crank the pedals, figuring that by the time it saw me, I'd be long gone. My chain popped off, I lost control and crashed onto the side of the road. The dog hadn't moved. It was a statue. FML

#20510258
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23691) - you deserved it (19425)

On 02/17/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, the maintenance man 'fixed' a leak in my apartment by flooding the place. FML

#15744069
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23690) - you deserved it (2342)

On 04/11/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by sproket -

Today, my parents left on a trip. I wanted to invite my girlfriend over for a few days so we could spend them together. Then my grandparents turn up, "just for a few days, until your parents return, so you won't be alone in this big house." FML

#19566748
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23689) - you deserved it (3285)

On 05/03/2012 at 12:39am - love - by homealone (man) - Canada

Today, my 12 year-old dog died. My boyfriend's attempts to comfort me involved him muttering, "At least she knows how to play dead now." FML

#20071617
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23690) - you deserved it (2080)

On 09/14/2012 at 12:51pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had a volleyball game against our rivals. I hit myself in the face with the ball 3 times, fell flat on my face against the court, and later had an asthma attack with no inhaler in sight. We lost the game. FML

#12879741
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23689) - you deserved it (6014)

On 09/03/2010 at 1:05am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, a very pretty girl came up to me and asked me for my phone number. Very pleased, I give it to her with a huge smile and tell her that I can be reached at any time. I then watch her go back to her group of friends. My number was for her gay friend, who then meekly waved at me. FML

#718
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23687) - you deserved it (2806)

On 01/06/2009 at 6:58am - love - by musamalia - Sent from mobile version

Today, it's Saturday. While all my friends go out to have fun, I get my excitement thinking about how I'll be sleeping with a new pillow. FML

#6733477
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23687) - you deserved it (6115)

On 12/13/2009 at 2:14am - misc - by soy_un_perderdor (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got l disconnect notices for both my water and my electric. After looking over my budget, I realized that I can only pay for one until next month. FML

#7106186
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23687) - you deserved it (6864)

On 01/02/2010 at 3:27pm - money - by troubled - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mother-in-law said I wasn't the type she expected her son to marry, as he's always dated cheerleaders and model types. I must have looked offended, so she added, "I mean they weren't smart like you." So, I might be smart but I'm the ugliest girl my husband has ever been with. FML

#19879190
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23687) - you deserved it (2711)

On 07/02/2012 at 1:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I visited my grandparents' house. While getting a drink from the fridge, I noticed the Christmas card my family sent them had my face scratched out. When I confronted them about it, they said it was the cat. They don't have a cat. FML

#20445318
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23685) - you deserved it (1851)

On 01/06/2013 at 7:50pm - misc - by HatedGrandson - United States

Today, I learned that when your mom threatens to embarrass you by singing in public, the wrong response is, "Yeah? I dare you." FML

Today, I Googled "How to act like an adult." I'm 37. FML

#20765003
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23683) - you deserved it (48810)

On 07/05/2013 at 11:16am - misc - by forever young (woman) - United States

Today, I saw a small child take a really bad fall off his scooter, so I got rid of my cigarette and ran to help him. I asked him if he was alright, or if I could walk him to his house. He replied "I'm okay, but your dress is on fire." It was. FML

#13147361
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23683) - you deserved it (15380)

On 09/21/2010 at 8:31pm - misc - by Laura - United States



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