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Today, I was drunk at my nan's birthday party. My boyfriend texted me asking if I could go out, to which I replied "No, I'm at my nan's house." He then dumped me, calling me a 'cheating whore.' I was confused, until I realised I'd misspelt nan and said "No, I'm at my man's house." FML

#169078
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20691) - you deserved it (41950)

On 03/01/2009 at 9:20am - love - by Mandy (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my friend's van ran out of gas on an expressway off-ramp. After pushing it to the shoulder, we walked to a gas station and got a can of gas. We got back to the van to find that the battery had died from leaving on the lights and hazards to avoid an accident. FML

#13218546
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20689) - you deserved it (6636)

On 09/27/2010 at 1:56am - misc - by stranded (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got a round brush stuck in my hair so badly that I couldn't get it out for 45 minutes, and had a panic attack. I had to drive through town with a brush dangling from my head, to the hair salon, and listen to them laugh while they got it out. FML

#18394314
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20689) - you deserved it (8095)

On 11/30/2011 at 2:25pm - misc - by maggie (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I took my two kids to a Christmas festival with a train theme. I spent $24 on conductor hats for them. When I gave them the hats, they threw them on the ground and put the red paper bags they came in on their heads. FML

#14289494
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20689) - you deserved it (6395)

On 12/21/2010 at 8:15pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was talking to my co-workers about how I've sadly been an orphan since an early age. One of them exclaimed, "Hey, just like Batman!" FML

#19557716
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20689) - you deserved it (4393)

On 05/01/2012 at 9:58am - work - by Nice (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my fiancé told my mom that she screwed me up. I now have to write an apologetic e-mail to her for something that I agree with, in order for her to stop calling me crying. FML

#5847291
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20687) - you deserved it (3236)

On 10/15/2009 at 11:36pm - misc - by sighoutloud (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had to admit to everyone, including my cable guy, that I'm moving back in with my parents. FML

#12313320
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20688) - you deserved it (8748)

On 08/04/2010 at 5:08pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I spilled my guts to my girlfriend, saying I'm scared that all I do is upset her. I then had to sit through a speech about how upset she was that I hadn't told her sooner. FML

#19699058
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20686) - you deserved it (4228)

On 05/29/2012 at 1:50pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Flevoland)

Today, I got threatened to get dragged out of the window at work because I wouldn't sell someone hot wings. I work at Taco Bell. FML

#20123506
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20686) - you deserved it (1543)

On 10/19/2012 at 2:43am - work - by Taco Hell - United States (Ohio)

Today, I have come to the point in my life where I need to Google how to stop excessive back sweat. FML

#17851509
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20685) - you deserved it (3079)

On 09/27/2011 at 10:18pm - health - by MissPerspirent (woman) - Canada

Today, I was taking a shower at the gym when hearing a loud popping noise. Surprised and startled, I jumped and slipped, hitting my head against the shower wall that left a small gash. The pop noise was just someone blowing bubbles from their gum. FML

#18685052
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20684) - you deserved it (4980)

On 01/02/2012 at 10:38am - misc - by Anon O'Mous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was trying to get money out of an ATM. It gave me twenty dollars short, so I started hitting it and kicking it, just as the Chubb security guys came up to refill it. I got tazered. Twice. FML

#4595424
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20681) - you deserved it (42189)

On 08/17/2009 at 6:42am - money - by SnakeEyes (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I applied for my job, while working at my job. I hope they hire me. FML

#9171908
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20681) - you deserved it (5310)

On 03/17/2010 at 10:12pm - work - by TheSuregeon (man) - United States (Kentucky)



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