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Today, I went on a trip with some people from work to watch a baseball game. Halfway through the game, one of my managers shook my hand and said "Nice to Meet You." I've been working there for 3 months. FML

#12472687
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24571) - you deserved it (4065)

On 08/12/2010 at 5:03am - work - by skyphoenix (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I finally finished my summer assignments for three AP classes. My schedule also arrived. Turns out my school can't place me in any of them, and I just wasted the last four weeks of my summer. FML

#20028136
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24565) - you deserved it (2048)

On 08/18/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by spandexwiener (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I spent some of my pay on a birthday gift for my wife. She found out about the money going missing from our account, and now she thinks I'm having an affair. I work 24/7 and barely have time to see my friends, let alone have an affair. FML

#19575026
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24565) - you deserved it (1802)

On 05/04/2012 at 10:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I found out that I can get my girlfriend to make more sex noises by massaging her back than I can by actually having sex with her. FML

#19480957
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24564) - you deserved it (6940)

On 04/16/2012 at 9:59pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my dad got over his aversion to tight pants, giving everyone at the DMV a good look at his package in skin-tight blue jeans. FML

#21402857
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24566) - you deserved it (2036)

On 05/01/2015 at 11:25am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I was walking my dogs when I noticed one of them had found something, and was eating it. After my command to "drop it" went unheeded, I took it upon myself to scoop it out of her mouth with my finger. After getting it all over my hand, I realized it was a piece of another dog's poop. FML

#5885863
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24562) - you deserved it (6384)

On 10/18/2009 at 9:11pm - animals - by Mary - Sent from mobile version

Today, my intoxicated husband asked my very conservative parents how their sex life is now that all the kids are out of the house. FML

#20088791
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24561) - you deserved it (2831)

On 09/25/2012 at 9:48pm - intimacy - by kiwi2323 (woman) - United States

Today, I found out why my girlfriend comes over for dinner so often. She thinks my dad is a real babe. FML

#19514086
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24557) - you deserved it (1894)

On 04/22/2012 at 10:43pm - love - by jack - Australia (Victoria)

Today, we finally got our first electricity bill for our new flat. I was shocked to see that we had used £60 worth of electricity in 6 weeks. Then I noticed that it was only an estimate, and that we could read the meter ourselves to correct the amount. We now have to pay nearly £400. FML

#6038057
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24555) - you deserved it (7156)

On 10/28/2009 at 10:47am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my mom went to the store. She said she was feeling generous, and had gotten everyone a little treat. My brothers each got candy and a movie. I got acne medication. FML

#19001319
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24553) - you deserved it (3106)

On 02/05/2012 at 1:49pm - misc - by CaityLovesBo - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, claiming moving in was a bad idea and he is the type who needs his privacy. It was his idea to move in, he had to convince me. Now we are stuck, under lease together for the next 6 months. FML

#7874212
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24551) - you deserved it (3215)

On 02/04/2010 at 11:03am - love - by Awkward - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mom and siblings got into a fight. Being generally quiet and non-confrontational, I stayed out of it. Shortly thereafter, I was yelled at by my mother for being "ungrateful" and "disrespectful." I still don't know what I did wrong. FML

#18781319
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24550) - you deserved it (2170)

On 01/12/2012 at 12:00am - kids - by tiredoffamilydinners (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally decided to get a dog. I have always been wanting to get one ever since I was a child. I bought a $1,400 Golden Retriever. I went out for lunch a few hours later with a friend, so I left my dog in the backyard. I came back home to a broken fence and no dog. FML

#909263
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24548) - you deserved it (60280)

On 04/10/2009 at 11:40pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)



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