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Today, my annoying and disrespectful roommate discovered Pandora. She also discovered that she can play Christmas music on Pandora. Only 23 more days until Christmas. FML

#14065722
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21545) - you deserved it (3735)

On 12/02/2010 at 10:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I walked into the kitchen to eat some breakfast. I got a full visual of my drunk neighbor dancing naked in my backyard. FML

#19297071
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21545) - you deserved it (1795)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:41pm - misc - by vanorav (man) - United States (California)

Today, I broke my little toe. It got stuck in my panties as I struggled to get a leg through. FML

#19283083
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21545) - you deserved it (5692) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/15/2012 at 3:28pm - health - by Sica - France

Today, my boss asked me to take some of the female mannequins and change the outfits. As I was changing them, I realized that this was the most action I've gotten in almost a year. Not only am I twenty-seven, but I'm married. FML

#5346939
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21544) - you deserved it (3040)

On 09/19/2009 at 4:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was upset over a recent break up. It showed while I was at work, and I made a customer sad just by looking blue. She complained to my manager. I got written up for being so depressed that I got a customer depressed too. FML

#19993921
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21544) - you deserved it (3059)

On 07/31/2012 at 2:42am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was diagnosed with pneumonia. My breathing is short and heavy, and I wanted my boyfriend to comfort me. Instead, he called me Darth Vader, patted me on the head, and said, "Don't worry, the Force will be with you." FML

#20192329
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21542) - you deserved it (3713)

On 12/05/2012 at 12:55pm - health - by Emily - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mom and I took my senile grandmother to the mall, since she doesn't get out much. She complained it was hot, then took her clothing off in the middle of the food court. It took us thirty minutes to make her put her shirt back on. FML

#20187746
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21540) - you deserved it (1872)

On 12/02/2012 at 9:05am - misc - by Sam - United States (Indiana)

Today, I told my boyfriend that I don't like his facial hair and that he should shave it off. He replied, "You first." FML

#155544
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21540) - you deserved it (42117)

On 02/27/2009 at 7:34pm - misc - by bojangles (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my dad put in wall plug-ins that emit high frequencies that are suppose to ward off mice. I must be a mouse, because I can hear the annoying noise in every room I walk into. FML

#19031754
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21539) - you deserved it (1748)

On 02/09/2012 at 12:37am - misc - by Ihaveaheadache - United States (Texas)

Today, I was in the shops and the lights all of a sudden went out. I got really scared for no reason because it was pitch black and grabbed onto my mum's hand. When the light's got turned on I was holding on to a random guy's hand. FML

#9572677
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21538) - you deserved it (8693)

On 04/02/2010 at 7:33am - misc - by Gina - Thailand (Krung Thep)

Today, in a big meeting, my secretary calls me saying that I have an important call waiting. I put the call through. It was my beautician, confirming my appointment to get rid of an ingrown hair. I hurriedly confirm and hang up to see everyone in the room giggling. The speaker phone was on. FML

#6300259
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21537) - you deserved it (6470)

On 11/14/2009 at 12:31pm - misc - by SpeakerPhone (woman) - France (Alsace)

Today, I got married. I received a beautifully wrapped gift from my dad. I was full of excitement until I opened it and found two taxidermied rabbits. The ones I had when I was in the fifth grade. FML

#20120354
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21534) - you deserved it (1599)

On 10/16/2012 at 10:48pm - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I let my daughter bake a cake for her brother's fifth birthday party. She showed up later with a cake in the shape of a cock and balls. Apparently it's okay, though, because "I frosted it to look like a rocket, hehehe!" I can't believe my balls spawned this moron. FML

#19867387
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21534) - you deserved it (6041)

On 06/29/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



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