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Today, I had to announce to the whole house that I was going the bathroom, because the lock on the door is broken. Before I had the chance to wipe, my dad loudly burst through the door, stark bollock naked, to take a shower. FML

#17388987
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23730) - you deserved it (2194)

On 08/06/2011 at 5:06pm - misc - by Pinkie (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my extremely overweight roommate decided to not only be a nudist, but also to get in shape for his new lifestyle. He's been doing naked lunges in our room for the last twenty minutes. FML

#20145644
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23729) - you deserved it (1734)

On 11/03/2012 at 12:04pm - misc - by xXfloatingshitlogXx (woman) - Norway (Akershus)

Today, my doctor told me my ankle has been fractured since last week. I've been helping drywall the basement, and trying to walk up and down stairs for a week. My husband has been telling me to man up, and it's not that bad. FML

Today, I went to feed my neighbor's cat while he was out of town. The cat was sick, so part of my job was to give it a pill each time I came. Cats don't like swallowing pills. My neighbor forgot to mention that his cat wasn't declawed. I was wearing shorts. FML

#14199990
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23723) - you deserved it (5607)

On 12/14/2010 at 6:52am - health - by anonymous - United States

Today, I walked to my car to find a window smashed in. Lucky for me, nothing was stolen. It did, however, rain all morning. FML

#7397995
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23722) - you deserved it (2016)

On 01/17/2010 at 12:45pm - misc - by russty (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to the gynecologist for the first time. I was so nervous that when she extended her hand to shake mine, I gave her my handbag instead. FML

#18792975
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23721) - you deserved it (3821)

On 01/13/2012 at 2:48am - health - by shellie - Reserved

Today, my boyfriend told my hamster he loved her. Repeatedly. In 'cute' baby voices. He has yet to tell me. FML

#8039687
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23719) - you deserved it (5243)

On 02/09/2010 at 1:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I stepped out for some fresh air while I waited for my clothes to dry at the laundromat. Just as I was retrieving my clothes, a disheveled-looking kid staggered over, pushed me aside, and started vomiting his guts out all over my fresh clothes. FML

#19833959
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23719) - you deserved it (1612)

On 06/23/2012 at 12:59pm - misc - by herpmonster (woman) - Italy

Today, I asked a guy out on a coffee date, and we started talking about our mutual careers. At the end of the date he asked me if I had any more questions about job opportunities or any more advice, then shook my hand and gave me his contact card. FML

#5748
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23719) - you deserved it (3196)

On 02/02/2009 at 7:54pm - love - by myrie (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found a note on the front door of my flat saying, "You left your keys in your garage door so I put them in your letter box". Guess where my letter box key is. FML

#17737867
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23718) - you deserved it (6080)

On 09/13/2011 at 5:40pm - misc - by steph - China

Today, I used a red-eye removal tool on one of my photos. I quickly realised how bad my acne is when the software couldn't distinguish between my eyes and cheeks. FML

#19856551
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23718) - you deserved it (2545) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/27/2012 at 4:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I locked my keys in my car and called AAA. He got out to take a look at my car, and he locked himself out of his own car with his tools inside. It took us 40 minutes with a screwdriver and stick to unlock his car and 40 seconds to unlock mine after. 9 hours later, I found my extra key. FML

#7302143
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23717) - you deserved it (5408)

On 01/12/2010 at 4:51pm - misc - by Dani (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, trying to be cute, I told my soon-to-be husband he was the ying to my yang. He responded with "Baby, you're the Monica Lewinsky to my Bill Clinton." FML

#13762058
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23717) - you deserved it (7887)

On 11/08/2010 at 4:50am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)



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