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Today, I was talking on the phone to my crush so I went into the bathroom for some privacy. My drunk mother started banging on the door, asking what I was doing in there. I told her that I was on the phone, so she yelled super loud, "While you're shitting?" He immediately hung up. FML

#19740850
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24136) - you deserved it (3756)

On 06/05/2012 at 9:19pm - love - by whyme27 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, after having lost my phone three days ago, I paid a $150 non-refundable fee to have my phone replaced and mailed to me by Tuesday. A half hour later, I found my original phone. FML

#20491153
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24139) - you deserved it (14655)

On 02/03/2013 at 2:14am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while I was out, I was having a drink with a pretty girl. She started looking at my crotch and said, smiling, "There's something burning down there." I smiled, but she insisted. Ashes had set my trousers on fire. FML

#345
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24140) - you deserved it (4698)

On 11/19/2008 at 11:37pm - misc - by lageste - Sent from mobile version

Today, it was my first day at work as a waitress. The day ended with me owing my employers money, after I accidentally smashed an expensive bottle of wine on the floor. FML

#18493927
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24135) - you deserved it (4700)

On 12/12/2011 at 12:08pm - work - by isuckasawaitress (woman) - Singapore

Today, I had to go into the school for the third time this week because my son is claiming he's on bath salts and biting all his classmates. My son is 16. FML

#20061403
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24135) - you deserved it (2960)

On 09/07/2012 at 1:08am - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while sitting next to the cute guy in my English class, I had to sneeze. I turned away from him and sneezed into my arm. My long hair got in the way and I accidentally shot a huge snot rocket into my hair. I spent the rest of the class trying to get it out without him noticing. FML

#14450678
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24134) - you deserved it (4582)

On 01/03/2011 at 12:17pm - misc - by klyoung5 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up to find my power was out. After taking a shower in the dark and being unable to make myself lunch, my power came on two minutes before I had to leave for school. FML

#10669832
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24138) - you deserved it (3564)

On 05/21/2010 at 3:12pm - misc - by Samuel (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I came home to a flooded apartment and water still pouring from the ceiling. The woman who lives above me is shocked that I would consider her responsible for the damage and doesn't think she should have to pay for it. FML

#20444637
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24130) - you deserved it (1544)

On 01/06/2013 at 5:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend texted me saying he had left a surprise on my driveway. Thinking it was something special, I went outside to look. It was a little bag of mayonnaise packets. FML

#18750908
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24133) - you deserved it (3570)

On 01/08/2012 at 9:41pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I'm at the unique point in my schooling that I'm either extremely overqualified or extremely underqualified for every job opportunity that appeals to me. FML

#21344707
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24128) - you deserved it (1936)

On 01/26/2015 at 7:19pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my father told me to take the car and get some groceries. An hour and a half later, coming home with the groceries, I see the cops all around my house because my dad had called them, thinking that I had run away and stolen the car. FML

#20159802
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24125) - you deserved it (1435)

On 11/11/2012 at 11:30pm - misc - by me - United States (Indiana)

Today, I found myself wondering if my sister's jaw makes the same clicking sound when she's giving head as it does when she's eating food. FML

Today, I was telling my co-workers about how I'd gotten tickets to a concert in a few days. My boss overheard. Later, he told me I now have to work on the night of the concert. However, he was kind enough to offer to buy the tickets off me for half of what I'd paid for them. FML

#20106327
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24121) - you deserved it (2135)

On 10/07/2012 at 8:09pm - work - by working_as_usual (man) - United States (California)



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