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Today, my in-laws decided they were going to stay an extra week during our vacation to Dominican Republic next year. This would be fine, if we weren't travelling for our destination wedding, and the extra week wasn't our honeymoon. They are literally joining us on our honeymoon. FML

by SadBride / 09/07/2015 at 8:39pm / United States (Delaware) / Love

Today, my boyfriend informed me that he can't remember the last time he took a shower. He then told me he doesn't see the "need" of taking showers. FML

by Anonymous / 12/02/2010 at 10:35pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, my kitten made it snow inside my house using a 12-pack of toilet paper. FML

by Anonymous / 02/06/2013 at 1:00pm / United States (West Virginia) / Animals

Today, I went to a wine tasting for the first time. I copied the experienced people around me by swishing the wine around in my mouth, which I then choked on and spit out all over my white blouse. FML

by rookiemistake / 04/26/2015 at 11:12pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I noticed white stuff in my colored clothes as I transferred them from the washer to the dryer. That's when I realized that the white stuff is my paycheck which I had put in my pants earlier. FML

by broke_kid / 01/03/2010 at 8:18am / United States (North Carolina) / Money

Today, a wild squirrel managed to get into my house. I can't see him but I hear him in the walls. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2010 at 6:16am / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, I was chopping weeds with a weed whacker. I heard something get caught in the blades, and realized it was a frog when the leg hit me in the eye. The rest of the chopped frog ended up on my face. FML

by Anonymous / 09/14/2010 at 7:41pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals

Today, I showed up on set for a film that I booked a role in weeks ago. At the time of the audition, the script was being rewritten, so today I was so excited and eager to be told what my role would entail. When they handed me the script, my character was described as a fat, ugly, awkward girl. FML

by okaythen6 / 12/09/2009 at 6:13am / United States (New Jersey) / Work

Today, the girl I'm dating mentioned that she'd had her healthy wisdom teeth removed to prevent her future children from having wisdom teeth. I laughed. She wasn't joking. FML

by Timmeeh / 10/10/2012 at 12:45pm / United Kingdom (Monmouthshire) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after recently getting my car fully serviced and fixed, the horn has decided to spontaneously beep. To stop the beeping I have to press the horn hard, making it look like I'm purposely doing it to piss people off. FML

Today, I found out why I'm always let off easy when I do something wrong at work. They think I have a mental handicap. I don't. I'm just clumsy and forgetful. FML

by Clumsy & Forgetful / 11/27/2011 at 1:02am / Canada / Work

Today, a wasp knocked me out, broke my glasses, and left a gash over my eyebrow. It did so by flying under my glasses while I was playing my guitar, causing me to reflexively bat at it with the hand that was still grasping the guitar neck. FML

by JimiHendrix / 02/28/2013 at 8:55pm / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Health

Today, my fiancé was performing oral on me, when I heard him start making a "Waka waka waka waka" noise. He confessed to pretending to be Pacman. FML

by Anonymous / 10/03/2009 at 9:03pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy