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Today, I was walking through the bar area of the restaurant I work at and fell on my ass. Customers complained to my manager that I shouldn't be drinking on the job. FML

#6688829
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24496) - you deserved it (2543)

On 12/10/2009 at 12:14am - love - by Melinda (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was really excited to be observing my first autopsy for my forensics class. Apparently so was the guy behind me. He barfed up ramen noodles all over my hair and back. I couldn't leave the room to clean up. For two hours. FML

#8313100
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24496) - you deserved it (1558)

On 02/15/2010 at 8:25pm - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, uncertain of having a job next month or being able to pay rent, I'm filling out tens of online surveys a day for gift cards to McDonald's, to buy hamburgers that I can freeze so I will have food for the coming months. FML

#20065270
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24496) - you deserved it (2569)

On 09/09/2012 at 8:45pm - money - by willtype4food (man) - Finland

Today, I came home from holiday, only to find my house full of small decomposing animals, courtesy of my cat. FML

#17458169
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24495) - you deserved it (4764)

On 08/13/2011 at 6:22am - animals - by Ellencrazee (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, my cheating, psycho asscricket of an ex texted me and asked me back out. I said no, and didn't think any more of it, at least until an hour later, when I looked out my window, only to see him smearing a bag of dog crap all over my porch. FML

#20020463
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24495) - you deserved it (2016)

On 08/14/2012 at 11:02am - love - by WELLFUCKYOUTOO (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was just about to sit down to watch my favorite TV show when my dog jumped over the back of my couch, landed on my head and tried to jump through the window. I now have concussion and a window to replace, all because of a bird. FML

#18038155
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24494) - you deserved it (2804)

On 10/21/2011 at 11:35am - animals - by Mr.P - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was at work when a customer, who was going to pay for her groceries, started sorting through her money. She put some coins in her mouth, seemed to suck on them for a while, and then gave them to me. FML

#19712104
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24495) - you deserved it (1552)

On 05/31/2012 at 9:20pm - work - by Elmoo - Netherlands

Today, I'm on holiday with my boyfriend. Going through Chinese customs, an officer pulled us aside, removed a suspicious metal object from my boyfriend's luggage and called six other officers to have a look. It was a kinky pair of handcuffs. FML

#18235563
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24491) - you deserved it (5741)

On 11/13/2011 at 7:46am - love - by notthatkinkyanyway - China (Beijing)

Today, the last customer of the night shift handed me their money along with a wad of their hair. FML

#20484636
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24491) - you deserved it (2067)

On 01/29/2013 at 11:39am - work - by imwithapples22 (man) - United States

Today, I was at a Chinese restaurant with my boyfriend and his family. After the meal, we all decided to open our fortune cookies and read them out loud. On mine, it said "You will change your mind many times before settling down." I didn't realize what it meant until after I'd read it to them. FML

#18009557
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24490) - you deserved it (4431)

On 10/17/2011 at 8:16pm - love - by pupitre (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend's mother told me she bought the same perfume that my boyfriend got me for Christmas last year. He loves that perfume. Now, whenever he smells me, he's going to think of his mom. FML

#18097198
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24489) - you deserved it (2518)

On 10/28/2011 at 4:25pm - love - by Annoyed (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I asked my classmate to look over my essay. His comments were longer than the essay itself. FML

#21398217
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24489) - you deserved it (4973)

On 04/22/2015 at 10:53pm - misc - by englishornah (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my entire family came over for thanksgiving. It went pretty well, only four family members got in a fist fight and only one cop car was called. FML

#18341850
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24488) - you deserved it (1907)

On 11/24/2011 at 9:49pm - misc - by guy - United States



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