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Today, I fell off a ladder while building a shelter for one of my wife's horses. I think I broke some ribs. I absolutely hate horses. FML

#18499022
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21875) - you deserved it (5675)

On 12/12/2011 at 10:47pm - health - by CessnaPilot - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend of six months broke up with me because of 'creative differences', as she put it. The real reason is that we couldn't decide which cupboard the plates should have gone in. FML

#12797067
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21873) - you deserved it (3811)

On 08/29/2010 at 12:21am - love - by nottelling7012 (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boss asked me if I had any special plans for Christmas. After I told him I was planning a trip to Canada, he snapped, "Well, you can forget it. I need you at the office." FML

#20173791
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21873) - you deserved it (1471)

On 11/22/2012 at 12:35pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I bought my mother an apple pie. She made a face at it and said that she'd decided to go on a diet. After I'd left the house, she put it in the oven, forgot about it, and burnt it to a crisp. She then called me up to inform me that I'd wasted my money, and to get her "another damn pie." FML

#19024888
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21872) - you deserved it (1688)

On 02/08/2012 at 6:27am - misc - by 3.14 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up after taking a sleep pill for the first time. I started in on a number of chores including paying bills when I noticed a new charge on my online credit card bill from 1am. I bought $120 worth of meat from an infomercial. It's non-refundable. I'm vegetarian. FML

#6434122
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21871) - you deserved it (10291)

On 11/24/2009 at 7:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, the man I went on a date with a few weeks ago finally called me back. I was his "one phone call" from prison. FML

#19980162
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21870) - you deserved it (1947)

On 07/23/2012 at 7:06pm - love - by Rose (woman) - United States

Today, I had to call 911. Why? My fireplace caught on fire. FML

#6753816
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21870) - you deserved it (5864)

On 12/14/2009 at 7:00pm - misc - by fire - United States

Today, after months of teaching my parrot to speak, he finally demonstrated his abilities. I accidentally set off my smoke detector, and he's been wailing like a dying banshee ever since. FML

#19260934
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21867) - you deserved it (3293)

On 03/11/2012 at 11:04pm - animals - by weep weep weep (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was loading a very large box into my hatchback. I was really struggling, and a few people walked by and laughed. Then a car pulled up and waited for the spot. There isn't a spring to hold my trunk open, so it slammed onto my head. Twice. The car honked for me to hurry up. FML

#8729495
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21865) - you deserved it (2008)

On 02/28/2010 at 8:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I accidentally kicked a can and it hit a man's shoe. He tried to kick it at me but his foot somehow failed to connect with the can. I could hear it rattling behind me as he failed again and again. So he decided to run up behind me and throw it at my head. FML

#19586621
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21865) - you deserved it (5256)

On 05/07/2012 at 10:08am - misc - by thepigeonsfriend (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my coworker was talking to me about how there's always that one person in a group of friends that everyone secretly dislikes and laughs at. I realized that person is me. FML

#19434317
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21864) - you deserved it (2534)

On 04/09/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Foreveralone (woman) - United States

Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me, and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML

#20195284
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21864) - you deserved it (2601)

On 12/07/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, while working in a jail, I had to tell an inmate arrested for domestic violence that no, he could not use his phone call to call me at home. FML

#17892282
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21862) - you deserved it (1890)

On 10/02/2011 at 11:29pm - work - by Anonymous - United States



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