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Today, I went to the gynecologist. As she was checking me out, she said, "Wow. So you must get wet a lot." It took me several minutes to realize she was talking about my job bathing dogs. FML

#19820234
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24025) - you deserved it (3055)

On 06/20/2012 at 7:08pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I purposely wore a red shirt to Target just so people would talk to me. FML

#19601147
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24024) - you deserved it (9968)

On 05/10/2012 at 2:44am - misc - by reddd - United States

Today, I sent a guy that I like a lot a picture of myself, I got all dressed up sexy and did my make-up. He sent me a reply saying "your cat is fat". FML

#5809
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24023) - you deserved it (5905)

On 02/02/2009 at 9:36pm - love - by Noname - United States (California)

Today, I got mugged. They wanted my phone and wallet. The most important thing in my wallet was my fully punched Smoothie King card. FML

#9100714
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24022) - you deserved it (3547)

On 03/15/2010 at 11:05am - money - by ashleeylynn - United States

Today, I learned that everyone at college was calling me "Parallel Lines" because I've got an unibrow and an apparent hairiness over my mouth. By the way, I'm a girl. FML

#13764859
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24021) - you deserved it (14511)

On 11/08/2010 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got hit by a Salami log thrown from a car; its metal wire cut my shoulder. I got scarred by a flying hunk of pig. FML

#13320249
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24021) - you deserved it (2358)

On 10/04/2010 at 7:31pm - misc - by ifpigsflew (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I went horseback riding with this guy I like. I asked him to help me get on the horse. I slipped, and while trying to keep my balance, I kicked him in the face. FML

#14267759
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24022) - you deserved it (5080)

On 12/20/2010 at 1:22am - love - by Me -

Today, I was so excited to finally use my $45 gift card to a hair salon. I walk up to the doors to find them locked and to look inside to see that the salon was not only closed but out of business. FML

#9093072
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24019) - you deserved it (4432)

On 03/15/2010 at 12:51am - money - by Fridaythe12th (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a student came in late to class, and there were only a couple of seats available. I waved her over offering her the seat beside me with the quip, "It's OK, you can sit by me. I don't smell or anything." I realized after she sat down that she actually did. FML

#18569258
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24018) - you deserved it (4666)

On 12/21/2011 at 10:33am - misc - by Derpina - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I walked into my house with a couple of friends and I saw my girlfriend doing laundry. I jokingly asked her if she had time to do a load of mine as well. She scoffed and said, "Yeah babe, I'll gladly do your laundry... The same day you learn to wipe properly." FML

#21058908
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24018) - you deserved it (50992)

On 02/13/2014 at 7:43am - love - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I went through my spam folder. I found out that I'd received several emails telling me that I have been sending emails containing essays for a class of mine to the wrong address. The term ended yesterday. FML

#13759888
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24015) - you deserved it (10645)

On 11/08/2010 at 12:02am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, whilst in the last week of my notice period, I was instructed by my boss to tell six new employees that their jobs had fallen through before they'd even started. Later that afternoon, I received a call from my line manager. Guess whose own job has fallen through too. FML

#21397399
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24018) - you deserved it (1754)

On 04/21/2015 at 12:45pm - work - by Karma (woman) - United Kingdom (Newport)

Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML

#14767473
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24011) - you deserved it (7877)

On 01/30/2011 at 12:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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