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Today, I was in a rush and had to get changed in a train restroom. While changing, I leaned against the button that opened the door. Not only do train toilet doors open and close very slowly, leaving you half naked for a few seconds, but everyone in the carriage opposite can see clearly. FML

#18090204
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20499) - you deserved it (3584)

On 10/27/2011 at 5:41pm - misc - by omgomgomg (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I decided to pull some weeds in my backyard. Everything was going great until I got a concussion. My dog thought that it would be fun to headbutt me from a running start. Twice. FML

#19440536
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20496) - you deserved it (2424)

On 04/09/2012 at 11:50pm - animals - by Lee (woman) - United States

Today, at work, I jumped under my desk in fear of a nuclear missile attack when the firestation next us let out its new awareness siren. I think I'm going insane. FML

#20410599
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20496) - you deserved it (7068)

On 12/21/2012 at 1:47am - misc - by Insane Guy (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend, who lives 100 miles away and whom I haven't seen in 2 months, told me he was visiting my city with some friends. I assumed this was an opening to an invitation, but no, he just asked me about the best places to get drunk. FML

#20013231
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20496) - you deserved it (2756)

On 08/10/2012 at 8:57am - misc - by blink_kid - United Kingdom (West Lothian)

Today, I told my husband that after fifteen years of marriage, I wanted a divorce. His first question was whether or not he could still go on the family cruise my parents are paying for in May. FML

#8995755
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20494) - you deserved it (9378)

On 03/11/2010 at 12:13pm - love - by danikka1 - United States

Today, I had my boss over for dinner. Knowing that I was angling for a promotion, my fifteen-year-old son spent the dinner uttering lines such as "What's the point of showering before bed?" and "Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks." My boss was not impressed. FML

#20051346
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20494) - you deserved it (4163)

On 08/31/2012 at 7:16pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I'm too sunburned to masturbate. Now I have nothing to do. FML

#16432194
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20493) - you deserved it (63929)

On 05/31/2011 at 7:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, right before a huge snowstorm hit our area, I broke up with my girlfriend. In her fury, she decided to grab my car keys and roll down all four windows in my car. I now have 2 feet of half melted snow in my backseat. FML

#7923030
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20491) - you deserved it (10168)

On 02/06/2010 at 12:12am - love - by snowman (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while cuddling with my boyfriend in the dark, he grabbed onto a fat roll and asked, "Is this your stomach or boob?" I didn't have the heart to tell him it was a back roll. FML

#13741680
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20490) - you deserved it (23003)

On 11/06/2010 at 6:37pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I changed my relationship status on Facebook from "in a relationship" to "single." I forgot to take my phone to work, and when I got back, I saw someone had replied, "What happened?" Someone else commented, "He broke his hand." My ex and a bunch of other "friends" liked it. FML

#18935378
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20487) - you deserved it (4258)

On 01/28/2012 at 4:52pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend showed his mother photos of me. He told her that he thinks I'm pretty. She said that I look like a celebrity from her country (Korea). Flattered, I online searched this celebrity, and turns out she is a local porn star who's undergone multiple cosmetic surgeries. FML

#2388
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20486) - you deserved it (1955)

On 01/23/2009 at 8:55pm - love - by sigh - United States (New York)

Today, while at work, I cringed as I noticed my caveman colleague frantically digging into his nose and then continuing the use of his computer. I work in IT support and will be rebuilding his computer and reinstalling all his applications in 30 minutes time. FML

#14034046
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20484) - you deserved it (1959)

On 11/30/2010 at 9:07am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom



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